Shh,
Mommy and Daddy decided to have you,
Well, we didn't really decide, It just happened,
When you were born, we were very happy,
And we still are,
But separately,
Daddy has his apartment and Mommy has her apartment,
And Daddy can see Lulu whenever he wants,
Everything is great,
Now your grandpa is coming to visit
and you have to be very cuddly with him
because not long ago
Granny ﬂew away into the sky,
And now Papi is sad and lonely,
But Auntie Rose is coming, too,
It's going to be a par-ty! Par-ty! Par-ty! Par-ty! Par-ty!
Today marks the sixth consecutive day the man that calls himself the Oak Fairy
remains perched and tied to the oldest oak tree in Central Park,
refusing to come down until officials bring him written proof
the tree will not be cut down,
No news yet from Mayor Bloomberg's office,
- We'll keep you posted as,,, - Save the trees or die!
Save the trees! Save the trees! I will not come down,
I'm the Oak Fairy and I have a message for New York,
If I can do it here, I can do it anywhere, It's up to you, New York,
- That's my heavy bud, - Time you got in your own bed,
I have provisions for five months and I have a device here
that can turn snow into drinking water,
- We love you! - I will not come down!
Let's ﬂy!
- It's funny, - Oh, what?
I always feel way more comfortable having sex without the kids in bed,
- Me, too, It's crazy, - It's crazy,
- It's so weird, I don't know why, - It's so weird,
- We can do all sorts of shit, - They're kind of in the way,
I know,
Uh-oh,
- Now, that's,,, - No,
- I need to take this, - Oh, come on,
- It's probably my dad, It is my dad, Ow, - He's a big boy,
Oh, God,
OK, He's already up,
OK,,, hon,,,
maybe this is a little too much this week,
You've got your family coming to visit, your exhibit, you're selling your soul,,,
You're so sweet to worry about me but I want my dad to be here
because it's very important for me,
It's my biggest exhibit in years,
I just want what's best for you,
- Know what's best for me? - What?
I really want them to meet my sweet, sweet, little koala bear,
Who's my sweet, little koala bear?
- Is that what I have to say to get laid? - Yes, Say it, Say it,
I have to say I'm your koala bear?
Yes, You know what koala bears do?
They go up and down the trees,
You know, like,,,
No, no, but,,, Oh, my God,
No, no, It's a fur ball, sweetie,
- No! - No, I gotta take care of that,
It's,,, Last time, Lulu ate it, I can't,
Plus you're always going down on me with the glasses, It's weird,
I know, I was gonna take 'em off,
Let me fill you in,
I met Mingus through his sister Elizabeth,
who's been my friend ever since I moved to New York,
A few years ago, Mingus and I ended up working together at the Village Voice,
Lulu was about eight months old
and things had started to get sort of,,, messy with Jack,
Around that time, Mingus became my confidant of sorts,
What's gonna happen to me if I leave him?
Hey, when things go bad, it's best to just walk,
- I walked twice and didn't regret it, - But you're a man, It's easier for you,
Who's gonna want me? OK? I'm gonna be 38,
- I'm fat and a pain in the ass, - But you're French,
I have a kid, I'm struggling with incontinence,
OK? Don't tell anyone,
I can't even sneeze, But I'm doing my exercise, OK?
I'm squeezing right now, I'm squeezing everywhere I go,
When I'm taking pictures, I'm squeezing all the time, Right now I am,
Squeezing, squeezing, squeezing, squeezing, squeezing, squeezing,
OK, I'm letting go,
I'm squeezing again,
Squeezing, squeezing, I'm squeezing all the time,
Let's face it, my love life is over,
37, We haven't had sex in one year,
- Get outta here! - He doesn't even want a blow job,
- It was my specialty, - Oh,
Who is this guy? You're fucked, man, Just go pump,
I know, I gotta go, Oh, it hurts,
- Pump, - Yeah, I gotta pump,
OK, I'll see you at the photo shoot, I'm so sad,
- Come on, Frenchie, You're gonna be good, - It's over,
I've known you a while, You'll bounce back,
- You mean like a big ball? - Like a big beach ball,
- He hates me, He hates me, He hates me, - No, no, no, no,
Come on, blow,
And the post-baby big ball that I was bounced right into his arms,
Was it pity? Was it love?
Was it my innocent comment about blow jobs?
I'll never be sure,
All I know is that six months later, baby in hand, I was moving in with Mingus,
And so far, so good, Actually, things have never been better,
♪ ,,on old Delancey Street, you know
♪ The subway charms us so
♪ When balmy breezes blow
♪ To and fro,,,
Is that it?
Do I need to look anywhere else, sir?
What the hell is this thing?
- Oh, New York, we made it, baby! We made it! - Oh,
If we can make it here, we can make it anywhere!
Oh là là,
Hey! Look who's here!
- International sausage smugglers! - Oh, Mingus!
Jeannot! Jeannot,
- Pleased to meet you, - Kiss!
- Kiss! One, two, three, - Three,
Whoo!
I never got three before,
He had so many presents for us - sausages - but they took it at Customs,
They took the sausage but not the smell,
So you're giving us something right now, Whoo!
And you must be the famous sister, Rose,
Er,,, yes, Famous for what, please?
Uh,,, pleased to meet you,
Famous Rose,
- And you are? - Oh, I'm Manu,
Super nice meeting you, I'm Rose's boyfriend,
I used to be Marion's boyfriend but now I'm with Rose,
Sweet, Sweet, I gotta make a call,
- Don't sweat it, I can sleep anywhere, I'm easy, - Good for you,
Ming, You like Salt-N-Pepa?
You mean, like seasoning on food?
No, I mean the rap,,, the rap band,
You know, "Let's talk about sex, baby, Let's talk about you and me,"
Anyway,,, It was a big song in New York,
- You must know that, - 20 years ago,
- Oh, yeah, Maybe, - Yeah,
My dad,,, he doesn't want to take a shower, He thinks it depletes the immune system,
- Depletes it? My God, - I know, And it's gonna smell,,,
- I know, - He smells now,
Uh,,, Are you mad at me for this guy coming?
Sorry, I had no idea my sister would bring him,
Should I be mad? It's just your ex camped out in our living room,
My ex? Did he say that?
Yes, he said he's your ex,
He's crazy, He's out of his mind, He's totally delusional,
We fooled around 100 years ago,
- Barely fooled around, - I've fooled around with you,
You get serious when you fool around,
He's mildly schizophrenic, He's totally crazy,
You can't be "mildly schizophrenic",
He hears the nice voices talking to him? He would have killed Ringo and not John?
OK, Listen, Do you like my dad? That's way more important,
- Look how cute he is, - He's very cute,
- We're so alike, We're like twins, - I know, I just want to fuck him right now,
OK, I'm sorry about the guy, I'm sorry she brought him,
- It'll work out but I gotta go to work, - OK, Bye, sweetie,
- I gotta get this call, - We go,
OK,
If you can find somebody that'll do a funny show about Haiti, hire 'em,
- Cos I'm not the guy, - Mingus,
- Mingus, may I have a towel? - Hold on a second,
Towels, cabinet, bathroom,
- The towels are in the cabinet? - Yeah, The lower cabinet,
- Oh, OK, - OK,
Well, who's gonna do it'? Well,,,
I gotta call you back,
Yeah, I gotta call you back, Something just came up,
Mingus, are you leaving? Wait!
That's,,, my robe,
I'm so sorry, I couldn't find the towels,
Do you have a cup of tea? I'm so cold,
Well, the kettle's over there,
I hear you take really good care of Jack's kid, Thank you, From my father and I, thank you,
Lulu's my man,
I have so much admiration for you,
My God, raising the child of another man,
You're so um,,,
What is the word?
Open-minded? Yes'?
Yeah, but,,, I have my limits, I gotta,,,
But the situation must be diff cult for you, no?
- I gotta go, OK? Take care, - Bye, Mingus,
My dad,
For once, Manu's right, My father has always been a very handsome man,
He was born in Saigon, Vietnam, a French colony at the time,
At 18, Jeannot was sent to fight in Algeria,
but refused to kill and was shipped back to France,,,
spending three years cleaning the toilets of 752 dirty soldiers,
Or, as he likes to put it,
seeing more shit than any human being has ever seen,
Then Jeannot went to Paris where he met my mother, Anna,
during May 1968 on a Parisian barricade,
They immediately fell in love
and for 40 years, they stayed happy together,,,
until fate separated them,
Why didn't I find someone like my dad when I was 25?
Someone I would have loved all my life,
Maybe times have changed,
In the 1900s, life expectancy used to be 45,
Now if you meet the love of your life at 25,
you get to live with him for the next 60 years,
That's a lot of sex with the same person,
Or,,, no sex at all for 60 years,
Hey,
No, no, no, no, What are you talking about? I guess she needed a robe,
Yo, homes, you're looking parched,
- Have you been waiting,,, - I'm in the middle of something,
,,,girls to come out of the ocean in DayGlo bikinis?
I'll talk to you later, Love you,
She sidles up to you and whispers in your ear,
“Ay,,, Papi,,, Cola,"
And we are,,, back,
My girlfriend's family just got in fresh from Paris,
Well, not exactly fresh, My father-in-law - or girlfriend's father -
was detained at Customs for four hours for trying to smuggle in 30lb of sausage,
We've got people trying to get bombs in and cocaine,
He seems to think that there's a sausage shortage in America,
You gotta hand it to Homeland Security,
You come in here with a sausage, they will get you,
The vulnerability of man, But I'm very excited about the soul,
We're gonna sell the soul for $10,000,
Oh, and I forgot to mention,
tomorrow at my gallery opening, as an attempt to stand out as an artist,
I am selling my soul,
- What? - Yes, you've heard right,
It is not a figure of speech,
Tomorrow I will sign this contract and it will be sold as a conceptual piece,
- You're selling Marion's soul for $10,000? - It's gonna go like hotcakes,
OK, I will talk to my sister for one second,
I am an artist, too,
I'd love to show you a little,,,
Oh, non, non,
The woman in freeze frame kind of represents to me
like the eternal femininity, you know?
- Yes, - It's pretty French,
Very French,
I'd love to do a show in your gallery,
It's a teeny space but I could use it and put my stuff in it,
Do inst,,, I wouldn't do it like that, I would do installation plus photos,
- It would be a party here, - We can talk about it,
- You love this one, right? - Yeah, Oh, I love it, I love it,
- People like that, - The garbage one,
No, the one with the titty,
I bring everything at the show,
My photos, my sculptures, I do stuff also in macramé,
- I love this country, See you, - Bye,
- See you tomorrow, - Bye, Marion,
- Ah, - on,
- Oh, Willow, Oh, sweetie, you're home? - I got off early and picked up Willow,
- Oh, great, - Hi, Mingus, Willow,
- Hello, Mingus, - Willow, this is my family,
My dad, my sister and,,, a friend,
- Oh, it's beautiful, - Thank you,
You're an artist just like me,
- You beautiful girl, - Thank you,
And Dad says you don't speak English,
You can do sign language,
Me?
New York, New York!
Oh,,,
- Thai? - Sweetie, do you think you can book
an appointment at Thai Hands for my dad?
Yeah, yeah, We can go together, I could use one myself,
You all clean?
Hey, look at my KKK bunny!
Sweetie,
White power! He should be proud of his whiteness,
Hello?
Do you know where I can score some good New York weed?
- I don't smoke, man, - You don't smoke?
No, I don't smoke,
Don't forget to call your sister about dinner tonight,
Yeah, yeah, Sure,
Here we go,
- Hey, How are you? - I'm pretty good,
- Nice to see you, - My father-in-law, Jeannot,
- Nice to meet you, - Come in, Jeannot,
So, um,,,
man or a woman?
- Woman, - Woman, OK,
Woman, That's good, I usually take a man but,,,
- Man? - Yeah, yeah, Yeah, yeah,
My back is really bad and, I mean, I need a massage,
Uh,,, Would you like it hard or soft?
What?
You know what, just get him a woman,
- And a soft,,, You know, something soft, - Sure,
OK, OK, OK,
And then we steam,
We go steam,
- Steam, - Steam,
- Steams? - Yeah, It's relaxing,
- You gotta take off your hat, though, - Hat? No,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Just get the steam all over you,
Yeah, yeah, just come on in,
Enjoy the steam,
Just breathe it in and,,,
,,,and um,,,
You breathe it in and it'll relax you,
It'll relax you,
Very relaxing,
Omar? Omar?
No, no, No crabs here, This place is spotless,
We're in America,
You know, after the steam, we put our underwear back on, and the robe,
and we go get our massage,
Massage,
You and Marion good?
Oh,,, Yeah, We're good, We're good,
Good good?
Jack sex,,,
Ohh,,,
Oh, that's,,,
You want details?
Uh,,, no, you're not getting details,
Mingus sex,,, good,
- OK, - Good sex,
- Good, - Yes,
- Jeannot, ready? - Ah, yes, Hot,
Yes, Ooh,
Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Jeannot!
Jeannot, no, no, no, no, You need your robe! Le robe,
Jeannot! Jeannot, Jeannot, Jeannot, Jeannot,
Full massage,
- Hello? - It's me,
No, not,,,
Not ad services,
No, repair,
Repair,
Repair!
Yes, That's the right address, I'm dealing with this broken buzzer,
- Yes, - I'm Rose,
- I'm Mingus's sister, - Nice to meet you,
First, I'd like to tell you that your automated system is not working properly, OK?
Well, don't,,, Don't have an attitude,
OK, fine, Fine, OK, yeah, my name,
OK, it's Dupré, Dupré, Dupré,
D,,, like Dick,
U like Uterus, P like Penis,
No, I'm not being rude, I'm just spelling my name,
OK, fine, D like Daisies, U like Unicorn, P like Paradise,
R like Roses,
E like,,,
,,,Estrogen, I'm sorry,
Well, yeah, you have an accent too, I'm sorry,
No, OK, don't get angry, OK? Are they coming tomorrow? I need to know,
Thank you, I didn't mean to,,, Yeah, thank you,
Thank you, Yes,
Hi, everyone,
Hey,
Wait, Look at that,
Hup, hup, Hup,
Better, huh?
Oh, Mingus! Sit down,
Come, Have tea with us,
You know, your father-in-law was born in the same street as I was,
Jeannot, I had no idea you spoke Thai,
- No, It's Vietnamese, - Vietnamese,
Oh, Vietnamese, I'm sorry, I thought, cos the sign said Thai massage,
We're all from Saigon,
Saigon, Shit, Still in Saigon,
Apocalypse Now!
It's cool you guys understand each other,
You should use it more often,
- Mingus, can you help me open this? - Sure,
No, Let me show her something,
She's not hungry,
Did anybody told you that you look like Beyoncé?
Beyoncé?
- A lot, actually, - Really? That's a first,
Maybe just a little sexier,
Mm,
Cheesecake?
So, Jeannot, did you like your massage?
- Who's the creep? - My sister's boyfriend,
- He says you happy with Obama, man? - Oh, I'm very happy with Obama,
I mean, there's been a couple of rough patches,
but just because he's a black president doesn't mean I can't get critical,
That's it?
Do radio?
Yes, Yes, yes, yes, yes,
I do a radio show but I also write articles for the Voice,
That's where I met Marion,
- You have a show, too, right? - Yeah, I have a few shows,
Two on public radio and one on serious,
Dead! No good,
Air-conditioning no good,
- Yeah, but it comes in handy in the summer, - True,
- Is everything OK? Are you fighting? - No,
Man,,, you're so lucky to be black,
That's my only regret, you know,
Cos I would have been a cool black man, I'm talking Miles or Prince,
But I'm Jewish, you know, It's good, too,
It's almost the same, We've both been buked forever, Tough shit,
- Buked? - Big-time, bro, Open your eyes,
Open your eyes,
I can't,
- You been buked? - I been buked - apparently,
What's going on here?
Brothers and sisters should love one another,
It is love, honey, It's just um,,, crazy love,
Wait, Wait, wait, wait,
- Shit, - Can this thing calm down'?
It's OK, My dad is,,,
Bad girl,
Marion, can you stop this right now'?
I'm doing nothing wrong, What am I doing'?
Don't bother, They're sisters, They're always like that,
I've known them forever, I gave her her first orgasm,
- What is that? Why is it so loud? - Both of them,
I'm sorry, It's gonna be fixed, Tomorrow,
- Shit, I think it's for me, - For you?
Who the hell's there? Another sister I don't know about?
I'm sorry, She drives me crazy,
Is there something I should know?
When she was a kid, we thought she was really possessed - like by the devil,
We were worried about her,
- What's going on with you? - She told me Lulu is autistic, OK?
- Do you think that's acceptable? - She didn't, You made the jump,
- You make these jumps, - Is Marion's dad OK?
He's fine,
- No, I never jump, - We know Lulu's not autistic,
He's smarter than your whole family,
Who's that?
All right,
Of course, It's what I do, It's my job,
- How you doing? - Who's that man?
He didn't, No, he did,
- I'm looking for heady stuff, - OK,
- Super strong, - OK, I got four kinds,
- That's not right, - There you go,
- What is that man giving to Lulu's uncle? - Nothing,
- He just gave him a little bag, - It's grass, From the park, Central Park,
Why is he paying money for grass from the park?
Because it's a souvenir that he's planning on taking back to France,
They don't have grass in France,
I think it's time for you to go to bed, huh?
- Good night, everybody, - Let's go, sweetie,
Tell her all about,,, that there's no grass in France,
I'm sorry,
- Please, - Yes, I know,
- Deal with this right now, - I'm gonna handle it right now,
I'm gonna handle it right now,
Lulu's up, He's asking for you,
Well,,,
It don't happen again, man,
Don't happen again,
- It don't, - It don't, Ever,
It better don't,
It don't, I'm serious, It don't,
Papa,
Give me a kiss, Mwah,
What you got for me? Yeah!
All right, guys, Sleep tight,
Don't close the door, I'm scared of Teddy,
- Teddy who? - Ted Bundy, Dad,
Oh, he's dead with Hitler, You don't have to worry about him,
Good grief,
Besides, serial killers don't kill little girls, Good night,
Good night, fake daddy,
I can't stand that Willow's mother doesn't monitor what she watches on TV,
All this fuckin' serial killer shit,
By the way, Lulu called me "fake daddy“ again,
Oh, no, I gotta call Jack, I can't believe he's still doing this,
You know,,, she was walking around naked today,
- What? - I was in my office,
She was walking around naked, Is that a French thing?
Naked? She was naked-naked?
Naked-naked, I mean,,,
She's an exhibitionist and she used to be much worse,
She used to be a nympho, Don't worry, it's nothing personal,
She does it to everybody, It's like a first contact,
It's like dogs sniffing each other's ass,
Oh!
The bloody elevator, It always does this, Hang on one second,
Of course,
I'm sorry, You can't smoke in here,
Wait a minute, Is that a joint?
Yes, It's OK, I'm a psychiatrist, It's prescribed for my condition,
- I suffer from panic attacks, - Me, too, Big ones,
Oh,,,
Oh!
Sweetie, I don't think I can,,, with my dad in the living room,
I hear him, He's asleep, Don't you hear him?
He's knocked out,
- He's knocked out, - OK,
Oh,,,
They're back,
It's OK, It's OK, They're gonna go to sleep,
OK,
They're,,, They're,,, They're together in the bathroom,
So?
- No, - Oh, my God, no,
No!
OK,
It's stopped,
Well, I guess,,,
OK, Now they're brushing their teeth,
No, no, no! That's my electric toothbrush,
That's not yours, It's probably theirs, They brought it,
No, no, no, I know that one, I know the sound, That's my electric toothbrush,
What's that?
They're brushing their teeth while they're doing it, I guess,
No, no, no, They're doing something freaky with my toothbrush,
- No, - My toothbrush is off limits,
Do something, Go now,
I can't go, I can't see my sister doing it, OK?
Oh, stop it, It's your sister and your ex, You've seen them naked,
- Go in there, - I'm not going, I'm not going in there,
- I'm not going in there, - I'm supposed to go?
OK, They're done,
- They're done now, - OK,
I think they're done,
I mean,,,
- Yeah, they're done, - All right,
- OK, Good night, - All right,
Tomorrow, can you make it a priority to find them a place?
Of course, sweetie,
Mm,
Mm,,, mm,,,
Mingus,,, I hug you,
I love you, Mingus,
Aarrhh!
Sweetie, what is it?
I'm not a pig, I'm not a pig,
I know you're not a pig,
It was just a bad dream,
- Ha-ha! Mr, le Cowboy,,, - Morning, Daddy!
- ,,I'indien va te tuer! - Hi, Mingus, Good morning,
Hey, Mingus, How are you doing?
Food, Um-yum-yum-yum,
Your family's hungry and it's making me nervous,
They're like a reverse Waiting For Godot,
Wherever you look, there's always one just lurking in the corner,
- I like it, - It's nice,
Mm-hm,
Oh, Mingus, please, Coffee,
Yeah, I'll get it, I'll get it,
I love your T-shirt, Mingus,
Me, too, Mingus,
- Good? - Yeah, Yeah, yeah,
No American coffee,
Juice? No?
Oh, sausage juice, Please, no sausage juice, It's bad for you,
You two wife?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was divorced twice,
Er, marriage,,,
Marion not good'?
Marion,,,
Eh,,, free,
Marion very free,
Easy Rider,
Oh, Easy Rider, Rider, Rider,,, Like uh,,,
Yeah, I can see the resemblance to Peter Fonda,
Good! Peter Fonda,
Very funny,
You understand my humour?
- You understand me? - Oh, yes, Marion, Very much,,, Peter Fonda,
Vroom, vroom, vroom, Vroooom,
OK,
- Is good, eh? - Yeah,
Lucky me,
- Lucky me? - I'm lucky,,,
,,,fortunate,,,
,,,to be with your daughter,
It's a good thing,
What?
Um,,,
Your daughter nice,
- Nice? - Nice,
No, not "night", Nice,
- Nice, - Nice,
Very nice?
Ahh,
I like you, Mingus,
- Good man, Kitty-kitty-kiddee, - Uh,,, yeah,
Mingus,
Yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy-yoy,
Kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty,,,
Kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty,
Peter Fonda, Peter Fonda,
Kitty-kitty-Kitty,
I'll get the coffee,
Do you happen to have French family members visiting?
Yes, my dad and sister,
Well, your sister and some guy were in the elevator smoking pot,
And they were very rude,
I'm going to call the landlord,
All the noise all the time, We've had enough, The whole building complains about you,
- Cos my kids make too much noise? - Your son painted the mailbox,
What are you talking about? He's not even three,
I'm gonna have you evicted,
OK, fine,
I don't give a shit cos I have nothing to lose,
I have a brain tumor,
What?
Stage four,
I only have three months left, My family is visiting to say goodbye,
I'm so sorry, I didn't know,
Now you know, I only have three weeks left before I go into a coma, bitch,
but maybe you can have me evicted while I'm on my deathbed,
Is that what you want?
I am so sorry,
I had no idea,
Is there anything I can do?
My husband is a surgeon at Lennox Hill, you know,
Thank you, But it's too late,
- I saved you a croissant, - Thanks,
Everything OK?
Yeah, but I had a fight with that neighbour again,
In the elevator, she attacked me, I had to,,,
Made up some story to get out of it, It's like horrible,
- What was she mad about? - That,,,
The mailboxes again, Believe it or not,
Maybe you shouldn't let Lulu paint them,
It was an art project,
And, on top of it, it was Willow's idea,
- So now it's Willow's fault? - I'm not saying that,
- You just said it was Willow's fault, - No, I'm saying it was her idea,
She has a lot of ideas like that,
- Like doing funny things all the time, - She's a kid,
It's a nice project, It was nice, It's pretty, I have no problem with it,
But she has a dark side, She's always having crazy ideas,
- Dark? She's dark now? - Come on, admit it,
She's got a dark side and I believe she's gonna end up being goth,
She's borderline goth,
- A little black goth girl? - Yeah, Maybe she'll be the first black goth girl,
I'm sorry, It probably has a lot to do with how fucked-up your relationship with your,,,
- ex-wife was, - Wait a minute, How did we get there?
I mean, you act like you and Jack were just perfect,
- OK,,, - You want to go back to Jack? You want that?
Do you want the fighting and the bickering?
- Want me to call him? - Who's the bickerer now'?
- Oh, really? - Keep it down,
- I don't want to fight,,, - You came over here,
I love her to death, I'm just saying she has a few issues,
Maybe she'll be the next Francis Bacon,
You recognise yourself that she's always watching those death shows and all that,
Look who's,,, Issues, Who's got issues?
I'd like to show you some American toys so next time you come, you can bring me some,
Negative,
Marion? Marion'?
- Who is it? - No idea,
Hi, I'm Ron, I'm Bella's husband, She asked me to come by,
I'm Mingus, Bella? Why?
Well, your girlfriend, To see if there was anything I could do to help,
- With her condition, - Condition?
I have some very good oncologist friends at Sloan-Kettering,
It's always good to get a second opinion, A brain tumor is not necessarily fatal,
A brain tumor?
Honey, you have a brain tumor?
Oh, my God! No!
- I'm sorry, You didn't know'? - I didn't know,
I suspected something was wrong, All the yelling and screaming and bickering,
And her inability to make a decision about anything,
And the forgetfulness and the ﬂatulence, but,,,
You didn't tell me, You were protecting me? Just hiding it so I wouldn't be hurt,
You're an amazing woman, And now the limping,
I had to, I had to keep it,,, from you and the children,
- I'm so lucky, You're so amazing, - I'm sorry, honey,
Oh, hello,
- Partial paralysis? - Yes,
It's partial, It comes and goes, It comes and goes,
Oh, I feel so sick,
Do you have a CAT scan I could look at and locate the tumor?
No, No, they're at the hospital, I'm sorry,
- Sloan-Kettering? - No, in Paris,
Don't they CAT scan you regularly to monitor the growth?
Uh-uh, They don't, because I don't have health insurance and,,,
- You don't? - ,,there's no hope, anyway,
I don't have health insurance, sweetie,
You know, I could call your friends, A second opinion is a good idea,
- Yes, - But right now I feel really weak,
- And we need to talk, - Of course,
Thank you so much,
- I need to relax and talk to him, - Why don't you have some coffee with us?
- No, No, we have a lot of,,, - Ron, why don't you come in for some coffee?
My hand, it's back, It's coming back,
Yes, Ron,,, Ron, would you like some coffee?
- Uh,,, - No,
- Yeah, Come sit with us, Have some coffee, - We need to talk, sweetie, Remember'?
Yes, We can have our cancer talk,
Ron, would you like some coffee?
- I'd love some, - Great, great, great, Just come this way,
- Right this way, - But I have a brain tumor,
Yes, We will,,,
Oh,
Oh, Hello, I'm Rose,
- Like a rose, - I'm Ron,
Like um,,,
Yeah,,, coffee's over here, Ron,
- Ron, - Hi, man, I'm Manu, Nice meeting you,
- Right,,, - It's so nice your family's here,
- I know, - Such support,
They're very supportive,
You know what? You do have a CAT scan, Remember?
- No, I don't, - A month ago you slipped in the tub
and you insisted that we have a CAT scan done even though you never hit your head,
- It was before the tumor grew, - I know where it is, Sit tight,
- I left them at the hospital, - You don't have a fever? Follow my finger,
- OK, - Just with your eyes,
Now turn your head, That's good,
Got your CAT scan,
Let me take a quick,,,
Uh-huh,
Ah-ha,
Aha,
I can't lose you, I can't lose you,
- I don't really see anything at all, - What about this here?
- No, that's,,, - Those holes,
That's,,, That's actually normal,
If you didn't have these holes, you'd be severely retarded,
- They are pretty small, - Oh, this is interesting,
Is it bad?
Oh,,, actually, nothing, I mean,,,
- Oh, - Ron, are you OK?
- No, just keep them, - No, We're keeping them,
- It's,,, I need to keep them, - Why can't he keep them?
Because I'm attached to those,,,
It was before I was sick, I want to keep them healthy,
- The healthy pictures of me, - You know what?
Come to Marion's show, It's tonight, At the Susan Kellner Gallery,
Will the whole family be attending?
Yeah, The whole family will be there,
OK, I need to rest now,
- Bye, - Let me get this, please, OK,
- Insane behaviour, - Bye, Nice to meet you,
You were so fucking unsupportive,
I had to make up that lie because of the bitch,
She was gonna call the landlord on us,
Why did you do this to me?
A fucking brain tumor? A tumor?
So what? You know what? I might have a brain tumor,
You know'? Because I always have headaches and I'm throwing up all the time,
I could have a brain tumor!
Do you have to fake your death for us to keep the apartment'?
Marion, Lulu stinks,
I'm taking them with me to yoga, They want to see my gym,
- It's OK if we all come for lunch? You're sure? - Yeah, it's OK,
They want to come uptown and go to the park after, OK,
- All right, - I love you,
And they are gone,
Uh,,, Mingus,
Mingus, Yes, OK, I'll give it a shot,
I don't know,,,
No, I'm from Brooklyn,
Well, I'm originally from,,, No, no, no,
When people hear "Brooklyn", they think “he's tough",
No, I'm from Park Slope, From the punky, bitch side of Brooklyn,
You sure I can call you that'?
Ba rack
You,,, You,,, Hawaii, That's right, That's right,
So when you were a kid and you got mad at people,
did you go, "Hey, I'm from Hawaii, Don't fuck with me, I'm from Hawaii,"
You can't say that, right? It's the same as Park Slope,
Did the gangs throw coconuts? I mean,,,
Well, don't get sensitive,
Yes, I'm sure Hawaii was rough,
I believe you, There was rocks in your sand,
You write, too?
I'm sure they would love to put one of your articles in the Voice,
What do you write about?
Plants?
Gazing towards the sky,
And one more,
Coming back the way we came,
Bending the knee, Hands come up,
Exhale, Hands to heart centre,
Deep breath in, Rise,
Turn to face the front,
Fingers come down,
Foot comes back, And let's press right back into Down Dog,
Deep breath in and out,
- Rose, - Quoi?
Two,
What are you eating, Mingus?
It's a frittata,
I guess it's a funny frittata, huh?
How's your midday wine, Jeannot?
Hey!
What you doin' here, man? I thought we lost you to Washington?
- I'm in town doing a radio interview, - OK, OK,
Justin, I want you to meet my girlfriend, Marion,
Oh! Oh, Justin, so nice to finally meet you,
And this is her family, Jeannot,
Rose,
- Hello, - And Rose's boyfriend, Manu,
- Nice to meet you, - Nice to meet you, too,
Hey, I'm doing my radio show in about an hour,
- Why don't you come on the air? - I'm catching the 4:20 to DC,
Actually, I meant to call you about Barack's visit to NY,
To have him on my show?
- Slow down there a bit, - OK, OK,
No, but he's doing a press conference and I think I can get you in,
Get outta here!
- No? - Oh, sweetie, that's wonderful,
- Good Obama, - Thanks,
He's so good-looking, So much better looking than Sarkozy,
Sorry,
Obama,,,
- Not really a socialist, - No?
Well, if I may say so,
you did a fucking great job in Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle,
That was totally hysterical,
- It was so fucking funny, - That's not him, Could you sit down?
- It's OK, - Justin, one thing,
I did not think that Obama he deserve to win the Nobel Peace Prize,
Do you agree or not?
I'm sorry, She doesn't know what she's talking about,
- No, it's OK, - I do,
It's a free country, Everyone's entitled to their own opinion,
- Thank you, - Hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm sorry about that,
I just met them, You know how it is, Girlfriend's family's come for the weekend,
- It's crazy, - It's crazy,
- What the fuck? - It's crazy, I know,
She's not normally like this,
I've gotta catch my train,
- You know how it is, - Crazy,
- I'm sorry, - You're gonna call me about this interview'?
Yep, I should really get going,
- All right, - Great to see you,
I'm gonna be waiting by the phone,
- I'm on Facebook, - Mm-hm,
Bye, Kumar,
It's not fucking Kumar,
- Can I talk to you for a minute? - OK,
- I want 'em out, - What?
I want 'em out,
OK, you want them out? Yes, I agree, They're out,
My sister is out, She's out of her mind, She's crazy, I don't want to see her and this guy,
- They're out, - You don't hear me, They all gotta go,
What do you mean? Even my dad?
Even your dad, Yes, your dad,
He came all the way from Paris - he hates ﬂying - to see me and Lulu,
- He can't go, - Hey, hey,
How could you argue with your sister right there?
I get to meet the next black president?
Was I supposed to let her kill me right on the spot?
- Yes, - No, I don't want to make you look bad,
I'm always a supportive girlfriend, I've always supported you,
What the fuck? Every time somebody comes from one of your jobs,
I'm like, "Hey, How you doing? Nice to meet you,"
Let's compromise, OK? Relationships are about compromise,
You always say that, Manu and my sister, they can, like, fuck themselves
everywhere in New York,
OK? But my dad stays,
Please, I can't put him in a hotel, He'll have a breakdown, He'll die,
Please, My dad, Just my dad,
- All right, Your dad can stay, OK, - Thank you,
I'm so sorry,
Yeah, It'll be fine,
- Bye, Ming, - See you later,
So, what, you can't make it tonight?
All right, I'll come pick them up,
Taxi!
All right, We're back,
Sir, can you turn it up? It's my boyfriend on the radio,
- Thank you, - You know, when I used to think of the French,
I used to think of Degas, Renoir,,,
the surrealists,
But now when I think of the French I think of freaky sex with electric toothbrushes,
Don't ask, They're killing me, Oh, we've got a call,
Cynthia from Williamsburg, How's it going, Cynthia?
Hey, I just want to say I love your show, baby,
I love it so much that my boyfriend is getting kind of jealous,
OK,,, baby,
Can you turn that up a little more?
- So any thoughts, Cynthia? - You really wanna know my thoughts?
Maybe not live on the radio,
- Some X-rated thoughts, huh? - Mm, Always when I think of you, baby,
Nice to know somebody's thinking X-rated of me,
I was sad to find out that you have a nice little French girlfriend,
Sad that you're sad, but yes,
- Bitch, - That's how it is,
So, Cynthia, do you have anything you want to share? Any political views,
No, but if you ever need a pair of free jeans, pop into the Gap,
You know the one on Klondike? And ask for Cynthia,
Oh, OK, You know what? I just might do that,
- Yeah, - I need some jeans, I need some jeans,
I'm not gonna tell you when but it just might happen,
All right, Time for the news, See you later, Cynthia,
The protester known as the Oak Fairy has fallen from his tree in Central Park,
Though he could not ﬂy as many of his supporters believed,
he is in a stable condition with a broken foot and we expect a statement soon,
Look, Marion, I have some grass, Nobody knows it's not from Central Park,
What's happening with the costumes?
Their teacher said they asked for blood, Lulu is a dead bunny,
- Guys, no dead anything, - But I like being a dead princess,
OK, I know you love the dead, the vampires and stuff,
but being dead is not cool,
- Dead people rot, right? OK? Yes, - Yeah,
And vampires - I know a bunch of cute guys played them in movies,
but I promise you it's not cool, OK?
You know what comes out of a vampire's tush? Rotten digested blood,
- Ew! - Ew! Yeah, exactly,
So you don't want to be a dead person, Because death is very sad and lonely,
And one day you're gonna see your papa die and you're gonna be very, very sad,
All right? So what's cool is to be alive and happy,
OK? OK?
So let's go home and clean this up, OK?
- No dead anything, - Er,,, Miss Marion?
- Yes? - I don't think you should do it,
- What? - Sell your soul,
Oh, it's OK, It's fine,
But suppose the person who buys it is a really bad man, you know?
My gallerist's promised me she's not gonna sell my soul to the devil,
Just a rich motherfucker, And remember, I need some money to pay you,
OK, say no more,
We are all under economic pressure,
- I understand, OK, - OK,
- All right, - Bye,
- Good luck with your uncle, - Thank you,
Come in,
- Please don't use my family in your show, - I was being nice and respectful,
all things considered,
- You use ex-boyfriends in your show, - That's different,
Are you an alcoholic?
There's a pair of jeans for your skinny black ass,
I'm saving you a trip to The Gap,
I was never gonna call that girl up, I was never going by The Gap,
But thanks for the jeans,
- OK, you're welcome, - Appreciate it,
You know, I have to find a dress and I think I still have hives from the yoghurt,
No, no, no hives, But your boobs have been getting a little bigger,
- I know, they hurt, I don't know why, - Oh, yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
- Keep doing that, - What?
Oh, I like that, I like that, That's like that,,,
You know what? Why don't you send your dad with the kids to the park?
Give us a little time,
You would let our kids with my dad, who you were about to evict, just to get some?
- Hell, yeah, - Er,,, Well, let me talk to him,
No, no, no, Are you kidding me?
- I gonna talk to my dad first, - OK,
Hello?
OK, kids, Kids, we're going to the Halloween fair,
- Halloween fair'? - And you know who you're going with?
Auntie and Grandpa,
- Bye! - Au revoir,
- Bye, Mingus, - Take care, Take care,
Have fun,
Sweetie, Manu has been deported back to Paris,
You'll never have to see him again, ever,
Whoa! How did you do that?
Tomorrow Rose,
- You really like me, - Mm-hm,
Come on,
Oh!
Forgot something,
I'm here to fix the buzzer,
Buzzer, Sweetie,
OK, I'll handle it,
Could you come back a little later?
No, It won't be possible for another two weeks, at least,
No, no, no, We can't wait two weeks,
- It wakes up the kids every time, - I got,,, Hold on, I got it,
Please,
Hiya,
This system hasn't been updated since the Prohi-bish,
- How long is it gonna take, do you think? - About two hours, maybe three,
- Really? - You don't want me to do it?
- I just have a great party to attend, - No, it's OK, Just do it,
Just do it, it's fine, It's fine,
Looks like my services are no longer needed here, so,,,
OK, I'm gonna go early so I can check everything's all right,
- Are you OK bringing everyone? - Yeah,
- OK, - Bye,
- Hey, can I have something to drink? - Yeah, what do you want?
Chai latte, low-fat milk,
One sugar,
OK,
I hope it sells, These prints cost me a fortune,
I hope so too, or this place will become a banana republic in no time,
The good news is I think we've got a taker for the soul,
- Really? Who is it? - Anonymous party,
- Anonymous? - Anonymous party, A direct deposit to the,,,
- Whoo-hoo! We're here, - Everything OK?
How are you, Mingus? Nice to see you,
- I left a diaper bag in the taxi, - Oh, no,
- Would your dad ever key a car? - Of course not, Impossible,
There's a limo driver outside who wants to press charges,
Well, that's,,, Really? I'll deal with it later,
Oh, thank you so much for coming,
We'll take any occasion to see our granddaughter,
- Hello, Willow, - Hi, Grandma, Hi, Grandpa,
Thank you for coming,
Jeannot, my parents, Carol and Lee,
Mingus family!
- Kiss, - You gotta kiss him or he gets mad,
- That's my mother, No tongue, - Kiss!
You guys have a lot in common, You're both involved in the '60s,
- I love Last Poets, - No way! They were friends of ours,
OK, shall we look at the pictures?
- It's going well, no? - I think so, it's crazy,
- Hello, - Hello,
There's somebody important I need you to meet, Come here,
So you know I'm a psychologist, too, But my specialty is that I work with children,
Are you familiar with the work of Françoise Dolto?
Oh, my God, I wrote my dissertation on Dolto at the Sorbonne,
- What sign are you? - I'm fish,
Pisces, Insightful, sensitive to the plights of others,
Oh, my God, So much,
You know, I go to the buffet now to get something to drink,
Could I,,, Do you want something?
- I'd love a glass of white wine, - Two,
- It's good, huh? - Yeah,
- Her sister's lovely, - It's hard to believe she's Marion's sister,
Would you back off? This is her night,
Well, clearly she's been very busy with her nights,
- It's over ten years of pictures, - Carol!
Lee! Come here,
It's funny,
Carol,
- It's going good, no? - No, no, no, no,
No, it's not going good, I can't sell a thing, Nothing has sold,
- What? - I think with the subject matter,
people were expecting something sexier,
Something, I don't know,
Sexier? But I never sleep naked, Who does?
- Do you sleep naked? - No,
Oh, this is good, No, no, no, John Kelly's here,
I need you to go talk to him,
- The John Kelly? - Yes,
- Oh, my God, he can be so vicious, - I know, Exactly,
That's why I need you to bring your A-game,
I think,,,
Yes?
- I like it, - Great,
- Thanks, Thank you, - Why did you use yourself as a subject?
I know myself pretty well, first of all,
And I thought through a study of the microcosm I could start to understand others,
- So you're saying you're universal? - No, I wouldn't say I'm universal,
You're not writing that, are you? It's so pretentious, Please don't write that,
What I'm saying is I'm probably too shy to approach strangers
and I was genuinely interested in seeing how a relationship evolves
through time,
That's,,,
So you're trying to place your work in the same realm as
people like Cindy Sherman and Nan Goldin,
- Sophie Calle, - Well, they're amazing,
- Who wouldn't,,,'? - Amazing,
- Yeah, amazing, Brilliant,
This is,,, this is so cute,
- I like the theme, - Great,
More than the execution,
OK,
These photos are sort of erm,,,
- ,,mundane, - Mundane,
They're mundane, but at the same time they're pretty,
- OK, OK, - Yeah,
That's not bad,
- It was nice meeting you, - Thank you,
Thank you so much for coming, I'm happy you enjoyed the show,
No, it's OK, If you hate the show you can say it, It's fine,
I can take it, Totally fine,
I'm not, you know, one of those people that can't take criticism,
But you know what? What's good is for the truth to come out
and you can just say it - you hate it, You hate my show,
You know what? It's OK, because I want to tell you something,
Everyone hates you, In the art world, everyone hates you,
Even outside of the art world everyone hates you, because you're an asshole,
- Everyone? - If I didn't have a kid, I would snap your neck,
And if I could I would take every single picture and shove it,,,
Everything OK here?
- Yeah,,, - OK, Thank you,
This is so good,
- All right, - I'll take care of it,
I think it's all part of,,, It almost becomes performance at this stage,
- She's insane, - Oh,
And that's part of the whole theme,
Bye,
Text me,
- Miss? - Ah,
- Where are you from? - From Rome in Italy,
I have some grass from Central Park, Do you want to bring some back to your country?
- It's only 20 bucks, - Excuse me,
No, No, thank you, Where are your parents?
- Excuse me, is she bothering you? - No, You are the father?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Willow, what are you doing?
They're from Europe like Lulu's uncle, They want some grass to bring back home,
Could you excuse us? It's not what you think,
I'm raising money to have more bunnies at school,
I'll get you bunnies, OK? I'll get you all the bunnies you want,
It's a school project,
School project,
Are you sure you don't have a battery charger? The cord thing?
- Where have you been? - I was here,
I found the kids trying to sell grass from Central Park to some Italian lady,
- Well, so,,, I'm running out of battery, - Hey, fuck the battery, OK?
Do you understand that I told the court
that I would provide a life filled with love, laughter and ﬂuffy animals?
What do you think will happen when they find out she's imitating drug dealers,
- that your ex invited into our home? - OK, I'm sorry,
The guy's on an airplane right now, OK?
I,,, There's nothing else I can do,
Sweetie, this whole evening is turning into a horrible disaster for me,
I've sold nothing, Nothing,
- It's over, - Marion? I need you,
- She's busy, - I have to go,
I have to go, sweetie,
- God, - Very exciting announcement to make,
- Nothing's sold? - Just the soul,
Come on,
Everyone, please step up, Thank you, I've a very exciting announcement to make,
Tonight we have sold the soul of Marion Dupré to the highest bidder for $5,000,
Bravo, Bravissimo,
And date,,, date it, please,
It's been notarized,
I am delighted to be officially soulless as of this day of October 31st,
Er,,, I thought my soul was worth at least $10,000,
But I guess in these times of economic turmoil I am,,,
- Lucky, fortunate, - ,,fortunate, yes, that it's sold at all,
- Yes, exactly, - Who bought it?
- Anonymous, - Wow,
Thank you,
The soulless Marion Dupré,
- She's not my,,, - It's a failure,
She sold her soul, but no-one's buying anything else,
- She's a bad mother, - Doesn't even show her tits,
I'd rather buy toilet paper than her pictures,
Oh, Marion, Hi, Did we miss the show? Are you OK?
- No, - Marion, I just want to say,
that you are a talented artist and you will be remembered,
I can't breathe, I'm suffocating,
- Oh, - Oh, my God, This is it,
We should get in and buy a few pictures, They're gonna be worth a fortune very soon,
- Did you hear that? Let's go in, - Go,
Your father told me about your mom,
- You never told us, - I don't like to talk about it,
You know, in our village, when we cannot let go of someone who died,,,
we need to find a trapped animal and release it,
Really?
You feel different today,
Different how?
Susan, just cut the anonymous crap,
I don't believe you, Just give me his number,
Someone picked up the certificate, so you have something,
Something for him, like a number or something,
Just give me his name,
I don't care about the good news, Give it to me now,
My phone is running out of battery,
I'll have to call from a public phone and catch gonorrhea of the masses,
Is that what you want?
Give it to me!
I just wanted to give you instructions on how my soul works,
I see, Like er,,,
Like an instruction manual?
Yeah, to make sure you get maximum return on your investment,
My soul is quite complicated and brought me many problems,
- Oh, - Which is why I was willing to sell it,
I see,
You're the actor Vincent Gallo, right?
Yeah, the actor, the director, the poet,
the fashion model, motorcycle racer, legend, and the owner of your soul,
Yes, Vincent Gallo, Me,
Why did you buy my soul?
Why did you sell your soul?
It's sort of a conceptual statement,
- Because I don't believe in the soul, - You don't believe?
Then why er,,, did we have to meet here today?
I was just curious to know why you bought it,
- I just want to know why, - That's nice,
And you're sure you don't believe in the soul, right? You're sure it doesn't exist?
Yes,
Pick up, pick up, You have children!
You have to pick up the phone, They could be hurt or dead,
Pick up the phone,
Goes straight to voice-mail, Where is she?
I can't find her, I mean, the show was a success,
She sold everything,,, suddenly, It's all gone,
Mingus, do you have ice for my feet, please?
Mingus,,, Do you have ice for my feet? Please, Mingus,
- Why don't you get it yourself? - OK,
By the way, why do you laugh every time you say my name?
Oh, Mingus, please don't be mad, It was a stupid joke between me and Manu,
Your name, it rhymes with cunnilingus, And in French,,,
In English too!
OK,
Thank you, it all makes sense now, Mingus, cunnilingus!
- Oh, yeah, Yes, - Yes!
"Oh, Mingus, can you get me some ice?"
"Mingus, can you get the ketchup?"
“Mingus, can you get my shoe?"
Can you remind me again what you do for a living?
- I,,, - You're a shrink,
For kids,
That is so scary,
Sick!
If there's a tiny little chance that it does exist,,,
I think it's a good idea that I have a back-up, you know?
A sort of,,, "in case I need it",,, soul,
Well, let's say the soul does exist,
it's very unlikely you can just sell it by signing a little piece of paper, Right?
L,,, I disagree with you,
The concept of a soul is a little absurd,
But the idea of trading it, selling it,
is no more absurd than the idea that the soul exists,
- Do you miss your soul? - Of course not,
- Prrrh! No, - "Prrh!" Yeah,
OK, I'm just trying to think if I,,, if I lost my soul, how would that feel?
I mean, that's er,,, I couldn't imagine that,
I might start to cry,
Where is er,,, the contract?
Someone picked it up at the gallery, so you,,,
Where is it?
- Why do you ask? - I need it back, Give it to me back,
I know you sent the money already to the bank,
but I can make you a chèque right now, and you give it back to me,
And,,,
It's no big deal, right?
No, It's not for sale,
Not for any price, not for anything,
- I'm sorry, - But it's mine,
No, You decided to sell it,
I decided to buy it and now it's mine,
Please tell me where it is, That it's in a safe place,
It's in a safe place, baby,
It's very safe, It's in a very, very safe place,
My favourite place,
It's in a little suede pouch, in the color brown,
Tiny little pouch, It's rolled up, placed in the pouch,
And I keep it right here,
In my groin area,
Safe, protected,
You're not dead, I said I wasn't gonna get mad,
But you know what?
Where have you been?
I'm sorry I couldn't call, my phone ran out of battery,
And then I was trying to get my soul back, and,,,
- He ate it, - Who ate what?
Vincent Gallo,
Vincent Gallo? So that's where you've been?
Well, first I got a massage because I was tense, OK?
And then I finally found out who was the anonymous person who bought my soul,
so I called and we had a meeting, and it was Vincent Gallo,
And then,,, and then I,,, tried to negotiate with him, my soul back,
And the paper, he had the certificate that I signed,
I just want it back, not because I believe in the soul,
but because I believe something was wrong with me ever since I signed that paper,
So he had it in a little area he said, like in a suede pouch, next to his groin area, you know?
I lunged at him and I grabbed the pouch and I punched him in the face,
And then he punched me in the stomach,
and then we punched back and forth and then,,,
We,,, we fell to the ﬂoor and then he grabbed it,
And he ate it,
So you spent all night in Vincent Gallo's pants, on the ﬂoor?
- No, that's not what you think,,, - That's what you just said!
No, that's not at all what I just said, I said he had my soul in his underwear,
- OK? It's very different, - No, it's not fucking different!
You've gone crazy, Ever since your family got here you've become another person,
Now, the question is, is this who you really are and you've been hiding it from me?
Or is this just some isolated incident that will never happen again?
What is it? Psycho bitch,,, not psycho bitch?
I'm not a psycho bitch, sweetie,
I was really trying to get my soul back and it was in his underwear,
And I didn't touch his penis,
- How's Lulu? - You know what?
Why don't you check yourself?
He was crying, he missed his mommy,
Mommy left without saying anything,
- He's OK? - He's fine, He's in our bed,
I'm gonna go sleep in my office,
- You don't have to do that, It's stupid, - No, no, I,,,
It's stupid, Nothing happened, Nothing really,,,
In fairy tales, they tell you they lived happily ever after,
They never tell you the rest of the story for a very good reason,
No more dragons to slay after the happy ending,
Life begins, and that's way harder to handle than any dragon,
But then again you can end up with the most precious gift in the whole world,
You know why I don't believe in the soul?
Because the soul would probably mean an afterlife,
And if there was something, my mom would have tried to communicate with me somehow,
Even though she knows better than to contact me when I'm home alone at night,
Come in,
Hey, sweetie, Wanna come with us to Central Park?
No, Gotta do my taxes,
Taxes in November?
Yeah, I'm looking forward to it,
Could you close the door?
You know what, if we broke up, I would just wake up in the morning,
I'd get my coffee and I'd be on my way,
No more organic crap, Nothing organic,
The day we break up I'm gonna start barbecuing at this place, I tell you that,
I can go to the Knick game, and I could hang with my boys,
And I could,,, you know, a few women,
Multiple women, Hey, you got something on you,
Somebody needs to help you out there,
I'd come back and I'd be refreshed from getting this pussy,
And then,,, You don't mind if I say pussy, right?
I mean, you know, the options are unbelievable,
Who am I kidding'?
Girls you meet at bars,,,
Eating cheeseburgers at two in the morning,
They wanna talk after sex,
“What are you thinking?“
“When you were in me, you were going crazy, How did it feel?"
“What's your sign?“
My sign is, Shut the fuck up, That's my sign,
I mean,,,
Marion's difficult,,,
But I like her,
She's an animal lover,
Yes, I know Hitler loved animals too, but,,,
I mean, she cooks and,,, Oh, my God, she gives an amazing,,,
You don't even understand it,
If you ever,,, If we ever break up and you get the chance,,,
You have my blessing,
Not that you need my blessing,
I'm sure if I left her with you for five minutes she'd be on her fucking knees,
Was I cold? She hates cold,
You know, I hate cold,
Marion's a lot of things but she's never cold,
Belvedere Castle,
You know, I'm not you, This is why I'm not the President,
I'm not really big on the public, romantic reconciliations, not my thing,
But I'm gonna wait for her to get back, and then I'm gonna tell her how I feel,
You know, I gotta go take a piss,
When I get back I wanna hear about you and Michelle, OK?
All right, My man,
All right, Let's do this,
Lift the seat,
Shit,
Oh, shit,
Papa! Rose!
Er,,, Miss, you can't do that, Miss!
- Marion! - Miss!
- Miss! Miss! - I just have to free that pigeon,
- What's going on? - I don't know, The lady's crazy,
She just started climbing up there,
Hey, little guy,
- What's going on? - I can't do it,
It's not you, It's your hormones!
- I'm OK, sweetie, - We're gonna have a little Obama,
- What? - Aah, shit,
We got a trespasser, I need backup,
Got it!
Ah! No!
Aaargh! No!
Oh!
If you live your life with one person only, one day they'll be gone or you'll be gone,
And one of you will be left all alone in the cold world,
The family we are born in eventually vanishes,
By then you've created your own family if you're lucky,
First you have to choose the person you'll build this family with,
and stick to it as much as possible,
How many tries do you get before you strike out?
When my mother died, just a few hours before the end,
she looked into my eyes and she had the expression of a little girl
who didn't know what was happening to her,
The same as when Lulu was born - something totally pure,
So I guess we can do all the growing up we can,,,
In the end, at the core, we stay the same,
But before that sad ending that awaits all of us,,,
maybe we can share beautiful, ephemeral moments with the people we love,
So, Mommy, Daddy, Papi and Auntie ended up in jail,
But not for long, It all worked out in the end,
Then seven months later,,, you were born,
Grandpa moved to New York so he could be close to all of us,
and that's also when Auntie Rose met Uncle Bob,
He was the policeman that threw us all in jail,
And luckily, they moved to Paris,
What you doing'?
I was just explaining to her what happened before she was born,
- No crazy stuff, right? - Of course not,
Just a love story with a happy ending,
♪ HOLLIE COOK: Body Beat
♪ It's been so long since I've been home
I Coming me some back
♪ My body beats and I'm feeling raw
♪ Too much space where you belong
♪ Somewhere dark and warm
♪ These feelings are right to be wrong
♪ Explain now
♪ It's been so long since I've been home
♪ I've been missing you from the start
♪ My body beats and I'm feeling raw
♪ Huh! Stick tight, angel
♪ Too much places I have fought ♪ Where?
♪ Playing the game, scoring my name
♪ Couldn't have been so wrong
♪ Too much space where you belong
♪ Somewhere dark and warm
♪ These feelings are right to be wrong
♪ Explain now
♪ It's been so long since I've been home
♪ I've been missing you from the start
♪ My body beats and I'm feeling raw
♪ Huh! Stick tight, angel
♪ Too much places I have fought ♪ Where?
♪ Playing the game, scoring my name
♪ Couldn't have been so wrong
♪ It couldn't have been so wrong