You're it!
Whoa!
Now you're it,
Gotcha, Now you're it,
You're it,
Great, more Roman soldiers being paraded into the city,
As long as they stay in the city,
Let's head over there, I'm tired of all this running around,
Hey! Wait!
Huh?
Hmm,
Ah! Much better, The colors of Rome,
Whoa, Thanks for the gift, Dad,
Uh, I mean, Dominus,
Move aside! Officer Cyrius Maximus,
Good to see you're making yourself at home in Capernaum,
It's not Rome,
But the people are very,,, generous,
Well, we're doing our best to make it inhabitable,
And you must be Hilarius,
I have been known to crack a joke or two,
- I have something for you, - Wow, two presents?
Looks like Saturnalia came early this year,
I love it,
Can I go patrol? Please?
Just be home by dinner, We're having my favorite,
- Please! - Fish,
I see I've gotten two officers for the price of one,
Twenty-eight, 29, 30,
Abby? Abby!
Abby, where are you?
I should've stayed home and practiced my flute,
I don't like this game, Abby,
It's scary, You could be anywhere,
Yeah, That's how you play Hide-and-Seek, Joshua,
Hey, dummy, She's over there,
That's cheating,
Who are you?
- Besides a rat, - How dare you?
I am Hilarius Maximus, Just moved into town,
My father is Cyrius Maximus, a centurion for the Roman Empire,
And you're already a soldier?
Uh,,,
- Yes, - Oh, I confess, it was me,
I didn't look both ways before crossing the street--
- I don't think he's here for that, Joshua, - Oh,
But I should play with you to make sure you're not doing anything illegal,
It was just a game of Hide-and-Seek,
I love this game,
Go hide,
One, two, 30,
Tell me where she is!
Hey! That's not how you're supposed to play,
Agree to disagree,
See? Even Sheep knows how to play,
Play what, now?
Let's play something else,
Ooh! How about Roam the Desert?
That game takes forever,
I'll play any game with the word "Rome,"
Come on, sea, Part!
Please,
Whoosh! My waves have parted,
But you'd better hurry and cross, I don't usually do this,
Move, I'm building an aqueduct here,
But I'm Moses,
Well, I'm a soldier,
And Roman soldiers were here before the Moses,
Mm, that sentence is off for a couple of reasons,
I wish they'd play Noah's Ark,
A sheep gets lonely,
This is fun, right?
We're just playing "pretend,"
Let's play something else,
This game is called Cross the Quicksand,
You just grab whatever you can and use it to get to the other side,
Last one across loses,
It's fun to have someone else play this with us, so I don't lose every time,
Ew,
I demand that one of you carry me,
Nope, That's not the game,
Then I declare this side the winning side,
You can do that?
If you're the one with the sword,
So all I need is a sword? Got it,
You need to stop taking my social commentary as life advice,
Well, well, What's for sale today?
I've got it all today, my good man,
I've got fresh fish straight from the Galilee, beautiful jewelry,
This pendant's lineage can be traced to the Maccabees,
Oh, and this rock,
My youngest will love it,
He never gets nice things,
- Aw, poor baby, - Isn't Joshua the youngest?
That will be five twigs,
- Let me see what I can do, - Wait just a minute,
Yes?
Hey!
This isn't up to regulation,
I'm gonna have to confiscate it,
And did you report these earnings to your tax representative?
Didn't think so,
You know what? Give him all your twigs, Joshua, Let's go,
But you're acting like those grow on trees,
Ha, Looks like I won,
Yeah, soldiers always do,
Fine,
What do you want?
I want you to stop being mean,
And I want you to stop changing the rules just because you're a Roman soldier,
But I am a Roman soldier, That's what we do,
Then this time I'll be the Roman soldier,
You can't be a Roman soldier, You're not a man,
Neither are you,
- Wha,,, - Abby,
You're,,, You're not Roman,
But aren't we just "playing pretend"?
Okay, sure, how bad could it be?
- Give me the helmet, - What?
The helmet, Hilarius,
- Uh,,, - Hmm,
Who's ready to play Market?
- Okay, are you ready? - Huh, yeah,
I think I can handle a Roman soldier,
Remember, it's harder when you're not one, Just do as she asks,
Hmm, show me what garbage you're selling today,
I'll decide if it's worth anything,
Well, I have some pots forged from clay--
- Boring, - Oh, and a facial mud mask
from the Dead Sea,
Hmm, let's see,
Do you have anything, I don't know, not made of dirt?
Uh,,,
What about your cloak?
That's not for sale,
Since when does that matter to me?
Talking back to soldiers only makes it worse,
This isn't fun anymore,
Oh, no, are you going to cry?
Don't do that, then I'll cry,
We're sorry,
Yeah, we're sorry,
We didn't mean anything,
So, what do you want to play instead?
Gladiators?
What if we just look for shapes in the clouds?
Ooh! I love nonthreatening activities,
Hey, Sheep, what do you see in the clouds?
Me as a baby,
Me as a grown-up,
Me as a cloud,
What do you see?
Centuries of human suffering
finally being touched by the warm light of love,
Hey, Pigeon, if you don't see anything, you can just say so,
There's a snake with a long neck,
Huh? Isn't that what a snake is?
I see a lion with wings,
Well, I see a scared little boy,
And we see you, Joshua,
Ooh! That one's shaped like my dad,
- Hilarius, - Sounds like him too,
Hilarius!
Hilarius Maximus!
Um, we better go, Shalom, Hilarius,
- Dominus, - What were you doing?
Just, uh,,,
infiltrating,
Hmm,
Please, sir, we don't want any more trouble,
Huh?
Just,,, don't lose it next time,
Hilarius!