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Maxwell,
Max,
Max!
The time has come,
Don't let me down,
Hey, Maxwell?
- Hey, - Hey, uh, what,,,?
What are you doing?
Do you know where Arthur is buried?
- Arthur? - Yeah,
Wait, Dad?
No, the dog!
- You mean Tony? - Yes,
Yeah, wait, what,,, what did I say?
- You said Arthur, - Are you sure?
I'm pretty sure I said Tony,
Yeah, well you didn't,
God,
- Hey, - Hey,
Hey, what are you,,, why are you trying to dig up Tony?
Dad,,, Dad asked me to, at the hospital,
It was one of the last things he asked me to do,
Ah, okay, um,
Well, uh,
you know, why don't the two of us
just come out later and we can look together?
You know, when it's not raining,
Come on,
Okay, yeah, that's fine,
All right, well,
Let me just fill these holes in real quick,
Okay, well do you want my help, or,,,
No, no, it's fine,
I need,,, I just,,, I know where everything goes, you know?
All right, well, you're gonna come in?
- Yes, - Okay,
- I'll see you inside? - Okay,
I'll get you a towel,
- Coffee? - Please,
Wanna tell me what that was out there?
Um, it was his last wish,
Okay, well, I'm just,,,
you know better than most of us that he was
a bit out of it toward the end there, so,
And what is this, I mean, are you wearing the same clothes
that you were wearing at his funeral yesterday?
- It's laundry day, - I mean, I'm not a doctor
or anything, but this looks a bit like
a breakdown,
What exactly is that supposed to mean?
Don't tell people I had a breakdown, okay?
I have responsibilities,
Look, I'm just a little worried about you,
okay?
Will you close your eyes?
- Hard pass, - Please close your eyes,
Okay,
Your guitar,
I found it in the basement with all your other old instruments,
- Okay? - Isn't it exciting?
I thought maybe you could, you know, like,
start playing again, and call your old bandmates
from high school and,,,
- Yeah, sure, - ,,,get back together,
With work and everything going on with Dad,
and everything else, I'll just start writing songs again,
Exactly, that's what I'm saying, you should,
Oh, but I was gonna open a restaurant,
and I have to finish writing my novel,
and of course I'm running for mayor, so,
All right, well I hope all that goes really well for you,
- Thank you, - Very funny, you're so busy,
- Mr, Busy, - I am busy,
Look, Dad's lawyer's gonna be here later this afternoon,
I have some things I gotta get done beforehand, okay?
We're gonna do the lawyer thing without Jenna?
We're gonna meet with the family lawyer
- without our sister? - I know, I feel bad,
but what am I supposed to do?
She was off the grid, by the time I got in touch
with her, tomorrow's the earliest she can get back,
Okay,
So, do me a favor and just change,
- Me change? - Yeah,
Look at you,
I'm gonna change, you know I'm gonna change,
I'm saying it because I don't know if you will change,
I do not know that you're gonna change,
We'll both change then, how about that?
Just maybe give it a tickle,
Now, let's get to the crux of the matter,
- Sure, - Did I say that correctly?
"Arthur Grant," that's your father,
"Arthur Grant endowed a fund specifically to preserve
a habitat in which a species lives
and named himself," this is interesting,
"he named himself the Chairman
of the North American Sloth Fund,"
- "Soft funds"? - No, no, no, Sloth Fund,
- The North American Sloth Fund, - "Soft fund"?
- Sloth, Sloth Fund, - Slaw, Slaw Fund,
- There's no need to get loud, - Slaw Fund, Slaw Fund,
Sloth Fund,
The North American sloth is a subspecies of sloth
that lives in North America
whose ranks have been decimated by modernity,
I'm sorry, there are sloths here in North America?
Yeah, but where else would a North American sloth be?
Do you know what I mean?
- Ah, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, - I'm sorry, can you tell me
- where this preserve is? - The land adjacent
to this property here is the largest habitat
for sloths living here, and your dad was into it,
so he put all of his time and energy into
making this land preserve happen,
which gets me to my final point:
Your father had no more money left,
Wait, what? I'm sorry, what about all his investments?
He burned through those assets like left and right,
Honestly, I didn't wanna bring this up today,
but this home, he took a reverse mortgage on this home,
- What is a reverse mortgage? - The bank owns this home,
Okay, I'm sorry, this is a little shocking
- for us to hear, we had no idea, - Yeah, mm-hm, of course,
- He has no assets left? - He has none,
All of this to say, you're gonna need to add
another $10,000 to the fund
- by the end of this month, - By the end of this month?
- That's,,, that's next week, - That is next week,
Um, that is true, about, yeah, that's true,
Um, okay, okay,
What happens,,, can I just ask a question?
- Hit me, - What happens
if the fund closes, hypothetically?
If this fund closes? I mean, if the fund closes,
you know, it goes back into public land,
and like, they'll put a strip mall on it,
and the sloths are gone,
But, um, which kind of gets to all this
to finalize and say,,, I mean, I threw a lot at you guys,
but I just wanna, like, if you,,,
you know, on a personal note,
if we can just land here,
is that, um,
your father,
he meant a lot to me,
and, uh, he was truly a mentor to me,
- Uh-huh, - And, um,,,
I don't know how to say this, but in, like,
the legal communities, you know, he was like a real,,,
- You need to take that? - Good, finish, please,
I'm just like in the middle of this thing,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, go, go, go,
He, like,,, God, what was it?
Like, in the legal community,,, take it if you need to take it,
- I just,,, I do need to take it,,, - Okay, let me,,, let me just
- finish this, let me finish,,, - Go ahead,
In the legal community, he was like a lion,
- Wow, thank you, - You know what I mean?
I do, I do, I'm sorry, I do have to take this,
- Thank you so much,,, - Barney, thank you,
- I'm,,, okay, thank you, - Thank you,
- I'm Barney, that's Max, - Barney,
Oh, I've been meaning to ask you this,
Does, um,,, is your dad,,,
was he, like, into The Flintstones?
- Hey, how are you feeling? - Ugh,
I'm okay, thank you,
- Wait, why? - We heard about
your father's passing, of course,
Oh, yes, no, of course,
I,,, I thought maybe you had heard
I had a breakdown, which I assure you,
- I have not had, - Okay,
I kind of disassociated very briefly
after my father's passing, full disclosure,
but I am fine now, 100 percent, ready to go,
Okay, thanks for that,
Sorry to dive right in, but I have Clara, Nishant,
Neil, Blaire, and Thomas on the line also,
Okay, yes, thank you, go ahead,
So, these will be a little different
than the previous batch, I'll let Thomas discuss it
a little more,
We're gonna have a project that is almost exactly the same
- in scope as the previous batch, - Max, yo!
- What? - I saw one of those things,
one of those,,, those sloth things,
- What? - One of the,,, the sloths
the lawyer was talking about, the Sloth Fund,
- Really? - Huh, what?
Are you sure it wasn't like a cat?
Absolutely could've been a cat, it was very dark,
there were a lot of shadows, but I think it might've been
- one of those sloths, - Okay, I'm on a work call,
- Can I talk to you later? - Huh?
I'm on a work call, can I talk to you later?
Okay, I'm gonna be,,, just meet me
- in five at the thing, - Maxwell, did we lose you?
- Wait, we lost you, - Hey, I'm sorry,
Sorry, you cut out for one second,
- can you say that again? - Their CMO said they loved
the first round, but it was too artsy,
- I see, - And Ben said he's had
- this chat with you before, - Yeah, no, no, I understand,
- loud and clear, - Okay, thanks,
- Let's really make it pop, - Yep, it'll be perfect,
I'll start a pitch deck tonight, I should have something
- for you tomorrow, - You sure we shouldn't give this
- to someone else right now? - No, no, no, really, I am fine,
I do appreciate that, but I'm fine,
- Thank you, - Great, thanks,
All right, thank you for the call, bye for now,
Bye,
This is about where I saw 'em,
I'd be crazy for there to be a mall here,
You should really pay that Sloth Fund thing,
You have a corporate job,
Might as well put that blood money to some good use,
Blood money?
I help make industrial videos for pharmaceutical companies,
Exactly,
It'd be pretty awesome to have a Billy's Burritos
100 feet from your bedroom, though,
- What are you looking at? - Whoa!
Oh, man,
What's up?
Hey, you wanna hear an idea for a short story?
I've been working on this, it's called Galaxy Sloth,
Imagine this: There's a sloth so big,
he's the size of a galaxy,
One day he saw a tree
that he wanted to live in, right?
So, he starts moving towards it,
but because he was so big,
the laws of relativity applied,
For Galaxy Sloth, a moment passed,
but for the tree,
it was ages,
So, when he got there, he found it had turned rotten
and disintegrated,
That's a great story, are you gonna,,,
Time passes differently
for all of us,
Okay,
That was my point,
- Okay, cool, - If you don't act fast,
my home will be taken,
and then I'll die,
You need to pay that $10,000,
- I mean,,, - Your dad would want you to,
Oh, God, please don't say that,
I mean, I'm gonna do something,
I don't,,, I don't have that kind of money laying around,
Oh, gosh,
- What? - I don't wanna hear that,
"I don't have the money,"
I will die without a home,
I am not gonna let you die,
How can I help? Tell me, please,
You already know,
I do?
Yes,
Play your part,
Maxwell, what are you doing,
a little pre-dawn nature walk?
Uh, yeah, yeah, exactly,
What about you, what are you doing up?
Ah, yeah, I'm used to getting up at 5:00 a,m,
for this side gig I do,
What side gig?
Uh, I'm a professional snuggler,
- Get out of here, - Yeah,
I, uh,,, I freelance, and then also
I work for this site called CuddleFish,
- and they book me out, so, - No kidding,
Actually, um, why don't,,, you wanna,,,?
- No, please, - I could,,,
I'm fine,
- Thanks, - Sure,
Hey, look,
I know you didn't really get the chance
to make up with Dad,
You didn't,,,
you didn't kill Dad,
I know, I know that,
You didn't,,, you didn't kill him,
I know that,
You didn't kill your dad, our dad,
- I know, - You didn't kill your dad,
Barney, I feel like you're doing that scene
- from Good Will Hunting, - Yeah, no, I was,
Okay, thank you, I get it,
You did everything Dad ever wanted you to do,
and Dad didn't do anything
that he didn't wanna do, including die,
So, just,,,
Man, just give that
big brain of yours a rest,
- All right, - Okay,
I'm gonna go work on some poses,
All right,
It sounds good,
- What? - I'm just saying it sounds good,
Hey, thanks,
Was that Tom Petty?
- Um, no, - Oh, that sounded like
Tom Petty, which is good,
except you ever notice how in "Free Fallin',"
he says the good girl's into her mother, horses, and Elvis,
I mean, that sounds like a boring conformist to me,
- I don't even know why he's,,, - Hey, Barney,
- He's so like up in arms about,,, - Barney, sorry,
- Yeah? - So, I do wanna raise the money
for that sloth fund, you know?
But, I'm gonna need some help,
Will you help me?
Uh, yeah,
I've already got the solution,
Forgot this was here,
I made this to show Dad
that I could actually build something
- that would really sell, - Barney, what is it?
Oh, okay, oh, man, I'm a lazy millennial,
I don't wanna eat food
and dirty dishes, and then have to
put 'em in the dishwasher and do 'em,
Not so fast,
lazy millennial person,
What if you have
a cabinet and a dishwasher
in one?
Take out your dishes, you eat your yum-yums,
put them back in the dishwasher,
and you hit "Wash,"
This is now clean on that side,,,
- Yeah, - ,,,and then there's another one
over here on this side, so now the dirty dishes
go in here, and then once these are clean,
- and this is clean, dirty,,, - I get it,
And then, you can,,, you can sell these,
and you know, use some of the dough that you make
- for the Sloth Fund, - Uh-huh,
See, the thing is I don't think this is gonna work
to make the money we need by next week,
Like, we would have to raise money just to make these
in the first place, you know, there's like a supply chain,
Have to market them, test them,
- All that, - Yeah, it's just you,,,
No, Barney, I get it, it's a great idea,
- Put it back in, and then,,, - This is what I was thinking:
Why don't we make a fundraising page,
and then just add some content?
You know, I thought I could even write, like,
a "Save the Sloth" song, or whatever,
You know?
But, my point is, I need help,
Will you help me?
I'm gonna order Chinese food,
That,,,
Is that a yes?
Adult Caucasian male heroically waves away
fork for chopsticks,
It's Werner,,, Werner Herzog,
- You mean "Verner"? - Is it Verner?
- Yes, - So, I think I'm actually gonna
need to stay here for a while,
My, um,
living situation is a bit in flux, so,
- Jenna? - Hi!
Hey,
- Hi, guys, - Hey,
- Hi, hi, hi, - Hi, how are you doing?
Oh, good,
- It's so good to see you, - Good to see you, too,
- Hi, - Ugh,
- you smell like air travel, - Oh, really?
It was such a long flight,
How are you, how are you?
- Ugh, okay, - Good, we're good,
- Yeah? - Yeah,
- You got Chinese food? - Yeah,
- Yes, - Oh, my God, can I have?
- Get in here, - Yeah, it's been so long,
So, you slept in a hammock, huh?
- Yeah, it's pretty cool, right? - It looks more like
a glammock,
It was so nice, you guys,
No phone, no email, no internet,
I already feel too plugged back in,
Now, how does a social media influencer
survive without being plugged in?
- I'm a photographer, - Mm,
- and I am a sculptor, - Ooh, don't start,
- Don't start, - Ohh,
You know actually, this is a convenient segue,
how's work at the gallery, how's it going there?
- Are you mad at me? - Kind of,
- What happened? - I am no longer employed
- by the gallery, - How come?
- Yeah, how come? - Because I quit,
Ugh, why?
Because they fired me,
And why did they fire you
from a job I got you?
My curator friend Claude works there,
- It was this jerk Lamarck, - I heard you punched him,
- What is wrong with you? - What, I didn't punch him,
Yeah, my friend Allison DMed me,
Oh, this is supposed to be like the auto-correct of the century,
I did not punch him, I punned him,
What is that, what does that mean?
So, like, there's this artiste Lamarck,
he's like this pseudo-intellectual socialite,
and he got a $100,000 grant,
and all he did was pin
$100,000 bills all over the walls of the gallery,
So, like, one day, it was just him and me there,
because no one was coming to see his show,
and I walked up to him, and I was like,
"It doesn't look like your money is generating
a lot of interest,"
- Ha! - Don't laugh at that,
- It's great, - You're an ingrate,
and you deserve to be fired for that,
- It's not funny, - I thought you were gonna say
that you, um, stole picture frames,
and then they accused you of it, and you were like, "No, no, no,
I was framed,"
Oh, yeah, uh,
- That is pretty funny, - Mm-hm,
Guys,
Moment of silence,
What is it for?
- It's for Dad, - I know,
I know that,
- Sorry, - Really?
- It's work, gotta take it, - Like, right now though?
Yep,
Okay, silence over, purpose served,
No, no, it's not too late,
I know, no, I actually finished it overnight,
but I looked at it this morning
and it just wasn't going in the right direction,
and I didn't wanna send you something
going in the wrong direction,,, yeah,
Felt so guilty as soon as I found out,
You know, if anyone
would have forgiven you for missing his funeral
because of work, it would be Dad,
No, I know, I just,,,
I feel bad,
Well,
Maxwell's gonna be
raising money for this
sloth foundation,
Would you wanna help?
- A,,, a sloth foundation thing? - Yes,
No, I,,,
I think I'm good,
Yeah, I,,,
if you give me like another day or two,
uh, that'd be fine,
Thank you,
Okay, great, yeah, yeah,
Take care, bye,
♪ I'm just a little baby sloth ♪
♪ Please, please ♪
♪ Don't let me die ♪
♪ Please, please ♪
♪ Don't let me die-ie-ie-ie-ie-ie ♪
♪ Let me live ♪
♪ I wanna give ♪
You gonna get in here or what?
No, I have way too much work to do,
- What work? - I'm editing photos,
You're pretending to be a photographer?
Um, I am a photographer,
Oh, you are not a photographer,
You're like a social media personality
with famous friends,
You're like a DJ claiming to be a concert pianist,
Yeah, well, at least I have a real job,
I'm working on stuff,
You're working on stuff?
Well, what kind of stuff you working on?
Would you guys give me a hand?
Please,
What are you,,, what are you doing?
Oh, you know, you really shouldn't shoot from that angle,
- Very unflattering, - Which is
the most important thing in art is to flatter yourself, right?
- Ugh, Barney, - Guys, I wrote a song
for the fundraiser, from the perspective
of the sloth,,, a sloth,
Okay,
- So, will you guys help me? - I have like a thousand emails
- to respond to, it's a lot, - I have, like, a lot of stuff
- I have to think about today, - Come on!
I challenge you to help me,
- Why are you laughing? - "Challenge"?
That's,,, that's, like, such a Dad tactic,
- It is, - So, am I wrong?
I mean, this is Dad's legacy,
- Legacy? - Yes,
All right, there,,, there is, like, this video sketch idea
I've wanted to shoot for a while, but it's like,
it's too hard to shoot in the city,
Okay, if I help you with this, will you help me with that?
Yeah, absolutely, yeah,
- You promise? - Yes, I promise,
Okay, 'cause you can't back out on a promise,
I'm not gonna back out on a promise,
- Okay, - Have fun, you two,
She's got, like, a lot of important work to do,
- Mm-hm, - I do, do you wanna respond
to all of these, can you, could you even?
I don't know, you're so tired all the time,
So, does this look okay?
Uh, it looks flattering to me,
Okay, should I hit "Record," or,,,?
Um, give me one second,
Uh,
Okay, well what's this new tomfoolery?
Sometimes when my heart rate gets going,
uh, I pass out, it used to happen during sports,
and when I would play with my band,
I'd get nervous, but if I stood on my head,
I would redirect the blood,
Okay, that's super normal,
I mean, listen, man, I really thought
you sounded good,
Yeah, I generally like things
to be perfect, you know?
Yeah, well,
Yeah, that,,, that doesn't really exist,
Besides, I mean, a disaster
would get you more attention on the internet
than something good,
Thanks,
Okay,
Uh, 'kay,
Should I just,,, are you gonna tell,,,?
One sec,
Okay, I got an idea, why don't I just
hit "Record" now, and you just start now?
Go,
♪ Every story comes to an end ♪
♪ But if you have a helping hand to lend ♪
♪ Don't let me die ♪
♪ I need a home and to find a mate ♪
♪ So if you give big I can procreate ♪
♪ Don't let me die ♪
♪ I live my life in a single tree ♪
♪ It's no conspiracy ♪
♪ I do it to save energy ♪
♪ Don't let me die ♪
♪ Please, please, please, don't let me die ♪
♪ You can't put a price on a life ♪
♪ But $10,000 would sure be nice ♪
♪ Fragile like a little feather ♪
♪ Always subject to the weather ♪
♪ Won't you try to remember ♪
♪ Not to let me die ♪
♪ This is a story about birds and bees ♪
♪ And a single sloth on bended knee ♪
♪ Don't let me die ♪
♪ Please, please, please, don't let me die ♪
♪ Please, please, donate ♪
♪ All your money ♪
What, what, no good?
No, Max, that was, like, incredible,
Seriously, that,,, that,,,
I'm like,,, you kinda blew me away there,
Okay, now it's my turn,
Cool,
What are we doing?
I know I promised, but couldn't you just
add in the shots afterwards digitally?
No, what I'm trying to do here
is a live, first-person zombie shooter game,
Okay, if I did it digitally, then it's just a video game,
Why do I have to do the painful part?
- This is your idea, - Uh, precisely,
because it's my idea,
- and you promised, - Oh, come on,
Yeah, that's the spirit,
Oh, this looks so good,
Get into it, come at me, bro!
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, ahh!
Stop, ow, ow, stop, stop!
Stop, stop!
God, oh, God!
That really hurt!
- Ugh! - You all right?
I think it's worth it, I think it is
definitely worth it,
Wait a second, what does this have to do
with the Sloth Fund?
Right, uh, oop, hold on,
Kill zombies, not sloths,
I need ice,
Ice, ice, baby,
- God, - Oh, I got it, thank you,
- Mm-hm, - You okay?
Yeah, just bruising,
Sad Max: Boring Road, do you have more ideas?
More content, more money,
Let's just come up with more stuff for tomorrow,
- I gotta get some work done, - Boring,
- My job's gonna kill me, - Boring, boring, boring,
Sorry, sorry, sorry,
Can I ask you a question?
Yes,
So, you are obviously under zero obligation
to help with the Sloth Fund, or, you know, anything,
Yeah, I'm a free agent,
Exactly, having said that,
it would be super helpful if you could post something,
or even just, like, hashtag something,
'cause you have such a big online following,
Listen, I know Barney has some issues with what I do, but,,,
- I do, - That's 'cause you're jealous,
- Obviously, - Do I look like I'm jealous?
- Yeah, - Yeah,
Look, I worked really hard to create my brand
and build my following,
I'm not just giving it away,
It's like if you went to a party
and you met a dermatologist,,,
I did meet a dermatologist at a party once,
- Cool, - What did she say?
She said that I have dermatitis,
- Well, you do, - I know,
But, like, you wouldn't just casually ask her
to remove something from your face, right?
I mean, that's that person's job,
- You get what I'm saying, - I do,
- Yeah, okay, cool, - I get that,
- Sorry, yeah, - Yeah,
- I respect that completely, - Cool, Thank you,
- Sure, - Yeah,
That song you were playing, though, that was good,
- Thank you, - It was,
- Thanks, guys, - Really good,
You said there were more instruments
- in the basement, right? - You said you had to work,
I do, I'm going to,
You guys, you gotta come check this out!
- What? - Downstairs, come here!
We've been summoned,
- Max? - Over here!
Max?
What is this?
Whoa, Dad was collecting paintings?
He wasn't collecting paintings,
These are his paintings, he made these paintings,
- Really? - Yes,
- How do you know? - They're all signed by him,
- This is crazy, - There are dozens in here,
and there are stacks more in the boiler room,
No way,
This is actually pretty good,
- Did you know? - No, no,
- Barney, did you know? - No, of course I didn't know,
I didn't know he was capable of anything like this,
You guys, let's get these out of here,
See 'em in the light,
God, it's so crazy how there's, like,
oils, acrylic, abstract, realism,
It's like he was
exploring every medium,
Yeah, but he hid this whole part of his life from us,
I know,
I'm gonna go explore some more of that life downstairs,
You think things would've been different if we knew
Dad was a painter?
Would you have stopped playing music?
I actually don't even really remember
why you stopped,
It kinda had to do with Dad actually,
Really?
Everything with him was a negotiation, you know?
It's not like he minded me being into music at school,
like playing trumpet and piano,
but when I started my own band,
he said it was a waste of time,
This one summer,
he set me up with this internship at a law office
that a colleague of his worked at,
and at the same time, I had applied
to this songwriting workshop
in Nashville,
I was pretty good, I mean, I thought I was, like, becoming
a really good songwriter, and I loved it,
And so, I applied and I got in,
but it conflicted with the internship,
and I couldn't negotiate through that,
so I just,,, I didn't go,
Yeah, but Dad used to say that stuff to me
about negotiating one for one,
but I would just push back,
and we always worked it out,
This was around the same time
that Mom died,
and I just
didn't feel like I could negotiate with Dad anymore,
I couldn't challenge him,
He was so,,, he was so unhappy,
and so I just felt like I had to be responsible to him,
and that was that,
Hey, are you up?
Can I ask you a question?
Shoot,
Did you know my dad made all those paintings?
Why didn't he show them to anybody?
Uh, probably because
he was afraid he sucked,
Or do you think it was because he thought
it wasn't what he was supposed to be doing with his time?
I mean, that's kinda the same thing, you know?
- Did you know him well? - Yeah, I mean,
he came into the, uh, habitat every now and then,
He painted a nude of me once,
- A nude? - Yep,
I guess I always thought he did things for a reason,
like, he was hard on me 'cause he was trying
to teach me something,
He thought money solved most problems,
You're trying to save me with money, aren't you?
Yeah, but, I mean, how else?
Did you ever hear the story of the umbrella
born on a planet without rain?
No,
I'm sorry, am I supposed to guess what that's about,
or are you gonna tell me? I can never tell,
It's like, you think you're not meant for this world,
Like, if you take up too much space,
you'll hurt people,
I got two words for ya, you ready?
Go big,
but for now, just focus on the first part,
- The first part? - Go!
Why do you keep on waking me up in the middle of the night?
- What's that all about? - Oh, right, sorry, sorry,
Good talk,
Yes, I know, I thought
I'd have something for you,
No, well, what happened was I got hit by a bug,
I mean, just totally knocked me out,
Um, but here's the thing,
tell Thomas,,, tell Thomas that I will have
something for him
by, uh,,, by tomorrow morning
the absolute latest, okay?
Yes, thank you, it's all on me,
Okay, I really appreciate that,
Take care,
- Hey, sorry, - All right, Mr, One Man Band,
Do you wanna do, like, a headstand or anything, or,,,?
Um, no,
Okay,
All right, I'm hitting "Record,"
Okay,
♪ Gotta keep 'em home in their habitat now ♪
♪ Developers developin' plans, no doubt ♪
♪ Gotta wave a banner, gotta have a protest ♪
♪ No self respecting sloth would expect less ♪
♪ Talkin' with a sloth all night ♪
♪ Talkin' 'till the morning light ♪
♪ Telling truths and telling lies ♪
♪ Keeping that sloth alive ♪
♪ They don't own the sky and trees ♪
♪ They're just in the space between ♪
♪ No one can claim everything ♪
♪ And your burrito place is lame ♪
♪ You think it's right because they're named after
the seven deadly sins ♪
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
- That was awesome! - Yeah,
Can we do another one of my ideas now?
- Yeah, - Yes! All right!
Give me a big smile,
Perfect!
Okay,
Dreadfully nice weather we're having, my dear,
My dear?
Are you hard of hearing?
Apologies, good sir,
Why, you were speaking to my texting hat,
Your texting hat?
I can text,
but it looks like I'm attending to you!
- But it is an artifice! - Indeedily-doo!
I proclaim it is the very epitome
of scandalous behavior,
Nonsense,
The only real scandal is letting a species die!
Of what species do you speak?
Why, the North American sloth, of course,
Donate to the fund, and donate big!
Hit it!
Cut!
Awesome,
You really think so?
Yeah, that was great,
Was it, 'cause it's like when you, you know,,,
- looks like the face, - You're overthinking it,
- Yeah? All right, - It was great,
How do you think the fundraiser's doin'?
I think it's got some traction, I don't know,
I don't really know what to expect, you know,
- Hey, idiots! - Hey!
- Uh, only he responded to that, - You guys look good,
So, listen, I reached out to some of my people,
and I think I got us a sponsor,
- a bar opening, - Mm!
- That's amazing! - Yeah,
but we have to get it all together pretty fast,
They said they'd give us $2,500
if I post a video with our exact specifications
and it gets 10,000 views before tomorrow,
which it totally will,
That's great, that is not an
- insignificant amount of money, - That's huge!
I could tell this is important to you,
- It is, thank you, - Yeah,
So, should we do this?
- Let's do it! - Yeah, let's do it!
- Still don't quite get it, - Get what?
So this is an ad for this new club,
- and also juice? - I believe it's called
- cross-promotion, - Yes, I understand,
but let me be more specific,
Why are we promoting these two products
at the same time, like,
what are they trying to get kids to go clubbing in New York?
I would drink juice at a club,
Yeah, of course you would,
What does that mean?
- Well, it's ju,,, I mean,,, - Guys, guys,
the point is that both of these products
activate the pleasure center of the brain,
You want the both more by virtue of them being coupled together,
There's been a ton of studies on this,
Okay, let's get ready to go for tonight,
I don't know how to influence,
- Don't sell yourself short, - It's right here,
Okay, will you put the light back there,
and then we're gonna put one over here,
Put what where, and then who?
- Seriously? - Okay,
But don't put that in a wet spot!
- I don't know what,,, - I don't want it to get wet,
- so just,,, - How do I know what's wet
- and what's dry? - Just look down!
- Is there water there? - It's all green!
Yeah, but you can tell if there's wet grass,
Donate to the Sloth Fund,
Donate to the Sloth Fund to save an animal,
And come to animal bar on the West Side
to save yourself,
Also, do you like juice?
Juice, oh, yeah!
Come get your juice on with Jimmy's Juice!
- Jimmy's Juice, - Sloth Fund,
Rabbit noise, rabbit noise, rabbit noise!
Hi, Vanessa,
Yes,,, No, no, no, it's fine,
I know, I know,
I apologize, I honestly,
I thought I would have something for you by now as well,
Um,,,
No, no, no, no, no, that's, I don't think that's necessary,
Hey, I gotta say, you know, with all my bellyaching,
this juice is actually pretty good!
Oh, my God, I told you that like a million times,
Why do you never listen to me?
Because you have a lot of bad things to say,
- That is so rude, I do not, - Well,
hold on, pump the brakes here,
I do have to say
I'm very impressed with that camera work,
Thank you!
- I'm sorry,,, - That was so nice of you,
,,,that I dump on your stuff all the time,
- I'm sorry too, - For what?
That you dump on my stuff all the time,
Boom, got you!
- I'm not sorry for nothin'! - You're a sassy unicorn!
- Yes you are! - That's right, do you see that?
I've, honestly, I've just been
a little wrapped up in a, like, a family obligation
to be honest, and,,,
No, no, no, no, no, no, that's,,,
Mm-hmm,
Uh-huh,
Okay,
I understand,
Okay,
Sure, so,,, Mm-hmm,
Okay,
Good night,
What do you think is actually in this juice?
Probably a healthy combination
of what's ever inside of those fluorescent sticks there,
Fluorescent sticks? These are called glow sticks,
- They,,, I didn't,,, - How do you not know that?
- Oh, my God, - I really love these,
Like, I wanna kind of wear them,,,
- Of course you do, - Hi!
What's goin' on?
Uh, work just took me off my main client,
told me I shouldn't come in for a little bit,
- Whoa! - What does that even mean?
Um, it means I get a mini forced vacation,
- which is fine, - All right,
I hate that job, also,
So, that's all the stuff,
Um, also, the videos are getting more hits,
- and we got some more donations, - Really?
- Yes, - No way!
- That's great, - Whoa, I mean, these are all
reasons to celebrate,,,
- Yes, absolutely, - ,,,I would say, right?
- Okay, - Are we gonna celebrate?
- Yeah! - Okay!
- Cheers, brothers, - Cheers,
The North American sloth is a sub-species of sloth
that lives in North America
whose ranks have been decimated by modernity,
If this fund closes, I mean, if the fund closes,
uh, I mean, you know,
it goes back into public land,,,
- Didn't we already do this? - ,,,all the sloths are gone,
- Sloth Fund, Sloth Fund, - Barney,
It's hard to say,
- Didn't we already do this? - Hey, hi, hello!
Didn't you hear?
Your dad wrote you letters
to show you how much he cared,
Oh, cool,
"My son,
if I failed you at all,
it's in not having let you know specifically
how I feel about you,
There was no room you entered that didn't get brighter
for your presence,
Your sense of elan,,,"
I love, I love that,,, "your sense of elan,
the creative impulses you channeled,
your whimsical spirit,
all of these were the truest sources of joy for me,
Put quite simply,
you know how to live,
and that, to the degree that I molded you,
is my greatest success as a man,
Follow your dreams, my son,
dreams ensconced in my love,
Yours truly, your father,"
- Wow! - Isn't that amazing?
- That's amazing, - Yeah, anyway, uh,
let me get to yours, Maxwell, here we go,
- Okay, - Oh,
- So, Maxwell,,, - I'm Barney,
- No, I'm Maxwell, - You're,,,
Oh, my God, is that true?
That one was for you,
- This one's actually for you, - Oh, that's,,,
- You're Maxwell? - No, I'm Barney,
Barney, that's yours,
This is yours, I really am
- sorry about that, - That was amazing!
- Is that cool? We good? - Oh, no, that's great!
- I love that, okay, - Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Oh, this is,,, Ready?
"Max, see to my estate,
Your brother cannot be depended on
in that regard,"
I actually think I was supposed to read these privately,
- Is there,,, - Is all that had on it?
There,,, That's it, I mean, there's not even
- a sticky, or anything, - Oh, no!
You listen to me,
You want to fail me and fail your father
and destroy his legacy?
- Is that what you want? - No, no, no, of course not!
Then I challenge you,
- You should go big! - Yes!
Yes, I'm gonna go big,
You aren't trying hard enough, Maxwell,
Sloth Fund, Sloth Fund, Sloth Fund, Sloth Fund,
♪ Don't let me down ♪
Sloth Fund, Sloth Fund, Sloth Fund!
I never really remember
the words after that, what is it?
Get off your butt and get something done today!
- Ugh, so close! - Ugh!
- Ugh! Ewie, ewie, gooey!
Hey, hey, hey, hey, family meeting real quick,
It's family game time,
- Yeah, - This is important,
Really quick, really quick,
Max, will you just come relax with us?
I'm leaving in a couple days, please?
Hear me out, okay, if we hit this mark, right,
if we raise this money,
we're just gonna have to raise the same amount next month,
This is taking way too much time,
We can't keep doing it in this piecemeal fashion,
That's why I think we should make one big splash
and make a huge sum of money,
We should have a party,
- I like a party, - And that party
will be a fundraising banquet,
- Oh! - Whoa,
Wait, dude, that is not, that's not a party,
- No, listen,,, - It's a total,,,
,,,we don't have the house for that much longer,
Let's just spend some quality time together,
I think it would be really good for you,
No, but that's my point!
What better way to leave this house and honor it
than by saving this fund for Dad,
I feel like you're losing your mind,
I'm not losing my mind,
I feel totally fine,
I've done a lot of stuff for this family in my life,
and that's on me, that was my choice,
That's fine, but I am asking you two
to do this one thing for me this one time,
It'll be less than 24 hours of our lives,
Succeed or fail,
I'll never ask anything of you again,
Max,
I will do all the heavy lifting,
Please, please, please, just say yes?
Okay!
- Fine, yeah, fine, - Fine!
- Fine, we'll do it, - Thank you, thank you,
I really appreciate it,
This is great,
I'm gonna email you a spreadsheet detailing
everybody's responsibilities,
Awesome!
Spreadsheet?
Oh, no!
So in the morning, you can help me
attach the drone to the livestream, yeah?
That is fantastic, thank you so much,
All right, great!
We'll touch base then,
Good night,
- Hi! - Hey,
- Can I ask you a question? - Yeah,
Do you feel like there's anything I can do to
talk you out of having this event?
- No, - No,
I could definitely still use your help, though,
Uh, trying to help you is all Barney and I have been doing!
Great,
Get some sleep,
You too,
Night,
Good night,
Okay, I know today's gonna be crazy,
but before we get started, I just wanna say thank you
for your time and your attention,
Is this a TED Talk?
If there's anything I've learned
from working on teams in crunch time,
it's that we really say yes to each other,
Say someone has an idea, we wanna see how far it can go,
just say yes,
Say, for example,,,
Someone needs to take a bathroom break,
Are you asking?
Yes,
How 'bout in just a bit?
Okay, 'cause that sounds like a no, I think,
It's a yes to going later,
Oh, okay, so it's a yes to no bathroom break?
It's a yes to respecting everyone's time,,,
Eh, I'm pretty sure that was a no,
- Don't you think so? - Yeah,
I think, uh, we've decided that is a no,
It's a yes to being a team player,
- How 'bout that? - Okay, well, how about
you say yes to my butt?
Okay, I'm gonna say yes to leaving,
- Hey, and I'll say yes to that! - This is crazy,
Please, please!
Please, please, stay,
Sorry,
I'm just feeling a little stressed out,
Can we please just go get the tables,
bring them back here and start setting up
for everything?
Please?
Fine, fine, let's just,,, Come on,
- I'll give you a maybe, - All right,
Oh, my God, there's so many, okay,
I guess just,,,
Ugh,
It's hot,
Wait, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, don't set it up here,
Let's bring it to where it's gonna be,
and then set it up there, okay?
There's no point in setting it up here,
Are you gonna be like this all day?
Yes,
Ha!
Get it? Instead of saying no?
All right, can we just move the table, please?
Thank you,
Sorry, can you guys move a little faster?
We're mov,,, You want us to run with a table?
- Okay, fine, fine, sorry, - Jeez!
Swing around so it's set up this way,
Oh, he's setting them all in a line,
Can you move fast,,, Can you do it a little faster, though,
'cause I feel like you're,,,
I'm not trying to be a jerk,
I just think if people show up,
and we're not ready, it's catastrophic,
Then we get zero money, I mean, who would show up
- to a fundraiser,,, - We're gonna be ready,
We have the whole day!
I think these are a little close together,
like, you know, I don't think that, um,,,
Maybe we could put swivel chairs,
and they could sort of go in-between,
That's fine, guys, I got this one,
I don't need help,
I'll just open it up right here,
I'll get one faster than you,
look at that, look at my hustle,
- Look how fast I'm going, - Look at me not wasting time
- by not arguing! - I'm not wasting time!
You just said I was wasting time by arguing,
- and now I,,, - Oh, my God, okay,
Let's just take a breath,
And we'll,,,
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
It's so hot!
Do you think people are gonna wanna
sit in the sun like this, though,
'cause it's really hot over here,
But by the time they get here,
the sun'll be further down,
Is that how it works?
I'm sorry I get angry, I am, I really am,,,
- Oh? - ,,,but also you're prov,,,
you're intentionally provoking me,
you're trying to get me angry,
and then when I do, you say it's a problem,
What is he doing?
- He's like a drill sergeant, - Ugh,
Maybe he should have gone into the military,
- Look at that, oh, man,,, - Dude!
- ,,,I wish I had my camera, - Are you serious?
It's weight bearing!
- Look at that! - I know you wanna have fun,
- I do, I get that, I get that! - Just admit that I'm sexy!
Stop it, just stop!
Like, it's like you're tryin' to drive me crazy,
I get that you wanna have fun, but it is not fun for me
to worry if we're not gonna be ready!
Will you just say that I'm sexy?
Just say it,
Maxwell!
Seriously, man, take a breath,
The veins in your forehead are, like, popping out,
You know how many events like this I've done?
It's gonna be totally fine,
I got this, we got this,
I just,,,
I know, I hear my own voice, and I don't like it,
and I'm sorry, but I just like,,,
- It's okay! - I don't know what to do,
I just need to, like, try to get this done,
- No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, - It's okay,
- We're gonna get it done, - I know you're just
trying to have fun, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
- I wanna have fun, I do, I,,, - It's gonna be a long day,
We just wanted it to be easy and breezy,
Why don't you get some water,
We're gonna set up the rest of the tables,
When you come out, it's gonna be done,
It's gonna feel really good and refreshing,
- You sure? - Yeah, totally,
Go, seriously,
- Thank you, - Barney,
- You are sexy, - You are!
You are, we saw your muscles
when you were carrying those tables,
- It's exciting,,, - Thanks important to me,
- ,,,for you, - Thank you,
- I'll take this, - All right,
All right, we got it, we got it,
- Drink, like, a lot of water, - Thanks, guys,
Do you really think he's gonna make this happen tonight?
I don't know,
It's a lot of money to raise,
I know, he's, like, kinda cuckoo now,
I don't even know if it's worth it,
Well, it is for a sloth,
I'm sorry, but that's unacceptable,
I ordered a certain amount of centerpieces,
and that's how many I expect to get,
- Oh, like here, - No, no, no,
don't put me on hold,
just tell me I'm going to get what I ordered,
It's simple,
No, you can see my head,
- did you get some? - Hey, what is this?
They're bunnies,
Bunnies? We're doing a fundraiser for sloths,
How, how do you make a sloth?
You can just fold the napkins in half,
- To make a sloth? - That doesn't make sense,
- Good, wonderful, thank you, - I think these are adorable,
- These are amazing, - They're so great,
Wait, take a picture,
Yes,
Okay, I look forward to that,
Thank you very much, take care,
- They're really good, - Down here,
- Put 'em here? - Yeah,
Okay, take a picture like that,
- Okay, from the top, - No, no, no, we don't have time,
Can we just do that end part, please?
- Yes, sir! - All right,
And, action,
- Barney! - What?
- Gotta turn the camera on, - All right,
- I'm gonna say it, okay? - Please, just let her do this?
All right, proceed,
- We good? - Give me a second,
it's just warmin' up,
Are we good? I'm sorry,
Do you want it to look good, or no?
I want it to look good, but I want it to look good,,,
We have to post this in time,,,
It's gonna take three seconds,
All right, okay, sorry, go,
- You ready? - Yes,
Action!
As the chairman of the North American Slouth Foundat,,,
- Okay, we're still,,, - Slouth Found,,,
- I know I said slouth! - Still rolling,
Just take it again,
As the chairman of the North American Slouth Foundation,,,
It's not slouth!
- It is sloth! - All right,
don't beat yourself up!
- This is show biz, - Okay, guys,
we're still rolling,
- Take a breath, - Just take it again,
Okay,
As the chairman of the North American Sloth Foundation,
I urge you to tune into the livestream
at 8:00 Eastern and to give big,
an entire species is at stake,
Thank you,
Cut! Great, got it!
Okay, edit and post,
- Please? - Please,
Yes, thank you, all of that,
Um, now I think you guys should just change,
Just change, I'll go get the catering,
- Yah? Great, - Yeah,
♪ Furry animals are rad ♪
♪ If we save them, we'll be glad ♪
♪ If they die, we will be sad,,, ♪
Oh, wow!
Is that a rad, glad, sad rhyming there?
That's, that's gonna be great tonight,
Honestly, I just need a little bit of time to
work on this alone,
Okay, okay,
Well, let me know when the album comes out
because you are on your way, my friend,
Thank you!
♪ Furry animals are sad ♪
No,
- Hey, - Whoa!
- Has anybody showed up yet? - Huh?
- Is there anybody here? - Oh, I don't know,
Dude, what is all this stuff?
I have a multi-cam livestream set up,
This will catch the stage and the whole fundraiser here,
And then check this out,
this receiver is attached to that drone,
It will track this,
When I hit launch, that'll go up in the air
and track this, stay above it,
and it will broadcast the entire fundraiser
- from the sky, - No way!
- Whoa, - All right, let's go live,
Ugh,
All right, y'all ready?
- Yeah, - Ready as I'll ever be,
Here we go,
Hello, everyone, we are live
from the North American Sloth Foundation Fundraiser,
and we are about to launch
our North American Sloth Foundation drone,
Power up,
And three, two, one, launch,
Oh!
Okay!
I am gonna run to the driveway
and welcome our live attendees!
- Oh, my God, stop it! - How are you doing?
- Stop, Barney! - I'm a sloth!
- I'm a sloth, - You don't look anything,,,
- I'm a sloth! - That's not what a sloth,,,
It's way slower,
- Do your paw slower, - You guys,
should I be concerned?
There's no one here,
Like, not a single car,
- Really? - Yeah,
I mean,,,
It is a little weird,
- Ooh! Did we get one? - Oh, yeah, there's someone!
- Ooh, can I be the greeter? - Yeah, please, please,
- Thank you, - Yeah, but try to be like, uh,
normal,
- Hey, how ya doin'? - Hey!
Are you here for the fundraiser?
Yeah, this the, uh, Middletown Volleyball Awards?
Oh, no, that's not,,,
This is a fundraiser for the North American sloth,
- Okay, - Oh, can,,, No, wait!
- Like your job, job,,, - You wanna, you wanna,
- hang out and watch the live,,, - ,,,like, starting an
animal non-profit?
- No, uh, Sloth Fund, yeah, - Sloth funds,
- Yeah, - Yeah, come on in!
No, no, that's fine, thank you though,
- I'm sorry? - I appreciate it, thank you,
- That's a negative? - I mean,
- who else would it be for? - Well, that was just some
lost guy looking for the Middletown
- Volleyball Award Ceremony, - Are you serious?
I tried to get him to come here,
He declined,
I do not, I don't understand what's going on!
Where is every,,, You gave him your list, right?
- Yeah, of course! - Okay, I did!
What time'd you send out the invites?
- Um, - Barney,
Why do you look
- guilty of some crime? - That's just my look,
You know me, like whenever a cashier inspects my 20s,
I'm worried I've been, like, counterfeiting money recently,
Hold on, I'm sorry, but,
we gave you a single responsibility,
Please tell me,
did you send out the email invitations?
I, I thought I,,,
When you gave me the email, I was looking at it,
but then I was adding all the people I could thing of
to add to the invite list,
- We said send it! - I, I know!
- I just forgot to,,, I thought,,, - No! No, no!
- You cannot be serious, man! - I just walked away from
the computer for two seconds,
I'm so sorry, I am so sorry, Max,
It's okay,
I am so sorry,
Okay, okay, it's cool, whatever, does not matter,
We will just do it anyway,
The livestream is on,
We will act like we're talkin' to people instead of
empty freakin' chairs!
No, no, we're not gonna do that,
What do you mean no, what do you mean no we're not gonna do it?
No, you are,,, Look at yourself, you're losing your mind!
I mean, I think, like, you're kind of in a,,,
Do you seem like in a good state for a live stream?
- Yeah, it's, like, not,,, - Oh, my God,
- Why don't we just put it off? - No, no, listen!
This is so typical of both of you!
Since the beginning of time,
you go off and do whatever you want
whenever you want, and I have to
sit around and clean up after you,
and do everything myself,
This is ridiculous!
You missed Dad's funeral
'cause you were in the tropics taking photos,
- and I'm self-obsessive? - That's my job!
Oh, yeah, that's your job, to be self-obsessive,
I get it, I'm agreeing!
And you, and you,
how many times could I have used your help
when Dad got sick out here, huh?
You're my big brother, yet the only time I see you
happens to coincide when you need money!
- You know what? - What?
You love it,
I love it? I love what, exactly?
Yeah, what would you be without your crown of thorns,
letting everyone know how put upon you are,
"Oh, I could be, I could be so much further in life
- if it weren't for life itself!" - That's what you think?
- "I'm Maxwell, I'm just,,, - Sure, sure, sure, sure,
,,,bleeding out for everyone,"
I was so psyched to give up my social life,
I was psyched to give up my social life, move out here,
and live with Dad as his health declined,
while you gallivanted all over the world
wherever you wanted, and this man child here
- just skated from job to job, - Maxwell,
why don't you just stop talking and calm down
before you say something you're gonna regret,
No, I'm not regretting this,
I should have said this a long time ago,
Now, we are going to do this fundraiser,
and we are gonna raise that money!
No, we're not,
Right, right, I forgot,
nothing matters, like, why would it matter?
I mean, Dad's death doesn't even matter, right?
It's not even on your radar,
What did you just say?
Does Dad's death matter to you?
- Maxwell! - No, I'm seriously asking,
Doesn't seem like it,
It seems like, just like normal,
you're in your own little world
where all you care about is yourself,
Of course Dad's death matters to me,
I love Dad, I miss Dad!
And you know what?
Maybe he would still be here
if you took better care of him!
No, guys, guys!
Guys, stop, stop!
- Guys, stop, stop! - Come here!
Stop!
Max! Barney, go, take,,,
Stop, seriously?
Take a breath!
Walk it off! Walk it off!
Relax,
It's not worth it,
Yeah, right,
You're right, you're right,
I'm sorry,
None of this is worth it,
Doesn't matter,
Dad's death doesn't matter,
This banquet doesn't matter, you know?
Let's just, let's just
shut it down,
Right?
Max!
Let's just shut it down,
- Max! - Really?
- Just,,,
- Max! - ,,,shut it down!
- Let's just get rid of this all, - Okay, all right, okay,
Gonna flip that one too?
What's the difference, huh?
- Come on, come on! - Here we go!
- Are you serious? - Max!
What's the difference?
- Is he having a,,, - Oh, my God,
,,,breakdown? What?
It's been livestreaming this whole time,
I don't even know how to turn it off,
Here, hit that,
Hit that!
Max,
What are you doing?
I'm looking for my dead dog
- for my dead Dad, - What?
Because I failed him in every other way,
so at least I can do this,
Max, stop!
Stop!
Stop,
Did you see all those paintings he made of you?
- No, - We kept going through them,
and we found a bunch of you,
I laid 'em out so you can see them,
Max, he loved you,
I think that Dad thought he was
protecting himself by never showing anyone his paintings,
and I think he thought he was protecting you
by not letting you do music,
but he was wrong,
and that's his baggage, not yours,
but you're still negotiating with him,
The only reason you wrote those songs
was because it was for Dad's Sloth Fund,
So, what happens now?
You quit again?
No, no, raising that money
was important all on its own, okay, that was not nothing,
I know, I know, I'm, I'm not saying, I,,,
I'm just saying that
Dad was your excuse not to take the risk,
You have to stop looking to other people for permission,
- I love you, - I love you,
God,
I'm sorry,
- I miss him! - I know,
I know,
- You okay? - Yeah, yeah,
Sorry,
Thank you,
Will you please come inside?
Yeah, yeah, I will, in a bit, okay?
Yeah,
You need to get your dreams to stop being so smoky,
I'm sorry,
I'm so sorry,
Why?
- I failed you, - Wrong!
You started something, and I'm still here!
Nothing is over yet,
You made some really cool stuff
and put a ton of effort into this project,
That's all a sloth can ask for!
Really?
You mean that?
Yeah, the hardest part is starting,
and you did that,
It's not gonna be perfect immediately,
or ever, but, I mean, it's not supposed to,
Okay,
Thank you,
Thank you!
Thumbs up!
Ugh, did you just say "thumbs up?"
Well, yeah because I thought if I just gave you a thumbs up,
then maybe I'd make you feel bad because you don't have thumbs,
- and you can't do it, - I get it,
Okay,
Goodbye,
Hey!
Barney,
Barney, look, I'm sorry,
I didn't mean any of that stuff I said, seriously,
I'm so sorry,
Okay,
I'm just, I'm havin' a tough time,
It's so hard for me
to let go of that dynamic I had with Dad, you know,
even though he's gone,
Maybe especially because he's gone,
It's like the last remaining thing I have to
connect myself to him,
But that's not your fault,
It was totally unfair of me
to put that on you, okay, I was wrong,
Really, man,
Thanks,
And, I hear you,
I get it, you know,
He was my best audience,
Yeah, I hear you,
I feel so embarrassed,
I let the entire fund down,
Actually,
that's what I've been watching,
What do you mean?
Well, remember how I told you
that a disaster will get you more attention
than something good on the internet?
Yes,
Well, a disaster plus a fight
involving the chairman of a non-profit,
- internet gold, - No,
Yeah, the fight, you destroying the banquet,
It's been viewed over half a million times,
People think you're crazy, but I think it was worth it
because you're actually drawing a lot of attention
to the issue now,
And, people are calling in to ask the town
to step in and save the land,
- Really? - Yeah!
- Oh, my God, - Yeah, it's pretty sad,
and kinda bad, and rad, and also I'm kinda glad!
I mean, it's not exactly how you wanted it to go down,
but you got the job done!
- I mean, I guess that's true! - It's crazy!
Hey, what are you doin' later?
Um, I mean,
I have to check my calendar
to give you an official response,
Why, are you requesting my presence?
I am, I wrote another song,
and Jenna is gonna tape me playing it,
- What? - Oh, um,
I don't think the fund wants to be associated with you anymore,
Yeah, they don't want you to play songs for them,
No, no, no, no, I'm not talking about the fund,
There's this songwriting workshop in Nashville
that I wanted to go to
since forever,
and I need to apply with a song,
What? You're gonna apply for a,,,
It's like a musical
internship sort of thing?
Workshop,
Maxwell, that's amazing!
I mean, I just got goosebumps 'cause I'm so happy for you!
Thanks,
Yeah, of course, I mean, I would love to be there,
I could do whatever you need me to help,
like backup vocals, like whatever,
That sounds great,
Maybe, maybe make a beat?
Maybe just, like, sit silently and, like,
pretend like you're the audience,
Totally, 100 percent,
You know, if I get in,
I'm gonna be so much older than everybody else,
But that's okay, right, I mean,
I have to start somewhere,
Oh, dude, that's totally cool, I mean,
that's kinda like my crowd these days anyway,
and I think people think I'm pretty cool,
Well, uh,
thanks, man,
I appreciate it,
Thank you,
All right,
I'll see you later, okay?
I'm gonna go practice,
- I love you, - I love you,
- Oh, thanks, - Beverage,
- Thank you, - Of course,
Oh,
Oh, it looks really good,
- Do I need to, uh, shift? - Yeah, maybe, maybe just
- move in just a little bit, - In?
- Yeah, - Okay,
Oh, awesome,
- Okay, you ready? - Yes,
- All right, - I'm ready,
Good,
- Here we go, - All right,
Hi, my name is Maxwell Grant,
and this is a song I wrote
called "Things I'd Like to Know,"
♪ You were a deep dark forest I couldn't see through ♪
♪ Magical and proud, full of secrets too ♪
♪ You were a fancy banquet without any guests ♪
♪ All alone but for the chatter in your head ♪
♪ Here's the thing all about it though ♪
♪ Here's the thing that I'd like to know ♪
♪ I can't ask anybody else ♪
♪ Am I describing you
or myself? ♪
♪ You were a lion on fire in the family room ♪
♪ Scary and loud but pretty impressive too ♪
♪ You were a long-distance flight
that never came down ♪
♪ I'd see you above and be happy you were around ♪
♪ Here's the thing all about it though ♪
♪ Here's the thing that I'd like to know ♪
♪ If we'd fallen so outta touch,
why do I keep missing you so much? ♪
♪ And your bones were made from rubber bands ♪
♪ And you stretched them out 'bout as far as one can ♪
♪ And our love
is a mountain of pennies and dimes ♪
♪ You could lose ten thousand of them
and the mountain would be just fine ♪
♪ Well, I've been upside down since I came back home ♪
♪ Little bit of panic, but I'm finally all
on my own ♪
♪ Here's the thing all about it though ♪
♪ Here's the thing that I can't let go ♪
♪ If we'd fallen so outta touch,
why, then, do I miss you so much? ♪
♪ Yeah, why do I keep missing you so,,, ♪
♪ So much? ♪
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