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Reporting for duty, sir,
Hut, hut, hut, hut!
Well, she said she was fine earlier,
but now she's journaling
and she's probably not hearing anything I'm saying,
But I don't know if I buy it,
You know that,
Yeah, I've been pretty spacey today, haven't I?
A little bit,
You okay?
What's going on?
Probably being dramatic,
but I, I had this moment with dad this morning and just,,,
What do you mean, what happened?
I just,,, It was like, he wasn't really there,
He kept repeating information and--
- Oh, a little stammering and-- - Yeah,
- Telling the story again, - Over and over and I--
I know, I've noticed it,
I've noticed it, I know,
I just,,, And then I see how much Chaz looks up to him,
I know,
And, you know, I love that they're playing together,
And the army men thing is just--
And, and you, look, he's proud of what he did,
He served his country well, he won all those medals,
They're all on the wall and they're there for a reason,
because, you know, that was before people got medals
for just showing up,
It's important to him, so maybe that's good,
I, you know, I've also read that you're supposed
to just let him go,
Don't, you know, don't try to correct him or anything,
So we'll just see where it goes,
It all like filters back to, like, mom
and losing her all suddenly,
- Honey, I can't-- - I know, I know,
I know,
- It's okay, - I can't,
I can't go through that again,
- I know, - And I don't want,,,
I don't want Chaz having to go through that,
- I know, - And the grief
is something you carry for so long and he's so young,
And I,,,
Not having my mom here to help me through that,
raising our son,
I know, but we got through that, and how?
The same way this family gets through everything,
We give it to God, we pray, we trust,
He's doing good, we're doing good,
They're having fun,
And hey, look, work is finally slowing down
so I can be here,
I can be here this next week,
I'll take some of the burden off of you,
- Oh, don't make me feel guilty, - You are doing so much,
- No, I-- - No, you're doing so much,
You've got your,,, You've got a spa day,
- I don't know, - You gotta get your nails done,
- I should cancel it, - No,
Honey, look, don't do that, okay?
Take your day, okay?
Let me,,, Let me do this for you, please,
I will take care of the boys, you take care of your nails,
- In fact, let's start,,, - Oh, my goodness,
- This is just silly, - No, let's start
your spa day early,
I will prepare a little plate of chocolate
for my lady,,, and a spot of tea,
- Yes, oh! - You know how to win me off,
Yes, that's right, you know,
And you like the British accent as well, don't you?
- I do, - I'm going to talk like this
the rest of the night,
- Ooh! - But, for now,
I'm going to make you a spot of tea,
- All right, okay, stay there, - Please,
but make sure it's chamomile,
- Chamomile, - Yeah, no caffeine,
No, never,
Breakfast will be on the set, guys,
- Okay, thanks, hon, - Yep,
So, big man, what do you got planned today?
Well, I was thinking about going down
to The Roast today at noon to have one
of their classic hot dogs and root beer floats,
That's what I was gonna say,
Hey, great minds think alike, my man,
I love that you are talking about lunch
when we haven't even had breakfast yet,
Sweetheart, we're guys,
- That's what we do, - Oh, my God,
While you're busy getting your nails done,
we'll be being guys, having hot dogs
and root beer floats, huh?
Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo!
Now I feel like I'm gonna miss out,
You are,
Well, I'm sure you're going to enjoy
that beautiful manicure of yours,
You know me well, because I will thoroughly enjoy it,
Ah, All right,
- Hi, Lisa, - Hey, how are you doing?
Good, how are you?
Yeah, hanging in there, How are you doing?
- It's been too long, - I know,
- I'm good, busy, - My nails need some work,
as you can see,
Girl, I will take care of you, Right back this way,
Oh, thank you, girl,
So, Lisa, I know something's been bothering you,
Tell me, what's really going on with your family?
I think my dad's slipping a little,
I'm sorry to hear that, girl,
Slipping, is he okay though?
Not slipping like that,
I'm meaning forgetting stuff,
repeating stories, slowing down,
It's hard seeing him get older,
I feel that,
Girl, last year I went through the same thing
with my grandmother,
Oh, I'm sorry,
Yeah, and what's harder is,,,
Chaz is getting really attached to him,
- Oh, is he? - Yeah,
And you know, he loves the army stories,
which is really sweet, but,,,
And they're playing army men,
I just,,,
Army men? You know, I walk my dog over
to Boone Park every day,
- Really? - And there's this kid there,
He has tons of army men set up everywhere,
Oh, I wonder if Chaz knows him,
Maybe they're friends,
Maybe,
- Hey, you all right? - Thank you,
Sorry, boss, yeah,
Hey, I'm gonna grab the table over here,
Hey, man, how's it going?
So, can we get three hamburgers,
one hot dog and three root beer floats?
Hey, Dad, look at that,
Oh, yeah, "Guns of Navarone,"
I had one of those when I was a kid,
I used to play with it all the time,
- Do you still have it? - Uh, we had a yard sale,
It could be,,, Although it could be in the attic,
When we get home, can we search in the attic, please?
Oh, well, we'll,,, We'll see,
You know, go catch up with grandpa there,
I'm gonna catch up with Frank here, okay?
We'll also go in the attic today,
Frank, man, it's hot, huh?
Hey, champ, Well, I've been good,
- How about you? - How's it going?
Were you ever,,, bullied in school?
That's an interesting question,
I, uh,,, I was never bullied in school personally,
because I was bigger than the other kids,
But, you know, I joined World War II
because the Germans were bullying the world,
and we had to stand up for what was right,
Because if we didn't, nobody would,
Why do you ask?
Because I have this bully at school
who's messing with me,
Oh,,, All I can tell you is this, Chaz,
Sometimes you gotta stand up for what you believe in,
like we did in World War II,
because if you don't, nobody else will,
Yeah, kind of figured that out already,
I mean, he gives Danny wedgies every single day,
And he always says rude stuff,
and nobody ever does anything about it,
And it needs to be stopped,
Maybe this will help,
Did I,,,? I told you what I've done in World War II, yeah?
Well, I was in the ghost unit,
We were the unit that in World War II
helped make D-Day so successful,
We made phony tanks, phony troops,
and the Germans would fly over and take pictures thinking
that they were real, but they weren't,
We fooled them all the time,
That's it, that's it,
You're a genius, Grandpa,
All right, so what I miss?
Well, apparently I'm a genius,
Good to know,
Here are your floats,
- Mmm, - Very nice,
Thank you, Rosie,
All right, - Man,
Okay, so there you go, Pops,
All right, big guy,
This is amazing, Dad, And that's for you,
- Thank you, - And I get,,,
All right, - And I get the hamburger
and the hot dog, right?
Can we please say grace before?
Oh, no, no, no,
Yes, yes, Pops, Can we say grace
before we start? We say grace,
All right, all right, very good,
Dear Lord, thank you for this food today,
Thank you for our,,, My wonderful family,
God bless us everyone,
And just let's have a wonderful rest of our day,
- Amen, - Amen!
- There we go, yeah, - Oh, no, come on,
♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah
♪ I look around and all I see
Oh, yeah, this one,
This one rocks, uh-huh?
Oh,,, No,
I like this song, Dad,
Well, yeah, You guys,
there's no accounting for taste,
I'll tell ya, that's no Conway Twitty,
Now, Conway, now that was good music,
You know, Conway, he was a master,
Absolutely wonderful,
Okay, all right,
How about that, then?
Oh, hey, that is good music too,
- Yeah, - But yes, yes, yes,
Oh, man, that's wonderful,
Oh, Dave, that's great,
- Thank you, Oh, yeah, - Sure,
Well, hey, Dave, by the way,
on the way home, can we stop by HD Marigold?
I got something there I need to pick up,
Oh, sure thing, Pops,
- Wonderful, terrific, - Okay,
- Thank you so much, - All right,
Boom, boom, yeah,
We're jamming now, hey, Chaz?
Oh man, this is music,
- Great, - This is music,
It's,,, It's something, Pops,
Okay, Good?
Yeah,
Oh, you don't need us?
I don't need a babysitter, for goodness sake,
What do you think, I'm 90?
I'll be out in a couple of minutes,
- Okay, great, - Don't run away,
All right,
He's okay, And he's gone, he's gone,
Yeah, okay,
- Yeah! - Woo-hoo!
Okay,
All right, let's see what we got,
All right, that one,,, and this one,
All right, ma'am, I'll take these three, thank you,
All righty,
And if I can ask a big favor,
could you triple bag these?
Because my grandson's out in the car,
it's gonna be a big surprise for him,
- Sure, - I do not want him to see them,
- Sure, I'd be glad to, - Terrific,
All right, great,
- That'll be $6,75, - Okay, good,
- And here's $7, - Thank you,
- And there you go, - Thank you,
Thank you very, very much,
- Thank you, - Have a great night,
Have a good day,
- Bye-bye, - Bye-bye,
Uh-oh, here he comes,
Well, I wish you stayed and waited for me,
for goodness' sakes,
Did you get everything you need?
Yeah, I did, let's go,
- You good? - Come on, let the,,,
And hit the,,, hit the gas,
My favorite show's coming on TV,
Okay, all right, you good, Chaz?
- Yeah, - Okay, let's go,
Ah, these kids with their rock and roll,
Just like that, right?
That's good,
Hey, Dad, you wanna look for that "Guns of Navarone" stuff?
Ooh, you know what, bud? Maybe another time,
It's pretty hot up in that attic right now,
All right, well, tell me when you do go up,
I wanna go too,
Okay, well, I'm going up, but not in the attic,
No, too hot, too hot,
Ah, ah, no!
Dad, you're okay,
I think it was just a tank or something on TV,
Tanks? They might be talking about my unit,
I doubt it,
Did I ever tell you what I did in the war?
Yes, like 100 times,
Oh, my God,
'Cause you should have seen it, it was wonderful,
That Germans thought we were gonna hit them
in the Calais region,
but we came up with Operation Bodyguard,
We made tanks out of wood,
- Fooled them completely, - Wow,
They thought we had divisions of troops down there,
but it was just the few of us,
We were the unit that made ghost units,
It's why D-Day was so successful,
That's amazing, Dad,
Well, dinner's in the oven,
We'll be ready in a few minutes,
- Do you need to get ready? - Oh, nah, I've been sitting
in this chair all day, just relaxing,
And, you know, I hope you made enough for me,
Oh, I did, don't you worry, I always make enough,
Well, you're a wonderful cook, I,,, No offense,
Not as good as mom,
- I know, I know, I miss her, - I know, me too,
She--she was the love of my life,
She was my rock,
Yeah, did I ever tell you what I did in the war?
Yeah, I think maybe you should tell Chaz sometime,
- Oh, he's gonna love it, - I know,
He loves hearing all about it,
- He's a good kid, - He is,
He's a good kid,
He's a wonderful child,
Hey, go, go, go and make dinner,
I'm hungry, Don't burn it, please,
Hopefully I won't burn it this time,
- All right, thank you, - All right,
I'll see you in a few minutes, okay?
- All right, sweetheart, - All right,
Boom!
Click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click,
Ah,,,
Boom!
Come on, Chaz, it's time to come in,
Coming, Mom!
All right,
All right, pepper for Dave and salt for you,
Thank you, dear,
Do you mind blessing it?
- Oh, be my pleasure, - Okay,
Lord, bless this food we're about to receive,
May it nourish our bodies, our minds and our souls,
Amen,
- Amen, - Amen,
Amen,
I'm home, I'm home,
- Oh, - I'm home, I made it,
I made it, I made it, I made it,
Hey, I made it, Dave, welcome home,
I'm here, and,,, I missed grace, didn't I?
- Sure did, - Yeah, you did,
- We just finished, - Oh, sorry, Pops,
That's that Y2K thing, you know?
We finally figured it all out, didn't happen,
But now we gotta unfigure out what we tried to figure out,
Sounds complicated,
Yeah, How was your day, bud?
It was awesome, I made a base for my tank battalion,
- Oh, - Dave, you missed a great story
I told about World War II,
- Yeah? - Did I ever tell you
what I did in the war?
Oh, well, I'm sure you have a couple of times,
Enlighten me again now,
Well, well, yeah,
Oh, well, honey, you forgot the cheese,
- Come on, - Oh, yes, sorry,
You're getting forgetful,
I'm gonna,,, I'm gonna help her with that,
- Ah, great, - It's a lot of cheese,
Hey, you okay?
- I'm okay, I'm fine, - You sure?
- Uh-huh, Oh, yes, I'm good, - Ooh, don't buy it,
They're doing good,
So I'm gonna be doing good 'cause I'm going in,
All right, my lady?
- Stand back, - Oh, nope,
I need the shirt,
Yes, ma'am,
You ruined my line though,
Come on, big entrance,
Private Smith reporting for duty!
Whoa, Oh, wait a second, wait a second,
Oh, what about the,,,? Oh, no, but this guy--
Well, I'm climbing up the hill,
Your fort is looking cool,
Thanks man, wanna come over and play?
Can't, gotta go to my grandma's, but when I get back, we can,
All right, I'll be here,
Oh, I forgot,
That bully, Jimmy, in our school,
you know, the wedgeanator?
Yeah, I know him,
Unfortunately, Why?
He has taken over the whole lot at Boone Park,
He says no one can play there unless they fight him for it,
And it's for keeps, He's already beat Craig
and some other guy,
I didn't even know he had an army,
I thought he just bullied kids,
Dang, Craig had some cool stuff, and he lost it all?
Yup, all of it,
Wow, I wish there was a way
we could get Craig's army back,
For keeps, for keeps!
I got your army!
You have no power,
I am powerful!
For keeps, Chaz!
They're mine, they're all mine,
For keeps, for keeps,
Chaz, they're all mine!
They're all mine, Chaz!
Yeah, little Jimmy took them all!
Dad!
Oh, my gosh,
It was just a dream,
Oh, my gosh, that was scary,
Hey, bud, Bad dream?
Yeah, there was this, there was this big ugly guy
and he had this huge vacuum,
And he was sucking up all of my things,
all of my army men,
And he was laughing about it, and it was really creepy,
- Yeah, - And there was fighting and,,,
Oh, but it's okay, it's okay,
It's just a dream, It's just a dream, okay?
Hey, when I was your age
and I would have bad dreams, you know what I would do?
I would replay them, but rewrite the story, okay?
So if there was a big ugly, creepy dude,
I'd be like, "Hey, big, ugly, creepy dude,
You no match for me, that's right,
I'm gonna get my lightning sword with my space knight,"
"That's right, and I'll come in and I'll get him,"
Ha ha ho, ha ha,
"Oh, no, I'm big, ugly, creepy dude, I'm going away,"
I'll be like, "Yeah, totally awesome,"
See? We win the day,
That's what soldiers do,
All right? So let's pray too, okay?
Lord, we just pray against big, ugly,
creepy dudes coming into our dreams,
And we pray that we have a good night's sleep
and we have an amazing night,
Yeah, amen,
- Amen, - Okay, all right,
- Love you, Dad, - You got this, bud,
I love you too,
All right, don't let those dudes try to get ya!
Totally awesome,
Goodnight, love you,
Man, I had a terrible dream last night,
I dreamed that Jimmy beat me in my battle
and took all my army men, everything,
And there was this old guy
and he was sucking up everything with a vacuum,
And the vacuum was so old that just that
made it sound like it was just gonna explode!
Well, look who it is,
Loser one and loser two,
Where's your buddy Craig?
Still crying 'cause I defeated him and took his guys?
No,
You know my army's the biggest army here,
It's gonna keep getting bigger because I play for keeps,
I'll battle you anytime, anywhere,
I'm not scared of you or your wimpy army,
Well, there's mighty, big talk,
So where's your army?
Remember your dream?
Man with hose, ring a bell? Well, there he is,
I'm not scared of him,
Let's combine our armies and take him out,
So I am scared, I'm not afraid to say it,
I'm not fighting him and losing my stuff,
Well, there's a smart kid,
'cause I'll destroy any army that fights me,
Not mine, no,
You've been building this fort for weeks, months, who knows?
Then it's settled,
I'll give you a week to build your fort
and your army against my army,
Next Saturday, 10:00 o'clock,
Oh, I'll be there,
Good,
Remember, we play for keeps,
What did you do?
You can't beat that,
That guy makes me so mad,
And we, we can beat him!
I told you, I'm not fighting him,
I'm not losing my stuff,
Some friend you are,
Go ahead and tuck tail and run home,
I'm battling him with or without you,
He's going down,
We're still friends, right?
No way, why so gloomy, buddy?
Because Zach is a doodoo head!
What was all that about?
Apparently Zach is a doodoo head,
- Zach? - Yeah,
Zach's a doodoo head,
His words, not mine,
I'm sure they'll figure it out,
Yeah, we figured it out,
Remember? You thought I was a doodoo head?
I didn't call you a doodoo head,
Well, no, but it was during the proposal,
I mean, it was kind of awkward,
Not awkward, you're not awkward,
Yeah, no,
Old Chaz here is fighting Jimmy
at a lot on Saturday at 10:00,
- Oh, no, - Don't do it, man,
That Jimmy is whacked,
Yeah, he took everything,
It was over in like five minutes,
You can't beat him,
He has thousands of men,
That kid, Rex, don't miss,
He's a pitcher on their team and their team is undefeated,
You know what?
I'm gonna beat Jimmy one way or another, okay?
So I'm tired of him bullying us,
So with or without you, he's going down,
Yeah, but how?
Don't worry about it, you're out,
I'm out, but I'm still your friend,
I don't think so,
Friends don't turn their backs on friends,
You can have my guys,
Now, he's a friend,
- You can use mine, - Mine too,
Let's take a stand against this guy,
I'll help,
Who's tired of him?
- I am, - Me too,
I've got a plan,
Meet me in my place after school,
- Oh, I'll be there, - I'll try,
Chaz, I've got your back,
Trust me,
Okay, thanks, Phoebe,
Okay, class, settle down,
Get ready for morning announcements,
- Hey, Mom, - Hey, how was school?
Pretty good,
Ah!
Yeah?
I have some friends coming over,
- Oh, that's fine, - They're helping me
plan the fight with Jimmy this weekend,
A fight?
Oh, yeah, he's passing out flyers,
but he isn't gonna know what hit him,
I,,, don't want you fighting someone,
Oh, no, no, no, no,
Not that type of fight,
- Ah, okay, - No, a fight with army men
against him this weekend,
Okay, all right,
- Yeah, - Well, that makes more sense,
Yeah, no, we're battling him because he's a bully,
He always takes everyone's army men,
Well, ah, fun fact,
I had a bully when I was your age,
and she would pull my hair every day,
And then,,, we became best friends,
You became,,, What?
How?
Well, I probably shouldn't be telling you this,
but,,, I bopped her in the nose,
So I need to bop him in the nose?
No, no, no, no, no, no,
No, please don't,
Stand your ground and then maybe you'll be best friends,
- Hey, I think you got this, - Oh, Phoebe's here,
Okay, well, you go, We'll be in the background,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you go have fun,
Love you,
Okay, it's a start,
Now we have to ask our friends
and maybe even our parents to help,
We're gonna need a lot more if we're gonna beat him,
So meet back here tomorrow after school,
Bring everything you can,
We're gonna need it,
Don't forget about my army,
Oh yeah, bring it tomorrow so I can see it,
You'll be commanding your army,
Zach commanding his army, so I will be commanding mine,
Trust me, I've got you,
Okay, but I don't think Zach is fighting with us,
He said that he didn't wanna lose his troops,
Who's that?
Graveyard of fallen comrades,
Every time a soldier gets blown up, I bury them here,
Get to digging, they could be a zombie army,
Kind of like that, army of the undead,
Sorry, guys, duty calls,
Wow, that is a lot of zombies,
They're not zombies,
My grandpa always says, "A soldier never dies,"
So they were never dead,
They were plastic anyways,
Zombie army sounds cooler,
We're gonna get killed,
Nah, I got you,
Geez, they gotta be annihilate, Ah,
Hey, you guys having fun?
I was about to bring these snacks out, do you want any?
No, ma'am, we're on a mission to find army men,
Don't you have enough?
Mom, say that all the army men
on the porch equals one division,
The person we're going against has 5, maybe even 10,
Then why would you fight such a big army?
Because he's a bully,
Mom, he pushed Phoebe down for no reason today,
He pushed me down because I told him
that he has a small army and that I could beat him,
- Did you tell a teacher? - No, Mom,
He gives Danny here a wedgie every day,
Dude,
And his dad is rich,
so he knows he can get away with stuff,
Also, he does it when the teacher isn't around,
Well, we probably need to tell someone about this,
Tell someone what? What, what's going on?
We are getting ready for the big battle on Saturday,
Oh, the big bat-battle,
What, what battle?
Wait, you didn't tell your dad?
What time is it?
Well, how about you guys go and have some fun
and I'll fill your dad in, okay?
Come on, guys, let's go,
He is having a fight with this bully at school,
- And-- - There's wedgies
and battling going on, battling wedgies?
- About the wedgies, - Yeah,
Well, no, they're like army men
and they're gonna do like a little switcheroos,
You can't give army men wedges,
- Wait, - That doesn't work like that,
Hey, Chaz, got something for you,
Oh, cool,
I told my nanny about the fight,
She said I should join you and bought you these,
She bought me some too,
Your grandma's so cool,
So are you fighting with me?
I'll fight with you as long as I command my army
and you command your army,
We fight until the end together,
- Never give up, - Never!
Oh, some guys came over, you know, brought some army men,
Danny and Phoebe had a couple hundred guys,
- Phoebe had army guys? - Yeah,
And you wanna know what's weird?
She kept looking at me and saying that she has my back,
And you wanna know what's even weirder?
She said that she'd command her army,
Army? Maybe she likes you,
Careful, Oh, hey!
You found it,
Well, sorry, bud,
It's actually just the box and a couple of army men,
The castle is gone,
Okay, thanks for trying,
This is still cool though,
The other kid has one, I saw it from across the street,
Yeah, it was cool,
But I remember that it tips over pretty easy,
So I bet a dirt clod right over the top of it
would take it out,
- Good intel, - All right, take care,
And that was the beginning of World War II,
Oh, before I forget, did anyone bring Chaz any army men?
Okay, you may give them to him now,
Wow!
Oh, my gosh,
That's a lot of army men,
There's more?
This is awesome,
Whoa,
We're all rooting for you,
Here, take these,
They belong to my nephew,
He's all grown up now and he doesn't play with 'em anymore,
Thanks, Ms, Mullens,
- Just make sure you win, - I will,
Wow!
Let's load 'em up in your book bag,
Load 'em up, man, Let's do this,
I'll pour these in here,
Some full, some full,
It's completely full,
With this many, we might actually have a chance,
I think we do,
Okay, now let's get back to class,
Okay,
All right, back to World War II,
Everyone open your books, please,
Come on, I, I like peaches,
But some might say I'm allergic to apples,
And I don't even like apples,
Hey, guys, how's it going?
Good,
Good, haven't seen you at the lot yet,
Fight's still on, right?
10:00am, Saturday,
Just wanna make sure you haven't chickened out yet,
Oh, we'll be there,
Just to let you know,
my dad has marked the field of my side and your side,
It's outlined with caution tape,
Okay, that's cool,
What was that?
Nobody got assaulted,
No wedgies,
Jimmy's body has been "tooken" by an alien,
Just so you know,,,
simply faking of giving you a beat down
gives me a tangly feeling inside,
And they're peace, you have no idea,
He's back,
Well, what do you think?
I don't think it's as big as his army,
but I think we got a chance,
Well, maybe someone else will bring you
some army men tomorrow,
Why don't we go check that new kid's house?
I bet he has some,
After him, maybe let's go to Vick's house,
Oh yeah, I bet he has some too,
- We can go there after, - All right,
Hey, Lisa, my darling daughter,
Can I borrow the car please?
No, but I'll take you,
Where do you wanna go?
Oh, I just want to go up on to the corner to the VFW,
I got some of my boat buddies up there I wanna get with,
Okay, let me see where Chaz is,
Okay,
Hey, man, I gotta go,
but I'll catch back up with you when I get back, okay?
- Okay, I'll see you, - All right, come on,
Yeah, he's playing with the next door neighbor's kids,
so he should be in in a few minutes
and then we'll head out, how about that?
All right, cool,
I'll meet you outside,
All right, sounds good, Beep, beep, beep, beep,
Yeah,
Pull in here for a second,
I gotta run inside for a minute, pick something up, okay?
- Okay, - Pop open the trunk
- for me here, all right? - Yeah, okay,
I'll put some stuff back there,
- All righty, - Thank you,
Okay, can you believe it?
Yeah, they are, they're not,
- Hey, Top, - Hi, Zip, how are you?
- How you doing? - Terrific, terrific,
Top, do you finish that project we talked about?
Yeah, they're in the back of my truck,
It's open, take all the boxes,
Wonderful, wonderful,
How many did you make?
- Enough, - Good,
Well, I really appreciate the work that you
and everybody did, and I know my grandson
is gonna go crazy when he sees all that,
No problem,
We met, knocked it right out,
Old Zippy here even made the grandson something special,
Her being Navy and all,
Ah, great,
Well, listen, see you tomorrow for Bingo?
- Yep, see you, - Roger that,
All right, take care,
All right,
Yep,
All right, let's go,
What's with all that stuff?
I'll tell you later,
Okay,
- What are in those boxes? - It's a surprise,
I like surprises,
Well, listen, buddy, you're gonna be crazy
about this surprise, buddy,
Over the top,
Yeah, well, I've definitely noticed you've been stuck
in your room the last few days doing something,
- Oh, really? - Uh-huh,
Yeah, yeah,
You'll see after dinner,
All right, all right, I'll stop pressuring you,
Yeah, someone's in a good mood,
I just finished a project I was working on,
Oh, what project?
You'll see, it's a little something,
Tell us after dinner, right, Dad?
Oh, yeah, I'll show you after dinner,
Don't worry about it,
I can't wait to see it,
Hey Mom, what are we having for dinner?
Fried chicken, Well, go get washed up,
We're almost ready,
Oh, yeah,
Oh, fried chicken, mm,
I hope you made me an extra spicy piece,
- Oh, I did, extra hot, - Oh, boy,
Well, that was some good chicken,
Delicious,
It should be, it was mom's recipe,
And I knew it tasted good,
Great job, sweetheart,
So are you gonna show us what you've been working on?
- Yeah, - Yeah,
Well, before I show you all,,,
Chaz, did I ever tell you what I did in World War II?
You made tanks or something?
Yeah, well, I was in a thing called Operation Bodyguard,
We made phony troops and tanks to fool the Germans,
And we certainly did,
We never lost one person,
because they thought they were bombing real troops,
It was amazing,
Wait, we're talking about you in history class,
Wait till I tell Ms, Mullens, she's gonna flip,
She told us all about your unit,
Really? That's terrific,
We were a ghost unit, only a few men,
but we made all those phony tanks and troops,
So you got a big battle coming up on Saturday, don't you?
Against superior numbers?
- Yes, sir, - All right, come on,
Follow me, whoop,
Okay, I think,
Maybe just one more piece of chicken,
All right, come on in,
Gee, grandpa, you did all this for me?
Absolutely, Come Saturday morning,
he won't know what's real or fake,
Wow, he won't be expecting this,
- Not a chance, - This is a great idea,
Yeah, this is awesome, this is awesome,
Now I have a little surprise too,
Not as awesome as this, but a little something,
- What is that? - You wanna see?
Yeah, what is it?
- Come on! - In the garage,
- Come on! - All right, all right,
Wow, Dad,
Well, I know you only had the box of Navarone,
so I thought I would give you the "Guns of Navarone,"
Wow, Dad, this is awesome!
- Yeah, well, - It's,,, This is one big floor,
Well, okay, it is,
but that's because I couldn't remember how big it was,
so I just kept building and building,
Why didn't you tell me?
Well, you can't keep a secret,
Yeah, that's for sure, She's a blabbermouth,
I'm caught, Oh, no,
That is the cherry on top of it, I'll tell you,
You know, if I was up against you,
I'd be bombing the daylights out of it,
That's the idea,
Thanks, Dad, it's perfect,
Well, now, Chaz, you gotta come up with a plan
to get your troops onto the battlefield
without him knowing about it,
Wait until I tell the guys,
they're gonna be so shocked,
We have a meeting tomorrow after school,
Can I see what you made me?
I need to get a count,
Don't worry about that,
I got a piece of paper on my desk
that has the number of troops that we made for you,
So that's taken care of,
Now, the other thing we did is we made fake maps
and dropped them behind enemy lines,
It fooled the daylights out of the Germans,
I feel bad for Jimmy,
I'm starting to feel sorry for Jimmy too,
I wish, He's gonna get creamed,
You done good,
Oh, I need you to do me a favor,
but you're not gonna like it,
What is it?
I need you to act like this,
No, it's real, so he thinks it's real,
It fools them out completely,
Roger that,
This is top secret, so don't let anyone have it,
Especially not Jimmy,
This is gonna hurt,
Jimmy's gonna beat the crap out of me,
Just do it for the team, man,
Hey, Ms, Mullins,
We need a referee for the battle on Saturday,
Are you able to do it?
Well, I'd be honored,
What time do you need me there?
Let's see, the battle starts at 10:00,
so, yeah, can you be there at 9:00?
I'll be there,
The empty lot in Boone Park?
Yes, ma'am,
Oh, my grandfather was in the Army thing in World War II,
The, oh, the ghost unit that we were talking about in class,
Really?
Well, I would love to meet him,
He'll be there on Saturday, you can meet him then,
Cool,
Dang, that kid is good,
That was easy,
I thought for sure I was gonna get a wedgie or something,
Yeah, shows me spies are everywhere,
Yeah, oh, I have some news for you,
but I can't show you here,
I'll show you when we get to my house, okay?
- Tell me, - Can't,
Sure you can, just tell me,
- Nope, - Come on, please,
You'll find out soon enough,
Just wait, trust me,
You're gonna love it,
What are y'all talking about?
Nothing, Chaz won't tell me something,
Just the teensy-weensy little something,
What, is it like a secret?
Oh, do tell,
Look what you started,
Okay, guys, remember, my army on the right,
Danny's army in the middle, and Zach's army's on the left,
We're gonna have FTs scattered throughout
and the big guns are gonna be
in the back, so they're harder to hit,
Now, everyone memorize this plan,
Remember what you have to do, got it?
Got it,
I have a question,
What are FTs and where do I get them from?
Oh, my gosh,
I was so excited, I forgot to show y'all something,
Follow me,
"This is my commandment
that you love one another as I have loved you,
Greater love has no one than this,
than to lay down one's life for his friends,"
Come in,
Look, guys,
Oh, no, no, no, no, I must have dreamt it,
Relax, Chaz,
Moved it into the garage,
Oh, oh, man,
That freaked me out,
Okay, my dad and my grandpa made me something,
Guys, come on, let's go,
Enjoy the surprise, boys, And girl,
Well, this is a game changer,
Craig, those are FTs,
My grandpa did this to the Germans in World War II,
and we're gonna do it to Jimmy,
This is the plan, guys,
And in the fourth quarter, we crush him,
I don't see space for my army anywhere,
Where am I gonna set up?
You said I could command my army,
Dang, Phoebe, I thought you gave us all your guys,
That wasn't my army,
Those were guys I don't play with,
My army's the best army, you'll see,
Well, how about this?
If Jimmy's beating us,
I'll let you come in in the fourth quarter, okay?
I'll be there,
Has anyone seen Phoebe's army?
No,
I wonder why she's so secretive about it,
Yeah,
So they gave this all to you last night?
Yeah, my grandpa made the FTs and my dad made the fort,
So with all the FTs, this is what we're gonna do, okay?
We have four quarters in this war,
In between each quarter, we get a few minutes
to add some troops and clean up the dead,
Now, the last quarter, we have to put everything out,
Flood the field of battle,
We have 15 minutes,
Oh, we're gonna win this,
Now the only problem is, how are we gonna get
all this out there without him noticing?
I've got an idea,
Come on, guys,
Stop, Wait,
Ah, all right, here's what we're gonna do,
You keep an eye on the kids from near this angle,
You stay here,
I'm gonna go over there, hide behind that tree
and I'll watch 'em from there,
- Okay, - Okay,
Make sure nothing happens to 'em,
- All right, - Do me a favor,
Don't drive away without me,
That should fix it,
Do you always carry a can of grease with you?
I mean, yeah,
You never know when you're gonna need it,
Now, come on,
I swore I smell my grandpa,
Why would it smell like your grandpa
in the middle of the night?
I can see everything,
Looks like everything's going according to plan,
You didn't think I was gonna let you go out there
in the middle of the night all by yourselves, did you?
No, Dad, sorry,
I just didn't think you were gonna let me go,
Just wanna make sure you're okay,
I'm sure the other kids didn't ask their parents either,
But, look, you can always come to me,
Thanks, Dad,
You know what's crazy?
I thought I smelled grandpa out there,
You did,
I was so close I could've touched you,
Wow, that's pretty good, Grandpa,
Remind me never to play hide and seek with you,
So everything ready?
Everything except Phoebe's army,
She said she'd bring it tomorrow,
but I'm hoping we don't need it,
Fingers crossed,
Okay,
It'll work, believe me,
All right, let's get to bed,
Come on, don't tell your mom,
I'm here,
Well, you definitely look ready for battle,
Yeah, big day, huh?
A little nervous,
Don't be nervous, you're gonna do great,
Yeah, seriously,
You're gonna do super, okay?
Hey, let's pray,
Grandpa, what do you say?
Okay, Dear Lord, for be thy will,
give Chaz here victory over his enemies,
Amen,
- Amen, - Amen, all right,
All right, well, I made breakfast,
so let's just eat it on the way,
- Sounds good, - All right, let's go,
- What are we waiting for? - Come on!
Let's do it,
You know, thanks for doing this,
Oh, well, I gotta tell you,
I have never refereed a dirt clod battle before,
Have you played a dirt clod battle before?
When I was a kid,
You're here just to keep things fair,
We throw dirt clods at each other's army men,
You just set the time and how many dirt clods we can throw,
Whoever has zero by the end of the time wins,
That sounds easy enough,
This is my parents,
- Hi, - Oh, hi,
Well, you know, I mean, no,
- Yeah, - Okay,
Is this who I think it is?
Yeah, this is my grandpa that I told you about,
It is a pleasure to meet you,
So nice to meet you,
Your grandson tells me you were in a,,,
a ghost unit in World War II,
Oh, yeah, we were masters in the art of deception,
We fooled them Germans like nothing,
I would love to have you come to speak
to my classes in school sometime,
Really?
I would be honored it and humbled
to be doing that for you,
- Hey, Ms, Mullins, - Ah!
Hello,
I didn't think you were gonna show,
Ready to get beat?
You know, Jimmy,
your army's gonna look real good in my backyard,
Jimmy, you did all this?
- I sure did, - We have ten minutes,
Is there anything I need to know from you?
I have just those two boxes right over there
of reserved armies and the rest will be thrown with me,
Okay, do you have any rules?
Yeah, your army has to be inside the caution tape
to be able to fight,
Got it, Well, good luck, Jimmy,
I'm gonna go see what he has to say,
We got this,
Well, I didn't expect this either,
Hey, Chaz, you have five minutes until we start,
Do I need to know anything from you?
Yes, Ms, Mullins,
My army's mostly fake, paper and cardboard cutouts,
They look real, but they aren't,
I'm doing Operation Bodyguard on the enemy,
Well, that's cool,
I'm glad someone's paying attention in class,
Do you have any reserves?
Yes, ma'am, buried under the ground
so he doesn't know what we have,
Show me, I need to understand what we're doing
just to make sure it's fair,
Okay, I didn't even see that,
Troops are in marked area,
Just under it, seems okay,
Operation Bodyguard,
Got it, very sneaky,
Yes, ma'am,
Oh, and Zach is my other bomber,
Just in case we need her, Phoebe is my last reserve army,
which I guess she's sitting on,
Okay, truth's been shown to me,
Now it's about that time,
Finish up, good luck,
Okay, everyone,
My name is Ms, Mullins,
I teach at your sons' school,
They've asked me to be the referee to this dirt clod war,
Rule one, Jimmy and Rex will be throwing on this side only
and Chaz and Zach will be throwing from this side,
Rule number two, no limit on dirt clods
you throw until the whistle blows,
Rule three, all troops that have been blown up
will be picked up and removed from the field of play
and deposited inchoate away from the troop area,
This battle is for keeps,
Whoever wins, gets the other kid's army,
That's it, pull back the tarp,
I can do this,
Dang, I didn't know they had a army this big,
Me neither,
Jimmy, you ready?
Let's do it,
Chaz, you ready?
Sir, yes, sir,
All right, that's ma'am,
Yes, ma'am,
On the whistle,
It's war,
No! Get that truck,
- Oh, no, - Destroy their army,
- Get it, - Take down their army,
- I got one, - You guys right there,
- Get the front! - Destroy them,
That's what I'm talking about,
Come on,
Go, Zach! Come on, destroy them,
Come on, come on!
Get the front!
- Destroy them, - Take that!
Go, Zach, go, Zach!
Destroy them, Come on!
Take it down, take it down!
First quarter, collect everything that is dead,
Get it off the field and away from your regular troops,
Your grandpa was right,
He didn't even go after any of the real guys,
He was going for the big stuff,
He got us good,
Let's just hope he doesn't realize what's going on,
Let's go put some troops out over there,
They want that area out,
Yeah,
Chaz,
Dang, Chaz, he blew up half your army,
Phoebe, don't say stuff like that,
They might hear you,
Good job, Phoebe,
Have your troops ready,
Oh, they're ready,
- Jimmy, you ready? - Yep,
- Chaz, you ready? - Yes, ma'am,
Pull open the tarp,
- You can do this! - Go, get it!
You can do this, man,
Come on, that's one,,,
Get the front,
Get those!
Oh, no, oh, no,
Come on, get the truck, get the truck,
Come on, Zach, come on, Zach,
I wasn't expecting all this,
Yeah, me neither, Huh?
You want something to drink?
- Yeah, - It's a little dusty,
After you, no, please,
You want anything to drink?
Yes, don't forget your old man, come on,
- All right, okay, - All right, come on,
Five minutes,
Five minutes, guys,
Five minutes,
That's for him,
Oh, got you a popcorn set,
Popcorn, what are you kidding?
I was thirsty, I didn't want something salty,
Sorry, Pops,
It's fine,
Hey, will you make sure Danny,
Craig and Phoebe are ready for this next round?
Oh, they're ready, look,
- You eat it then, - Okay, all right,
I like popcorn,
You can have mine,
Here, switcheroo for you,
Thank you, I don't like grape,
What about this?
- What flavor is this? - I don't know,
- but it's great, - It's raspberry,
it's raspberry, Pops,
All right, all right, fine,
Everybody ready?
Hey, Chaz, wanna surrender?
I don't wanna kill all your men,
Time out,
Time!
Bring out the stuff,
All of it,
Yes, yeah, except the big guns,
We save that for Phoebe,
All right,
Yeah,
Now!
Come on, come on, let's do this,
Let's do this, let's destroy this,
Come on,
Come on! Come on, Chaz!
Go, Chaz! Go, Chaz!
Ah, let's go, come on,
No!
Go, Phoebe!
Come on!
We got 'em good this time,
What, y'all think you've won?
We've got more troops than you,
You'll hardly have anything to put out,
We got 'em good that time,
Yeah,
Okay, Phoebe, you're on,
Let's see those troops,
About time,
Ten minutes,
Let's go, girls!
I told you I had your back,
Wow,
Oh, we're in trouble,
Girl power!
Yeah!
What's happening?
Where did you all get that from?
Something's wrong here,
I call time,
Ms, Mullins, they're cheating,
How are they cheating?
They had one box of reserves,
That's all I was showing,
Where did that big thing come from?
That definitely wasn't a reserve,
Well, Jimmy, they buried their reserves last night
so you wouldn't see them,
But they showed them to me this morning
before the start of the war,
So it counts,
That's their reserve?
You know what? I can't even be mad,
We were outplayed, but it's not over yet,
We can still win,
Get them back, no,
Come on, Come on,
Come on, Zach, come on,
Go, Chaz, Come on,
Go, Chaz,
Chaz and Zach!
And the winner is Chaz!
All right!
Congratulations, Chaz,
And Zach, Danny and Phoebe,
She won this for us,
She's the real hero,
Who knew she had this big of an army?
Yeah,
Yay!
- Congratulations, guys! - We did it!
God, that was great,
That was awesome,
Dusty, but awesome,
Next time we could do water balloons,
I'll tell you,
I like that, yeah,
That that was a successful Operation Bodyguard,
just like we did in World War II,
Well?
I think we need some celebratory pizza,
Pizza, yeah,
Can I bring my friends?
Of course, you can, Yeah,
Oh, my goodness,
Did somebody say free pizza?
- Hey, Jimmy, - Hey,
So epic battle Saturday, right?
It was,,, cool,
Nice job faking me out,
Oh, that was my grandpa's idea,
So next Saturday, same time?
But maybe minus the food trucks this time,
Yeah, my dad have,,, May have gone a little overboard
and it would be fun to do it again,
but I don't really have an army anymore,
Well, we could give you some,
Well, after Craig and the others get their army back,
but so we can all play,
Seriously?
Seriously,
Nah, we played for keeps and,,, I was a jerk,
That is kind of true,
But people and rules can change, right?
Yeah, Yeah, they can,
Cool?
Cool,
So where'd you get such a big army?
Well, the pink one was Phoebe's,
I figured, That was kind of epic,
Yeah,
Oh, and you're gonna laugh, but,,,
But what?
So you know how they used fake troops
in Operation Bodyguard during World War II?
Yeah,
So did I,
What, fake troops?
All of them?
About half of them,
I never knew,
From where I was standing, they looked real,
And your reserves,,, Man, y'all are good,
I'll be ready for you next time,
I'm sure you will,
And this time let's not play for keeps,
Let's just set 'em up and knock 'em down,
Okay, Wait, what if we did a water balloon war next week?
Oh, I'll be there,
And Chaz?
Yeah?
Thanks,
No problem,
To lay down your life for another person
is probably the greatest thing that any of us could do,
especially while defending our country,
Going through the chief's initiation,
we were questioned on in scenarios
if the ship was to take a hit
and you had to get 'em out of there,
but somebody had to stay in to lock it down,
what would you do?
Of course, most senior guy let the junior guys go,
In the service, you meet people
that under normal circumstances
you may never have ran into these people,
You learn about different things
and you become close with them,
And then you realize, if, you know, if there was a fire,
a hurricane, or any kind of natural disaster or even a war,
you would give your life to save that person's life,
You learn what it means to fight
for the person next to you,
They become your family,
You're really doing this ultimate sacrifice
for someone who's in your family,
Because of what I learned being in the military,
that I would have laid down my life,