Bill, you stay here,
Thank you for calling 911,
We're experiencing a high volume of calls,
Please continue to hold,
Party's over, you spoiled shit,
Cops are on their way, I warned you,
Hello?
What's going on in there?
What the,,,
Hey, hey, hey, stop!
Hello?
Oh, Bill,
Bill, wait!
911, What is your emergency?
I, I'm sorry,
Hi, I, uh-
What is your emergency, ma'am?
- Uh, uh, uh- - Ma'am?
No, Bill, wait!
Ma'am, what is your emergency?
♪ Always acting strange ♪
♪ When I'm 'round you ♪
♪ Going 'round you ♪
♪ Thinking it's time to go ♪
♪ I don't know though, do you know ♪
♪ Happiness in liquid form ♪
♪ I'm drinking it down ♪
Ah!
♪ I just wanna drown ♪
Uh, huh,
♪ I know I can't beat happiness in ♪
Uh, ah, ah,
Oaxaca Flaca!
- What's up, Cliff? - You looking good,
I'm trying,
You, uh,,,
You're here for your shit? Yeah,
I got it,
So, what's up, bruh?
Are you still working promotions at the bar?
Yeah,
When are you gonna do a Reggaeton night?
Aw man, the Silicon Beach bros
just love like tropical house music now,
Yeah, Reggaeton is tropical,
Yeah, no, I'm talking more like Kygo,
or you know what, actually everyone's really into Rufus,
Look, I have no idea what you're saying right now,
Uh-huh,
But I have exactly what you asked for,
This is a futon? This is beautiful, man,
Thank you so much,
My buddy's gonna love it, he just got a divorce,
Ouch, divorce is rough,
When my old lady left, I had to get six tattoos redone,
'Kay,
Yeah, well, no tattoos, but the old crew,
we're gonna get back together, you know,
show him that he's loved by getting super fucked up,
That's fucking beautiful, bruh,
You know, because you're such a good friend,
I'm gonna throw in something a little extra,
- Whoa, is this, um, uh- - Yes,
- Uh,,, - A credenza,
- A credenza,
- A creden, - A cr, do you wanna get high?
Yes, so bad,
Fuck that wannabe Michael Bay motherfucker,
"Symposium" is my show, Caroline
and he's trying to take it away from me,
Our show, Samantha, Our show, remember?
You know what I mean, Caroline,
I'm reading Alan's email now,
"Demographics on this show skew to male viewers,"
Wow, what garbage,
Yeah, he's asked me to step back and consult,
Can you believe that shit?
So I set up a meeting with the "Beaten Path" guys
and if I get them on board, Alan is out,
and he can go straight to hell,
You set up a meeting without telling me?
Calm down, mom,
"Beaten Path" is in Venice,
We have a dinner at Soho House tonight,
Crap, I forgot,
I have a thing, I can't make it,
Can we push that to next week?
Or I mean, I could just go,
I think I can handle a meeting on my own,
No, I, I definitely think I need to be there,
Can we push it to next week? Please,
- Fine, - Thank you, talk soon,
- Hey, - Hey,
Uh, Cliff text you? Yeah,
That'll be 47,50,
Okay, so, you goin' or what?
For a bit, I have a thing at 9:00,
You? Hey, sexy,
Uh,,,
Yeah, same, You need my ticket?
- Troy! - Yes, yeah, yeah,
Uh,,,
Same, yeah, I gotta, I gotta meet with these tech guys
in Mar Vista about a new club concept,
$10, And that smile,
How come his is so cheap?
I have half as much stuff,
Are you on the wall?
What's that got to do with anything?
You pay full price,
- Sorry, - There it is,
Jesus, Troy, I gotta go,
No, no, no, no, no,
Uh, have you reached out to Paul?
No, I didn't really know what to say,
Yeah, me either, Been a long time,
We're still waiting for the final inspections
to come back, but I have been assured everything is
up to code,
I am so excited to live here, I could just die,
Oh, shit,
Paul, what are you doing here?
Uh, you know him?
What is he doing in our house?
Sorry, I forgot my shower head,
This shit's expensive,
Oh, wait, babe,
No, he, no, he and his wife, they are the owners,
Yeah, Paul built the succulent wall in the back,
- Oh, Paul! - Yeah,
Oh my God, I love that wall,
It's seriously impressive, bro,
Mad props,
Well, uh, it was good to see you,
Oh, actually, uh, Paul, um, could you fill us in
on the neighbourhood schools?
We, we are from Seattle, Yeah,
So far, we've checked out Mayberry,
- Mayberry, - And we're looking
at charters, too, Yeah, I, I can supply you
with a list, really, You know, we don't have kids
yet but we're planners so any help
you can give us would be really appreciated,
There's no way that you two are staring a family here,
- Wait, what? Why? - Excuse me,
- Excuse me? - Is, is MS-13 nearby
or something? Doesn't matter,
Um, excuse me, Paul, Paul?
If there's something we should be concerned about,
I would like to know,
I'm sorry,
You just moved here, you're asking for advice,
I get it,
Did I hear you guys say you're planners?
- Yes, - Yeah,
Yes? Okay, okay, this will be easy,
- That's us, - Um, the second you sit down
and really think about it, it will be painfully clear
just how expensive it is to raise kids in LA
and you'll want to wait few years to save that money,
But it's a good thing, because during that time,
the two of you as a couple will get to really enjoy
the LA lifestyle, you know, go buck wild, right?
Yeah, yeah!
Hang out with some interesting people,
the wealthy, the eccentric, the famous,
Ah, I see that, I saw that,
No, no, no, don't be embarrassed,
Come on, we all move here to LA in the hopes of meeting
a celebrity, you know,
And they're out there,
Chris Pine,
Chris Pine, by the way, he gets coffee
right down the street, That's good, that's great,
Yeah, you know him, don't ya?
- Yeah, she knows, - Yep,
Also, during this time, you will have fantasies
for other people,
It's human nature, there's really no avoiding it,
But you'll fight it,
You know, you'll do everything you should to fight it,
Uh, taking a cross-fit classes together,
sound baths are helpful,
Sex videos! Those work wonders,
I highly recommend that,
Kinda anything to drown out these terrible ideas
of infidelity that are clearly already brewing
in the back of your minds,
'Cause this will work for a time
because you will still be in LA,
surrounded by all these beautiful people,
living way better lives than you,
Until one day, the inevitable will barrel into you,
driving an AMG from his house
in the hills to drill your wife with his nine-inch cock
under your seriously impressive succulent wall, bro,
So, yeah,
I highly doubt you will start a fuckin' family here,
Or maybe you will, I don't know,
Thanks for buying my house,
Nine inches,
Oh, Are you staking your territory?
You nervous?
No, it's just that or I have to cut a bitch
if they look at you,
I kinda wanna see that,
No, it's too messy and relocating is a bitch,
I can't tell if you're being serious or not,
Is it weird that it turns me on?
- No, - No?
'Cause I'm super cute and you're really messed up,
Yeah,
You know, our kids are gonna be monsters,
But like, gorgeous,
Would you wanna have kids with me?
Oh my God, I can feel your heart pounding,
I guess, Maybe, yes, someday, yeah,
Oh my God, I wanna kiss you,
but I don't wanna mess up my lip gloss,
- Buddy! - I'll make room,
Yes, Yes, oh, come here,
- Hey, man, you okay? - Oh hey,
You smell good, Yeah, thanks,
- You look terrible, - Yeah, that is,
But you smell good, Oh, welcome back, man,
I'm so excited you're here,
Watch out for that cactus and welcome, I, okay,
I mean, is this not exactly as you remember it?
- Pretty much, - Oh, wait, uh, this is new,
This is called a credenza,
I know what a credenza is, Cliff,
Of course, of cour, yeah, um, alright!
Well, hey, um, let me show you where you're staying,
Okay, Whoo!
Stay as long as you want, my man,
Mi casa is your casa, Let's get you a beer,
Or I guess, you know, I, I, well, what do you wanna drink?
I mean- Hey, man, I'm kinda tired
and I'm not really in the mood to drink, so,,,
You should have a drink,
it'll help with the smell,
Sam, come on, I'm tell, you gotta put that phone away,
- Yeah, - There is no work here,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
That's what I'm talking about,
- Hi, friend, - Hi,
- You okay? - Quick question,
Uh, when's the last time you hugged a Black man?
Come here, man, come on, show me love,
There you go, Hold my body,
You good? Yeah,
Yeah, I, I, I can't stay long
but I at least wanted to come by and say hi,
Hi, Sam, Troy,
Um, I'm interrupting something?
- Uh-uh, - Mm-mm,
No, I'm interrupting something,
No, you're not, It's not interrupting,
Uh, I'm sorry, Uh, it's just,,,
Cliff didn't tell you we were coming?
- No, - What the fuck?
Who's thirsty?
Guys, hold on, wait, wait, wait,
Don't look at me like that,
He was so sad, he was so sad on the phone,
You know, if we got together I knew that
it would make you happy,
Cliff, this isn't fun for me, okay?
I'm not trying to celebrate it,
Fuck me, I'm sorry,
Also, I'm already holding the beer and it's heavy,
I just need- Heavy?
- Yeah, - Mmm,
You know what I'm saying?
Guys, we're reunited, This is good,
Cheers, Cheers,
- Cheers, - Cheers,
Still does that
on a first swig, Wow,
Ooh, One more thing,
- Cliff, you know, after that? - No, you're gonna love it,
it's in my credenza,
- What? - I don't know, I don't know,
He's really proud of that thing,
Oh, my g,,,
Well, hey, uh, you guys been good?
What's going on?
- Yeah, you know, busy, - Yeah, great,
Same old, same old,
Good, good, good,
Ah, just being here, by the way, makes me crave
your mom's crack cookies,
- Oh, - Oh my God,
those things are so good,
- I know, - So good,
Yeah, I didn't bring any, Sorry,
Oh, fuck, man,
Well, shit, now that you're single,
we really gotta hang out,
I'm plugged up in every spot in LA,
- Uh, - And they're filled with-
- Underage daddy issues, - Exactly,
Yeah, well, ew,
But besides that, he's divorced now
and he needs someone for sex, Okay, Paul,
Don't listen to him,
I know plenty of actual women, if you're really interested,
You're really good at this,
The last woman you introduced him to-
- It's your favourite part, - Yeah, what's her name?
- It's your favourite part, - Yeah, Alice, so-
- Hey, dad, mom, can you guys knock it off?
Uh, I don't need fixing,
What the fuck?
It's game time, motherfuckers,
What the fuck is Gatlopp?
Yeah, sounds like a "Star Trek" creature,
No, I actually googled it and Gatlopp is Swedish
for the gauntlet,
Like, running the gauntlet,
And apparently, the Iroquois used to make their prisoners
run a deadly gauntlet and if one of them
got all the way through, then they'd let everyone go,
Let me guess, no one ever made it through,
But no one ever made it through,
And I'm telling you guys, I looked all over the internet
for this thing,
I could not find one mention of it,
This thing is super rare
and it is the wacky and unpredictable game
to test our knowledge of the world,
our friends, and ourselves,
Guys, I found this today,
It is our destiny,
- That is no one's destiny, - I'm just concerned,
it's the same way, No, no,
Whoa, hold on, shh, shh, shh, guys,
Drinking games used to be our jam,
Yeah, Cliff, used to, Past tense, you know,
We, we have, a couple hours together,
It'd be fun to just- I, actually, I don't have
a couple hours,
I have a work thing, I told you,
Well, we're here for Paul and Paul loves us-
- Dude, no, hard pass, - Fine, fine,
It's stupid, I just thought it'd be fun, you know,
to do something together,
We are doing something together,
- Yeah, - Cliff!
No, it's fine,
I gotta go pee,
So, how long are you staying here?
- Oh, couple weeks, tops, - Mm,
It's weird being here,
It's like, it's like I've regressed,
Also, how does he still have this place?
I have no idea,
Consolation prize for getting cut out of their will?
Whatever, once I get the money from my house, I am gone,
Yeah, I bet you're ready to get rid of that place,
No, not really, It was a great house, you've been there,
Uh, I haven't, actually,
Oh, my lord,
You still have these? Yes, sir, Of course,
Holy shit, We look fantastic,
- Oh, especially you, - Uh-oh,
- Cliff! - Sam!
I'm a working professional,
You can't be broadcasting my mistakes,
That's the point of the mistake wall,
What are you,,, I'm keeping this,
Right, right,
Oh yes, this is the one I like of Paul, right there,
I like that,
This one's- Look at his face,
- This one's much better, - Oh,
- Cliff, you dick! - Yeah, exactly,
You know the rules,
You fall asleep at the house, you get a face dick,
- Sure do, - Fuck that rule,
'Cause I had to go to an audition
with a face dick on my face one time,
- Did, did you get it or,,, - Hell, no,
Oh, wait, Hold on, hold on,
I don't see The Braveheart,
I totally forgotten about that,
- Troy, Troy, - What's up?
- How you doin', man? - Good, good,
Have you, uh, have you seen Alice?
- Nope, - Are you okay?
- Nope, I'm fucked up, - Yeah, you look fucked up,
Um, I'ma get some of that,,,
Yo, your name is Troy, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
You're in that show "JV Squad", right?
Oh, yeah, you got me,
Oh my God, dude,
I loved you in that show, You were hilarious,
Appreciate it, thank you, thank you,
He does appreciate it,
You should ask him what else he's doing,
Yo, so what else is going on, man?
Bigger and better things I'm sure,
There's something in the works, something's in works,
but, man, get yourself a drink,
I'ma be back in here, Have a good time,
- Alright, - Drink up, drink up,
drink up, yes, sir, nice to meet you,
♪ Oh, where do we begin ♪
Holy shit!
Oh, game over, motherfuckers!
Sam! Sam,
Cliff is passed out on the couch,
- It's finally happening, - It's finally happening
and I came prepared,
Gentlemen, I must leave you,
We have business to attend to,
Go, go, go, go!
Out of the way, Cheers, guys!
One, two, three,
Freedom!
Oh man, that was some of our best work,
We did good,
But how could I forget about that?
When was it?
It was that crazy beach party, like eight years ago,
- Oh, eight years ago, - Yeah,
Oh, that's me, I should get going,
No, Sam, it's so early,
Uh, yeah,
Uh, I gotta get going, I do, I do,
You kidding me, man? Come on,
I love you, I love you,
I love you, alright?
You let me know whatever you need,
I got you, Okay,
So just ask me,
I know, I know,
So, yeah,
- Don't, don't, - I, wait,
It's so early,
Hey,
Hey, can you hear me?
I'm at my dad's and you know how the service is up here,
I can hear you fine, What's up?
Sorry to call about this,
but I still need you to sign the divorce papers,
And since you don't have an address,
I was wondering if you can come by our place
and we can all put this behind us,
Okay, anything else?
Yeah, What you did at the house today,
Not everyone needs your opinion, Paul,
Then they shouldn't have asked
for my opinion, Alice, and besides-
- They rescinded their offer, - What?
They're not buying the house anymore,
They can't do that,
They can when we're still in escrow,
Alright, dudes, I'm outta here,
What?
This isn't my fault, Alice,
It doesn't matter, 'cause I was talking to my dad,,,
Hold on,
And he thinks this is a blessing,
We priced way too low, we can probably get another 12%,
It'll just take a few more months to sell,
Great, just, just great,
Did he have any other sage advice on selling my house?
Our house,
And don't forget where the down payment came from,
Paul, you don't sound good,
Are you taking care of yourself?
Babycakes! Where is you?
- I'm talking to Paul, - No way!
Eskimo buddy! Are you fucking kidding me?
Go inside, I'll be back in a sec,
Okay, Bye, Paulie!
Kisses!
Really sorry about that,
Um, please don't hang up yet,
- I'm here, - Okay,
Uh, so Andre and I are going to Napa tomorrow night,
So if you can come by around 10:00 a,m,,
that would be amazing,
Fine,
- Oh, - Oh, um,
Oh, great,
Well, it's good seeing you guys,
I think I'm just gonna- No, we're good, alright,
No, fuck that,
Cliff, the game you have,
Trivia, problem solving and shit?
Yes, I got a hold of that but, I thought you had
that work thing? Nope, I'm changing my mind,
- Oh, - We are gonna get drunk,
We're gonna talk a whole bunch of shit
and then you are gonna forget
about your stupid ex-wife, okay?
Oh my God, I love that idea,
And I love talkin' shit, so,,,
So, what is it gonna be, Paul?
You gonna sit in your room and sulk like a little bitch
or are you gonna get nasty with us?
- Uh, - You little bitch,
- What you gonna do, Paul? - Yo gonna get nasty?
- What you gonna do, Paulie? - You nasty little bitch,
I fuckin' hate you guys,
- No, you love us, - And we love you!
Alright,
- Let's see, - What, like,
they're shot glasses,
Uh, three pepperonis please,
Yes, yes, three,
Uh, Sam, you're not leaving now, right?
- No, - Okay, okay, good,
Yes, and ranch please,
Thank you,
Choose a player piece and place it
at the start of the board,
Roll the die and move your piece to the space
according to the number rolled,
- Alright, I did my job, - Pull a card from the shoe,
Uh, and then flip the timer if required,
The first card gives you a task,
After you've completed said task,
pull a second card from the shoe
to receive either punishment or reward,
Do exactly as instructed,
- Okay, that sounds great, - Well, hold on,
There's more rules, Yes, of course, but fuck it,
We'll learn and play,
Come on, take a, take a shot, please,
- Okay, - Here's to those
who wish us well,,,
And all the rest can go to hell,
- Oh! - Six, okay, here we go,
Ooh, one, two, three, four, five, six,
Let's test your knowledge on psychology,
What chemical element is commonly used
to treat schizophrenia?
Goddamn, that's the first question?
No, there's no, no, Aw, snap,
Right, lithium,
Okay, and the answer,,,
Lithium,
- Hey, - What?
And, wait, and whoever had doubt in you
has to take a shot,
Wait, what?
I like this game!
49!
- Yeah, - 50!
Yeah, man, let's go,
I told you I can still do that,
Let's go,
Drink up, drink up, drink, bitches,
Now, drink, Yeah,
Okay, Epcot Centre,
- My mom, - Roadkill,
Are you guys even trying?
No,
Drink!
- What's the exact price tag? - No, no, no,
Like how much your friends cost?
How much do they cost?
I was not paying for friends,
I was in a sorority,
I, I, I paid dues,
Oh, okay, yeah, dues,
For your friends,
He makes a really good point,
Okay, asshats,
Neither of you were complaining
when I was getting you into our parties,
She makes a really good point,
- I do, - She does,
I do,
- Clifford? - Yeah,
When you were a DJ at the party-
- Here he goes, here he goes,
And you would invite us to come through?
Uh-huh,
Did we ever have a, did we ever pay you to get in?
Hey, look, I found a bird for you,
- No, - Did you need a pal?
Do you need a pet bird? Oh, did you find him a bird?
Did you, got a bird?
Take the bird, Aww,
You got her bird, take her bird,
Oh, speaking of, you guys stop by the parlour, man,
Yeah, I'll get your free drink or whatever you want,
What, you still work there?
Fuck, yeah, I still work there,
I'm the head of promotions, baby,
Speaking of head of promotions, here I am in the midst
of opening a night club,
- What? - I actually wanna talk
to big-time over here about that,
Me?
Yeah, like partnering up, man,
You know those, print out cash,
I don't think so, Mm,
Alright, I'm up, I'm up,
Four, Look at that, big winner!
One, two, three, four, Alright, let's go,
Riddle me this,
What can you hold in your right hand, but not in your left?
I fuckin' hate riddles,
Oopsies, you can't think outside of the box,
- Paulie, - Did you say oopsies?
- Oopsies, - Whatever, I don't know,
The Bible,
Ehh, your left hand,
Drink the rest of your beverage and move back five spaces
for giving up too easy, What?
- Bottoms up, - You didn't weep,
- Finish the beverage, - Oh my God, this game
can see the future,
One, two, three, four, five,
You're up, Troy,
You know, this boy's a legend on the block with this shit,
Alright, flip that!
And then I will pull the card
and we will get, uh, we will get very deep here, people,
What would you say is your biggest regret?
- Why getting serious? - This will be good,
Come on, guys,
We all know Troy doesn't have any regrets,
He's the epitome of living your best life,
What is that?
- That was Troy, - That was Troy!
- That is not Troy, - That is totally Troy,
Troy,
Um, I would say not finishing school to get my degree,
Wasting my dad's money,
Wow, okay,
Didn't know I'll feel bad about my impressions,
Good,
And uh, take a fresh shot and move back three spaces
and hold the player's hand to your left
till your next turn,
Whoa, whoa, what?
Why am I getting punished?
- I'll join you, - I'm trapped,
- I'm sorry, - For posterity,
This is great,
I can hold hands, come on,
Okay, okay, got it,
Alright, you, Sam?
Oh, okay, yep,
One, uno,
I'll go ahead and help you out there,
God you are,,,
I'm still losing,
Fuck, okay,
What are you so scared of that you hide in your work?
Ooh, Go to hell, Cliff,
That was, bro,
- What? - Don't what me,
You're always like, "This is a work-free zone, Sam,"
Oh, coincidentally, the game's talking about my work life?
What does it say?
- What the fuck? - That's really specific,
How do you, how do you even answer that?
Uh, easily,
I'm not scared of anything,
because I'm good at what I do and I love my job,
- Right, - That's, I mean, yeah,
It's a dumb question and it's a-
- Um, bad, - We're just gonna move on,
- Yeah, just go on, - Yeah,
Totally,
- What? - I'm fucked up,
What does it say?
- Uh- - What, Cliff?
- Uh,,, - Cliff?
Lying is forbidden,
So drink a full beer and remain conjoined
until someone rolls a six,
This is terrible, Conjoined?
- Conjoined? - Uh,,,
- I guess you're conjoined, - Okay, whatever,
I need a beer,
Troy! What are you doing?
- Let go of my hand, - Stop playing,
You, stop it,
Oh my God,
- Troy, I'm, - Here, here, since you don't
wanna leave me, Oh wow, wow,
You might as well just go ahead and take this home,
This is fucking weird, right?
I think these two are fucking with each other,
Just fuck, it's your turn, go, go, go, go,
- Hey, sit down, - Okay, okay, okay, I'm up,
I'm up, He's up, he's up,
Two and then here we go and, okay,
catharsis is good for the soul,
If you could tell anyone to go fuck themselves,
who would it be?
Oh, this game is getting spicy
and I like it,
I don't like it, I don't wanna,,,
No, come on, I would kill for that card,
I'd tell half of LA to go fuck themselves,
Same, like those shitbags that didn't buy my house,
Right, or that bitch of a ex-wife of yours,
- Oh, oh, - Hell yeah, fuck her,
She's trash, Thanks, Troy,
I almost forgot about that,
- I'm sorry, - No, you didn't,
- No, I didn't, - You really didn't,
You guys are, I love my friends,
Cliff, come on, what? Who is it?
Okay, okay, okay,
When I was in, when I was in, when I was in high school,,,
Aww,
- There was a girl, - Story time,
- Oh, - Claire,
I like her already,
She asked me to the Sadie Hawkins' dance,
My mom got us matching plaids,
- Wow, - And then the day of,
she fuckin' ditches me for Chad Hopson,
She ditched you for a Chad?
A fucking Chad!
- Oh! - She sucks,
- Yeah, I agree, - And because she sucks-
- Oh, here he goes, - I'm gonna have to,
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
get it, big boy, I'm gonna have to
say that it's Claire motherfucking Sullivan,
Here it goes,
Maybe it's the pizza,
Oh my God!
No, that's definitely not the pizza,
Where'd you get the flashlight?
The department store,
- Guys, come on, - Ow,
- Come on, - What are you doing?
Slow down, slow down,
- Is anybody there? - Somebody needs to check,
- Fuck you, - Cliff, it's your house, go,
- I can hear you, - Go, go, go, go,
Okay, okay, okay,
What is that? What?
You're such a pussy,
Stop it,
- What is that? - I don't know,
What am I doing here?
Where am I? Claire?
Oh God, please don't hurt my baby,
Please! Oh, oh, no, no, no, no,
No, no, no, no,
Claire, we, we were just playing a game,
Oh God, sorry,
That was the wrong thing to say,
Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God,
- Uh, I, - Uh, I, Cliff, Cliff,
Cliff, Cliff,
Say it, you have to, you have to-
- She's holding her baby, - Say it!
- You have to say it, - Okay, Claire,
Cliff Carson?
From Samo High, What am I doing here?
Say what? What do you have to say?
Claire, go fuck yourself,
- No, no, no, - Fuck that, fuck that,
fuck that, fuck that, fuck that,
Go, go, go, go!
- No, - Oh my God, oh my God,
Oh my God, Go!
Oh my God, Ow,
- What the fuck is going on? - Somebody call the police,
Then let go of my hand,
Why are we still doing this?
Stop it, stop it,
- Call the police, - Stop it,
- Hurry up, - I don't have no,
- Move, - I don't have any service,
Your fucking Wi-Fi sucks now,
- What? - Now my Instagram
won't even load, Lady!
Lady, help us!
Lady!
Windows don't work,
- What? - Windows don't work,
- It's not fucking, - What do you mean
the windows don't work? Uh, guys,,,
What are you doin'? What are you doin'?
Stop, Oh, man,
this isn't happening,
What does the card say?
"This is happening,"
Cliff, where'd you get the game?
I, the credenza,
I, Fuck the credenza,
Easy, Troy,
Where did you get, where did you get it?
Um, uh, my buddy Rey, he sells used furniture,
Okay, who had it before your buddy, Rey?
No, I didn't ask that, I mean,
What, did you check the CARFAX on the furniture?
- I was super high when I got- - Sweet, sweet,
And super helpful, Cliff,
By the way, thank you for a great evening,
This is a lot of fun,
- Hey, - Paul, I don't think he knew
he was buying a cursed credenza,
- Thank you, Sam, - This is my point, Sam,
He doesn't think,
- Oh, fuck you, dude, - Hey,
Fuck me? Are you fucking kidding me?
Look at what's happen- No, you guys, you guys!
There's new writing,
- What? - What?
The rules were there for all to see,
You chose to ignore them,
- No, no, that's not- - No, no, no,
That's not true, You read the rules!
I, I heard you,
But I didn't, Did I, Cliff?
Technically, no, she didn't,
You wanna tell everybody why?
I didn't let her finish all the rules, but-
- You never let people finish,
Dude, you never let people finish,
Oh my god, oh my God, out of my fucking way,
Get out of my- Who reads the rules
on a drinking game? Hold on, hold on, hold on,
hold on, hold on,
Yeah, okay, there's, uh,
there's a warning, uh
Yes, hello?
One of the players must win before sunrise
or all will be forced to play,,,
- To? - Forced to play what?
Or all will be forced to play for eternity,
That's what it literally says on the box?
Okay, Okay, producer,
Right? Okay, yeah,
You got a hit,
Alright, I auditioned for these elaborate-ass prank TV shows
at the beginning of my career,
I know what the fuck is going on,
We just watched a mom and a baby evaporate,
How can a show explain that?
- Holograms, - Holograms?
Mm-hmm, Holograms,
You're good at what you do,
What's the budget on this? What does that card say?
What does it say?
Holograms?
I'm sorry, you were right,
This is a game, I'm sorry,
Guys, this is like some fucked up episode
of "Black Mirror" or something,
No, it's more like "Outer Limits" by Hitchcock,
It's crazy that you would say that,
It's definitely like "Black Mirror",
It's not crazy, because "Black Mirror's"
about technology and this game
is made of cardboard, Yeah, this is impeding
our technology, so attracts, It's, the "Black Mirror"
is an homage to the face
of a mobile phone, It's an observation
of our current situation,
- It doesn't- - And so it does,
It's doesn't, Because we are in the midd,
I doesn't attract,
it doesn't attract, I'm telling you,
Can we not?
Oh, sorry, we've been drinking for hours,
This game tricked us,
Okay, so, what do we do now?
We keep playing,
It's your turn, Paul,
Do me a favour,
Roll a six,
Do us both a favour,
Okay, go ahead,
- Welcome back, Paul, - Oh, fuck you, guys,
- Shh, let him finish, - Let's play charades, Okay,
- Okay, - Okay,
Have your friends guess your favourite movie,
but without using any words,
So, we're playing charades, Charades,
No one wants to say anything about that?
Stay focused, stay focused,
stay focused, stay focused,
Okay, okay,
- Guy, let's play charades, - Yep, mm-hm, you got it,
Come on, Paulie, Alright, boom,
Uh, we love ch, we love charades,
We love, okay,
Okay, alright, Huh, favourite movie,
Um, uh, uh,,,
- What? - Oh, fuck,
You know lithium, but you don't know your favourite movie?
Kind of a lot has happened since then, Troy,
Okay, okay, okay,
It says from memory, so think of something iconic
like from your childhood,
Yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, okay, okay,
I have it, I have it,
Great,
Okay, Uh
Okay, keep going,
- "Lion King", "Lion King"! - "Invisible Man"?
- "2 Fast 2 Furious"? - Uh, a war?
- "Tokyo Drift"? - "Saving Private Ryan"!
Uh, what?
"Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon",
- "Fast and Furious", - "Jurassic Park"?
"Into the Woods"?
"Space Jam", "Jurassic Park",
- "Spider-Man", - "Popcorn",
- Uh,,, - "Babe",
"The Last of the Mohicans",
- Fuck, - Uh, uh,,,
"Charlotte's Web",
- Oh, oh, oh, - Oh, "Pocahontas",
- Oh, "Star Wars", - "Star Wars",
- Yes! - Yes!
- There we go,
- Thank you, thank you, - Boom,
Everything else was in question, but yeah, wow,
I was nervous there for a sec,
You, you were nervous,
- Yeah, right, - What the hell was that?
- Okay, - What was that?
Where?
- Oh my God! Oh my God! - Oh, it hurts, oh, it hurts,
Oh, oh, oh, Stop jumping, Cliff!
You're making it worse, Where's the first aid kit?
- I don't live here! - Where's the first aid kit?
It's in the bathroom!
Go, get it, Go get it,
Go already, go,
- Ow! - Troy!
Go, you, the wrong way,
- Oh, shit, - Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry,
Sorry, are you okay?
Do you need anything?
What can I get you?
Ah, fuck, Tequila,
No, that's not a good idea,
- Tequila! - Okay,
Oh my God,
Okay, I got, I got first aid right here,
Dude, this looks ancient,
Why do you think the game shot me?
Uh, you know, I actually
think this was meant for Paul,
Me, why?
Because you leaned forward and it missed you,
You did something wrong,
Uh, that's ridiculous,
I didn't do any wrong,
- Did you use words? - No,
No, actually he did exactly
what the game wanted him to do,
Uh, use charades to describe your favourite movie, right?
R-right,
- Wh- - Paul?
- Right? - What?
What's that?
Oh, okay, okay,
It's a, it's a, it's "Apocalypto",
What?
- My, my favourite movie is- - Apoca what?
- Is "Apocalypto", - Then why the fuck
did you act out "Star Wars"?
Do you know any scenes from "Apocalypto", Sam?
It's not my favourite movie, Paul,
- Yeah, maybe, - Okay, fuck you,
You're the one that said think of something iconic, Sam,
Okay? So, you're,
now you're blaming me?
- Okay, alright, wait, - Guys!
- Okay, okay, okay, - Sorry, sorry, sorry,
Uh, I'm gonna need your help, okay?
- Okay, - Are you gonna pull it out?
No, no,
Because if I do that, um, you'll bleed out and die,
So um, what we're gonna do,
what we're gonna do is, we're just gonna break it
and then wrap you up quick,
Right? And is that not gonna hurt?
- Absolutely, Absolutely, - Yes,
Oh man,
Okay, shh, shh, just easy, easy, easy,
You gonna rip this? Wait, oh wait,
Don't do that thing where you say
you're gonna pull it on three
and then do it on one, okay?
Okay,
What would you like us to do?
I want you to say on three, Okay?
One, two, three, snap,
- Got you, - Okay?
- Okay, okay, - We got you,
Okay, so, we're just gonna count to three,
Yeah, okay?
Ready?
You're making,,,
Did you see that fucking hole?
Get your shit together,
Go get the second card, so we can finish the fucking game,
- Okay, - Go!
The one thing I said, wait until three,
I said wait until three,
Rules are in place for a reason and punishments
are how we evolve,
You cheated, Paul,
Card-
- You cheated, Paul,
once with your duplicity, and again by evading
your comeuppance,
Now one of your own must decide how to discipline you,
Beware if they fall short, all will be punished,
What does that mean?
It means, one of us has to punish Paul
or else we all get the same,
- We'll all get arrows? - Dude,
Can, don't just blurt that shit out?
Yeah, you wanna think up the Stay Puft Marshmellow Man,
while you're at it?
Okay, take it easy,
You're the reason he was shot in the first place,
I didn't shoot him with an arrow, Sam,
The game did,
And, and, and if it's so magical,
how did it miss me?
Maybe, it's messing with our heads?
Did you ever think of that?
Just like in "Saw",
Oh my God, man,
Okay, well, we just have to think
of a way to punish Paul, but not like decapitate him,
- Oh, oh, okay, cool, - What?
So, just like slightly maim me,
Okay, Paul,
This game isn't fucking around,
so we need to come up with a punishment
or we are all getting worse, okay?
Fuck that, no, I'm sorry,
No, Okay?
I did not even wanna play this game, you three insisted,
You made me play it, basically, okay?
And I'm sorry, but none of you
are capable of dishing out a balanced judgement, alright?
Troy, you only think of things
that are quick and easy for you,
Cliff's brain is a, is a bag of cats,
- Hey, - And Sam, you and him,
you dated for what, a fucking year, and then,
and then when you broke up,
you went completely fucking insane,
Hey, you know what?
Fuck you! Go to hell, Paul!
- Oh, no, no, no, Sam, - Where'd he go?
- Sam? - Where'd he go?
- Paul? - Hell?
Come back,
Come back from hell, Paul,
Whoa,
Are you, buddy, are you okay?
Paul, I'm sorry,
I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it,
I was just, I was just really fucking angry at you,
I'm sorry, You want some Tequila?
Okay, this game has been pinning us against each other,
It's 3:00 a,m, and we- What?
How is that possible? Look, we,,,
We have to work fast and we have to work together
or else we're never gonna get out of here,
- Yeah, - Okay,
So, uh, how was hell?
Ow,
A real leader can command under any circumstance,
Before the music stops, lead the others
in your own personalised Jazzercize choreography,
What?
Oh, oh, oh, that's not so bad,
Oh, so you, you know a tonne of Jazzercize routines, Troy?
Oh,
What?
- Oh, - Oh, oh,
Uh, what?
Uh, Sam,
Live from Venice, California,
Here to defend their lives,
we have Troy, Paul, Cliff, and their leader, Samantha,
Sam, What do we do?
Uh,,,
Just, just follow me,
Uh, uh, uh, lean,
- Lean? - Other way, Lean,
- Okay, - Circles,
- Cir, okay, - Do it again,
- Okay, - Um, in and out,
Okay, like jumping jack?
- Yeah, Come on, Troy, - Ow!
Troy!
Wah, what, what, why, why, why?
What did we do?
You guys gotta join hands,
Join hands, yes, Hold hands?
Oh, give it to me,
Okay, okay, okay,
Five, six, seven, eight, Here we go,
Lean, lean,
Lean,
Uh, circle,
Another one,
In and out,
Alright, shoulder,
Behind, go behind,
Behind,
Alright, behind, behind,
behind, behind,
Sorry, for- It's okay, it's okay,
- Okay, - We got this!
- Whoo! - Five, six, seven, eight,
And kick,
And out,
Here we go, circles,
Circle,
Yes, yes,
Yes, here we go,
Uh, knee,
Knee,
Shoulder,
Go behind me,
Hey,
Out, out,
Sky,
Hips,
- Finish strong, - Do it,
We finished,
Oh, oh my God,
Did we do it?
We, what does it say?
Good work, Samantha,
You may move forward an extra three spaces
for enthusiasm and quality leadership,
Okay, quality leadership, I'll take it,
Alright, I'm next,
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, - Okay, yeah,
But before you go, let's take care of the bandages,
- Yeah, that, that really- - That looks awful,
No, fuck that, we're on a roll,
Okay, it's going,
Boom,
Oh my God, Finally, finally,
Oh my God, Get off of me now, Get off my face,
- Oh, gosh, - Oh, man,
I will never doubt you again, Cliff,
That's right,
Now read that next card, bitch,
Okay, let's just take that one down a notch,
and I regretted it,
Literally the second- No, you actually believe
that lions, tigers, and elephants are native to the US?
And I eventually figured it out,
- Oh, you eventually did it? - Oh, I'm happy, I'm happy,
Did you finally get access to the internet?
Look, I grew up in LA,
I don't know what to tell you, okay?
All I knew was there was a zoo,
- Answer, - I grew up in LA,
- Yeah, - I'm from LA, too, okay,
Oh, Jesus, God bless you, Cliff,
But, God bless Sam's mom for her crack cookies,
- Mm, - Thank you,
- Oh, yes, - Sam, seriously,
they're so good,
Can she just be my mom?
I mean, she practically is,
She asks about you ass-hats,
more than she asks about me,
- Aww, - Aww,
Did she ask about me?
You love moms,
Can I actually grab one more, please?
- What's up with those two? - They broke up,
Yesterday,
I just, I just hope things don't get weird,
- Samantha, hey, - Hi!
- How you doin'? - Hi,
Who's that?
- Alright! - Okay,
Nice!
Dude, you get this one right
and you're just one turn away
from ending this fiasco,
Hey, no pressure, please,
Uh, what time is it?
- It's close to 5:00 a,m, - Almost 5:00,
We gotta, card, card, card, Paul, card,
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,
Um,,, Okay,
- Go ahead, - It says,
"Why did you lie, Troy?"
What, how?
What does that mean? What does that mean?
I don't know, I don't know,
- Troy, - I don't know,
Troy, what does that mean?
Maybe, it's referencing the question earlier
about your regret, your biggest regret,
Troy?
I, I didn't lie,
I, I- What?
Oh, no,
What does the next card say?
You were warned, Troy,
Until you learn to be honest with yourself,
a fresh perspective will do you some good,
Fresh perspective?
Sam?
Why'd you just call me Sam?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no,
No, no, no, no, no, no,
No, no, no,
No, no, no, you fucking asshole,
I miss one fucking question,
Uh, wait, is this, wait, wait,
This secret's about us, isn't it?
Oh, you can't even admit what you did
even when our fucking lives depend on it,
- What I did? - Can we just take a second?
Oh, I knew, I knew in my soul
you were fucking someone else
which is why you broke up with me,
You couldn't even look at me anymore,
Oh, hell no,
- Who's that? - I don't know,
- Mm, good to see you, - It's so good you're here,
Troy, I'll be back, Troy,
No, no, no, no,
Was I not allowed to move on?
I wasn't fucking anyone else, Sam,
You and I got in one fight and you said
it was getting too complicated and wanted to end it,
To which you said, "Cool,"
Troy, you said, "Cool,"
Why else would you say that?
What else was I supposed to say?
I don't know, you could have fought for me,
Oh, but I wasn't perfect enough for perfect Troy,
Right, and we were friends,
Why was I the only one that was supposed to be hurting?
So, you bring a dude to a party to hurt me on purpose?
- Yes, - Wow,
That's some cold shit,
And you wonder why you're alone?
At least I'm not a fucking failure,
I am a working producer,
You don't think I know about you
going around town begging for these little jobs?
Oh, and this little night club situation,
that's bullshit and I know that for a fact,
You lying, pathetic, fucking cliche,
You know, I just realised something,
You never cancel work or anything for anyone,
They cancelled on you tonight, didn't they?
Yeah, you're not here for Paul,
You're here for you,
What were you doing in the bathroom, Sam?
Having some of your happy pills?
Fuck you, Troy,
Okay, uh, you know what, guys,
Why don't I just roll us a joint?
- Fuck you, Sam, - No, fuck you,
Sam!
- Sam, oh my God, - I didn't, I didn't mean-
- Jesus Christ, get the fuck out of the way,
Dude, are you okay?
Oh, oh, shit,
That does not look good, You alright?
Cliff, I am so sorry,
No, don't be,
Honestly, I can't even feel anything anymore,
- Don't do that, - Don't, don't, don't-
- What is wrong with you, Sam? - You're big,
I barely even touched him,
- Come on, - You didn't even
Guys, guys, guys,
Knock the shit off, okay?
Come on, we have less than an hour to finish this game,
Alright, no more holding back,
No more fucking lying, alright?
Cliff, are you cool to go on?
- I'm good, - Sam?
- Yes, - Troy,
Right, alright, let's go,
Alright, here we go,
Man, you are an assassin with that thing!
Hmm, okay,
The path to freedom is treacherous,
If Troy doesn't have the strength to make
the difficult decisions, maybe you do,
Tell him what you saw at that party, Cliff,
You okay, Cliff?
- Cliff, - I'm sorry,
I'm so sorry,
- Mm, good to see you, - It's so good you're here,
- Troy, - I got it,
Uh, Troy, Poor guy,
- Can I get you a drink? - Mm-hmm,
Okay, okay,
Sorry, Thank you,
Troy, Troy, Troy, come on, come on,
Come on, man,
Come on, What the fuck is that?
- It's,,, - Huh?
Hmm? What, it's Sam,
Come on, let's go back outside,
We'll play some beer pong,
You fucking stop drinking,
Come on, let's go outside,
Come on,
- I'ma get my phone, - Okay,
♪ Fell away with nothing to show ♪
♪ And the walls kept tumbling down ♪
♪ In the city that we love ♪
Oh my God,
That was a really shitty thing to do, huh?
Oh, she can do what, whatever she wants,
Yeah, 'cause she doesn't deserve you,
'Cause you're amazing and you're gonna be famous,
Thank you, but I don't know about all that,
You're on TV all the time,
So, it's only a matter of time,
We'll see,
Not with that attitude you won't,
Okay, I gotta tell you something,
If you really want something, like really, really want it,
you just have to take it,
Hey, Troy, I was thinking we could,,,
Fuck, Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,
Stay, you stay here,
♪ Tumbling down in the city that we love ♪
♪ Grey clouds roll over the hills ♪
♪ Bringing darkness from above ♪
- Troy, Troy! - What's up?
- How you doin', man? - Good, good,
Have you, uh, have you seen Al?
Nope,
- You okay? - I'm fine, yeah,
♪ But if you close your eyes ♪
Yo, your name's Troy, right?
You were in that, that, that show "JV Squad", right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
You got me, man, Oh my God!
Freedom!
Yes, it is!
Paul?
- I think before- - I'm Sam, I'm Sam, I'm Sam,
I'm Sam, Fuck!
Fuck! Fuck!
Fuck,
Paul, look, let's just talk about it-
- You had eight fucking years to talk about it, man,
- Dude, we were all drunk, - Drunk?
Are you serious? That's your excuse?
You were in my wedding,
All of you,
Yeah,
What were we supposed to say, man?
You were in love with her,
I- Just stop!
I didn't ask for any of this,
Not to get divorced, not to come to this shit hole,
Not to play this fucked up game,
I don't deserve it,
And if one of you fuckers would have been honest
with me, would have been a friend,
none of this would be happening right now,
- He's always the victim, - Excuse me?
Yeah, I fucked up,
And I hate myself for it and I should have told you,
but you knew exactly the kind of person she was,
We all did,
I mean, that's the reason
you cut us out of your life, right?
Not cause of her,
But because you knew it was only a matter of time
before something like this happened,
And you married her anyway,
That's on you,
If you two are done cheering him up,
I'm gonna go talk to him,
No, no,
I'm gonna go talk to him, okay?
You look like him and you sound like him,
Can you help me up?
Thank you,
Fuck,
Hey, Uh, it's neither of the Troys,
Okay,
Yeah, that was a good joke, bad time,
Um,
I don't know,
I don't know, Troy fucked up,
I did too,
Um, I don't,,,
Do difficult, I don't do,,,
But, um, I thought you were gonna hate me if I told,,,
Then I saw you guys the next week
and you just looked so happy, and I was like,
"Who am I to take away that happiness?"
You know, it's not,,,
I know I was wrong, okay?
I screwed up again,
But right now, Paul,
we need you,
We really need you,
I'm sorry,
No, it's,,,
We both messed up,
I mean you messed up way worse,
Is that why, you know, you don't wanna,,,
Alice?
Nah,
Then why, never mind,
It's okay,
Okay,
He's not coming,
Is there anybody, oh, baby!
Oh my God, There you are,
You have no idea we got Cliff so bad,
- I'm leaving, - Is everything okay?
Oh my God, I hate it when you ask me that,
It makes me feel like something is wrong with me,
Just stay and drink again,
And I, I, I, I called a cab, so,,,
Hey, where is this coming from?
Like I,,,
Are you, are you sure everything's okay?
Nothing is wrong,
I just wanna leave,
Do you want me to come with you?
Okay, we'll go,
I'll, I'll just tell Sam and the guys that-
- Do whatever you want, I'm leaving,
Hold on a second,
What is, what is hap, why, how, what is,,,
What happened? What did I do?
Whoa, whe, where is she going?
Uh, she's not feeling well,
So I'm, I'm actually gonna go with her,
make sure she gets home safe,
Um, alright,
Well, have a good night, You too,
Al, Al, hold on, No, Hold on,
No, no, I'm, I'm tired of this,
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait, okay?
I, I didn't even wanna come here today,
I, I, they begged me,
I'm just trying to make the best of it,
I mean, those parties are getting exhausting, right?
Look at this, Really?
Really,
Okay, well, my friend Chloe's hosting a party in WeHo,
Let's go,
- Let's go, - Let's go,
Come on, come on, I got it,
You got it?
Paul, he's, he's done?
He's done,
So Sam,,, Sam,
- You? - Mm-hmm,
It's your turn, Let's do it,
I wanna answer your question,
You really don't have to,
You're a force, Sam,
I mean, it's, it's the reason why you're so successful,
But it's also why I never felt like I was enough for you,
So yeah, I just let it end, 'cause,,,
'Cause that was easier than dealing with my own failures,
And I've been missing my best friend ever since,
That was beautiful,
A little heavy on the cheese,
- Oh, oh, - Oh,
- Oh, Jesus Christ, - Oh, my dick,
Oh, Wait, what happened?
Not that I'm complaining, I'm pretty sure you finally
were honest with yourselves,
So that's a first,
I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding,
Also, the sun is coming up
and I am getting woozy, so,
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, - We gotta go, we gotta go,
we gotta go, Yeah, yeah,
I missed you too, buddy,
- And roll the dice, - Okay, okay, okay,
Oh, okay, alright, Oh yes!
Oh, there we go, there we go,
Just bring it home,
Okay, let's see now over here,
Finish the end of the sentence before the timer runs out,
Sentence, what, what sentence?
They called again, Sam, Where are you?
I'm coming, I'm coming,
Sorry, I had to park five blocks away,
Valet is a fortune,
Thank God, okay, I, I was running out of excuses,
Go get him, Sam,
Thanks,
Ugh, hey, mom, Hi, hon,
Just checking in on my girl, Oh, shit, it's your mom,
Uh, mom, listen, now is not a good time, okay?
Oh, I didn't mean to be a bother,
I just haven't heard your voice
in a few weeks and wanted to-
- Yeah, uh, mom, I've got people waiting for me, okay?
Can I call you back?
Ooh, who are you meeting?
Some fancy Hollywood producer types?
Okay, mom?
Mary came into my shop again, asking about-
- Mom!
So, Sam, do you, do you, uh,
do you remember what you said?
I can't,
But, I understand that it's tough,
but you, you have to say it,
Oh, no,
Mom, I'm fucking busy, okay?
If I wanna talk to you, I will call you, okay?
Bye,
Sam?
When was that?
That's the last thing I said to my mom,
Sam,
She had a, a stroke a couple of days later,
She was gone, I,
I didn't, I didn't, I didn't tell anybody,
because I was so ashamed, I was so embarrassed,
I, I just, I, I, I, I buried myself
in my work and I don-,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
I didn't tell you, I'm sorry,
I just, I, I, I, uh, I,,,
She loved you guys,
I just, I never got to say I'm sorry,
And that I, and that I loved her,
She knew you were working hard,
She was very proud of you,
Understand?
She, she knew you didn't mean none of those words,
She knew you loved her,
And she still does, understand?
Okay? Mm,
Come here, come here,
Okay? Yeah,
Okay,
Hey, remember when I threw you into a credenza?
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry,
Yeah, 'cause you were in his body,
It's okay,
Yeah, she took advantage of me,
Might've, might've, she might've taken advantage of you,
Remember when you sent Paul to hell?
We gotta finish this fucking game,
- Yeah, - Yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah, Okay,
- Paul, - We're fine,
- Yeah? - Yeah,
Come on, man, we got, we got bigger fish to-
- Yeah,
Okay, do me a favour, Roll a six,
Do us all a favour, please,
No pressure, right?
See,
You have any pointers?
Uh, yeah, try not damning us to hell,
- Mm, mm-hmm, - Well, mm-hmm,
Alright, yeah,
Right, right, right, Just no pressure there at all,
Jesus Christ,
Definitely, not him,
I'm not reading that,
Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope,
Yeah, okay, okay,
It is long,
And it's a riddle,
Oh God, Of course,
No, no, no, nah, uh-huh,
No, no, no, no, no,
No, no, come on, come on, We got this,
Give morale, give morale,
we're here, we're here, We're here, we got this,
we got this, okay?
Okay, I took your chance to suc
What is this?
What did you do to me?
Okay, relax,
Let us explain a little bit,
So- You stay back!
I am calling the police, Don't do that,
Where's my phone?
Help!
Help, somebody help! Hey, Alice!
Shut the fuck up!
We don't have time for your shit,
You're here, we're here,
And if you don't get your shit together,
we're all going to die,
So find a fucking seat
and let us finish this godforsaken game,
Cliff, the riddle,
I took your chance to succeed,
lied about my every misdeed,
attempts to cover done in vain,
introduced your truest pain,
And I who brought your doom
now stand in this very room,
If correct, we claim only the one,
Misdirect, and all will become none,
So who is it, Paul? Who am I?
Okay, what's going on?
Paul?
Who did that? It's the game,
They brought her here for a reason,
so you know what to do,
Someone tell me what's going on,
They want me to send you to hell,
Okay, okay,
I'm hallucinating,
That's it, because I was at an after party with Andre,
And then one of you must have drugged me,
Okay, you know what, the sun's almost up so-
- Okay, guys, guys, I, I, I really think
we should talk about this,
Yeah, maybe there's someone we're not thinking about,
Oh, oh! Oh!
Baby, I'm scared,
Paul, I know it was hard, but come on,
Wait, what if it's not Alice?
- Oh, it's Alice, - No, no, no,
What if it's one of us?
- What? What did we do? - But how?
Okay, you kept his secret about a misdeed,
Oh, so I'm supposed to go to hell now?
No, I'm saying it could also be me,
I introduced the two of them, right?
But if Paul gets this wrong,,,
Guys, guys, guys, Oh, no, no, no,
Paul!
Oh, go, go, go, go, go, go,
No, no, no, no, no,
- Paul, Paul, please, - Take her damn name,
you know I'm right,
Did you know that Troy was texting me for months
begging me to leave you, I had to block his number,
What?
And Cliff was always trying to get me drunk,
That's why I was wasted all the time,
No, no,
Look at them,
You said yourself that they were holding you back,
See what they've done to you,
Sure, we didn't work out, but you cannot deny
that there was real love between us,
- That's a lie too - Paul, I have only
ever wanted what was best for you,
I would have never let this happen to you,
I've only ever wanted what was best for you!
Do not be stupid, Paul,
Don't let these bitches manipulate you,
No, you do not,
can't say that! No, watch your mouth!
- She's lying, don't let- - Say her name,
Say her name, Paul, now!
Paul! You're manipulative,
It's me,
Am I dead?
Do you feel dead?
I think you'd know if you were dead,
You're not Alice, are you?
So, I was right then,
What?
You were correct,
But I wonder what's more important
that you now know the answer or that you were right?
It's the same thing,
Is it?
Time to go,
Congratulations, Paul,
Hey!
My friends and I didn't deserve this,
You know, we're, we're good people,
No, you're not,
But you're not bad either, Just people,
What?
- He's waking up, - Hey,
Hey, handsome, You alright?
- Welcome back, buddy, - What's up, man?
- How you feelin'? - Like Dorothy,
It's a "Wizard of Oz" joke,
He's good, Okay,
- Easy, easy, - Slowly but surely,
here he is, There he is,
It's weird, right?
Everything went back to normal except for you passing out,
Yeah, and Alice vanishing like Claire,
- Mmm, - That wasn't Alice,
- What was that? - I don't,,,
How long was I out? A minute, max,
Oh, c,,,
Can we have a minute for how melodramatic you were?
"It's me,"
- It's me, - Who are you, Ne-yo?
Are you fucking,
I thought I was going back to fucking hell,
I have service,
Can we actually leave?
No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Oh fuck,
- What? - What?
- What? What? - The pizza,
- Oh, stupid, - Oh my God,
Come on, man, Come on,
Wait, can someone take me to the hospital?
Holy shit,
This is where he lives?
You're gonna be okay, buddy?
Yeah,
Okay, good luck,
- Be right back, - Alright,
Fix your pants, Okay,
See a little bit of underwear,
Listen, I'm gonna set up drinks with you
and a producer friend of mine,
Yeah?
Yeah, I mean, no guarantees,
but he's making some cool shit,
so I feel like you guys should meet,
Yeah, okay,
Yeah, thank you,
Yeah,
And I won't let you down,
Oh, no, I know you won't,
What about you?
I think I need a vacation,
- I think you do, too, - You,,,
I think I'm gonna take a vacation,
I think I'm gonna let Caroline run things for a while,
I'm here for you,
- Paulie! - Hello, Andre,
- Oh, you look sleepy, - Thanks,
Is Alice here?
Could I talk to her please?
Have you come to rescue her?
Alice, Alice,
What?
You don't know?
You talk about comedic timing,
- Alice! Alice, hold on, - What? What?
You wanna gloat?
God, you were right, okay?
He's a piece of shit,
Happy? I didn't know,
Alice, you asked me to come here
to sign the divorce papers, remember?
- Oh, - What happened?
Andre said that we were losing our fire
and so he suggested that we keep things open,
He's almost 50, so I thought he was over
the Hollywood Bacchanalia bullshit,
Will you be okay?
Paul, I'm so sorry about
how I am,
You know, I'm just,
and you're,,,
You're good,
Just, I think I have some issues to work out,
Maybe just a few,
You gonna be okay?
- Me? - Yeah,
Suntan looks really good on you,
Oh, Paul! The, the papers,
Yeah,
Wherever I end up going, I can assure,,,
Guys, guys, guys, guy! Don't be like that,
- Shh, shh, shh, - What?
Oh shit, Look at his face,
- Hey, buddy, how'd it go? - Hey,
- They broke up, - They bro-
- What? - Well, that's Karma,
Wait, wait, hold on,
You're not getting back together though, are you?
- Oh God, no, - Oof,
- I'm not insane, - Okay,
Well, you know, just wanna make sure,
What happened? Did you cuss her out?
No,
I gotta stop being so righteous, dude,
What in the devil is that?
- Oh, oh, - Hey, Paulie,
Uh, look, I just want to say,
uh, I always thought you were like totally chill guy
but you know, how you stayed with her
for so long, I have no idea,
You are like Job from the Bible,
You know, from the Bible, Job,
Anyway, to make the long story more short,
uh, Alice is gone,
So you and friends, hello, friends, hello,
You and friends can come inside, enjoy, huh?
We're gonna party all day,
We're gonna party all night,
Huh?
There's tonnes of pussy inside,
You and me, we could be like double eskimo brothers,
Yeah? I think we're good,
Suit yourself, Au revoir!
- Au revoir! - Au revoir, voir!
See ya!
What?
Why aren't we going inside?
That's the guy?
He's like a walking sexual harassment lawsuit,
Yeah,
Man, his loafers are cool,
But the harassment thing is important,
Paul, are you okay?
Paulie,
You come to get more crazy?
We're not having this conversation anymore,
What, oh, alright, There,
Are you done, Mr, Righteous man?
Uh, I'm done being righteous now,
Let's get out of here,
Hey, you guys, We gonna play a game,
Hey, it's,,, Here, hey, guys,
check it out,
- Nice! - Wait, that was today?
- Yeah! - You took that,
I thought I was dead,
You thought I was dead, Yeah, I know,
Yeah, it was hilarious,