- Ever since I got into electronic music,
when I was young,
I was absolutely fascinated by its origin,
- I create the music as a frame
for the transmission of voice,
where they can experience it directly in their bodies,
- Gender should have nothing to do with music,
and the fact that I'm a woman should be irrelevant,
- Female sexual energy is so fucking insanely powerful,
that it's scary for a lot of people,
We have no end to it,
it's like a bottomless abyss of creative energy,
- Standing on the stage,
I saw everybody really enjoying themselves,
and I got this wave of empathic,
it was almost like
an energetic orgasm,
- We're trying emerge in places
where we're not necessarily always wanted,
- As women, we're all in that dream
of opening up to our to our full voice,
and our full power,
- What would happen if we weren't told that we were broken?
We stopped believing that it was true,
- What does the true feminine look like
if given the chance to express itself?
(ambient electronic music)
- Yeah yeah, I know I'm late,
but I'm leaving yesterday, I swear,
I got my gig set, I'm totally good to go,
Uh, who are you?
- Oh, sorry, I'm Roxy,
I'm doing a story for my school newspaper
about cool jobs,
Can I interview you?
- If you can keep up with me,
- Okay, thanks,
Um, you're a DJ right?
- More like an electronic artist,
That phrase, disk jockey, is kinda old school,
Back in the day, you'd literally jockey disks,
you know, 45's stacked high like pancakes?
Two turntables, sample, scratch, mix,
Now, more women are entering the scene,
Things are changing,
so why don't you ask me what I really do?
- Oh, okay,
what do you really do?
- I'm a frequency hunter,
a vibe shifter,
I read the mood of the crowd,
and I reflect it back at 'em,
I take you to the next level,
lift you someplace better,
I get to score the soundtrack of those moments in your life,
- Wow, super WALA,
- Damn right, welcome to the rabbit hole, kid,
Welcome to my house,
I just moved in like two months ago,
so things are still kind of everywhere,
And I was self-conscious about it,
but I keep being reminded,
this is real life stuff, this is how an artist really lives,
And this is my studio,
I also call it the WALA womb,
because it's just like tiny, and red, and cozy,
and at night it glows really nicely,
and this is where I do all my best work,
It was amazing to be written up
as one of the top five female DJ's,
but it brought with it this whole shit-storm of social media,
of like, both sides of the debate,
some women saying, this is amazing,
I'm so glad you're getting this attention,
Women need to be highlighted
because there are so few of us,
and then other people saying,
it shouldn't have anything to do with gender,
But I really didn't want it to be
about the fact that I was a girl,
(soft electronic music)
The greatest compliment I received
is from a guy who said in front of a show,
he was yelling at his roommate saying,
oh we're gonna miss WALA's set,
and I said don't worry,
you're not gonna miss WALA's set,
He started yelling at me and saying,
how do you know?
How do you know?
He's my favorite DJ, and I've never seen him before,
and if I don't make this show, I'm gonna be so upset,
and I said, because I'm WALA, and the guy's jaw dropped,
So that was my favorite thing,
when people didn't even realize that I was a woman,
Of course, I want to support women,
but I don't want to be known
as like the DJ who's paving the way for other female DJ's,
That is not my cause, that is not my crusade,
I want to make good music,
that's my crusade,
(electronic beats)
- I was standing on the stage,
and I saw everybody really enjoying themselves,
and I got this wave of empathic,,,
It was almost like an energetic orgasm,
As soon as I get up there,
there's nowhere in the world I'm more comfortable and happy,
than when I'm up there,
I can dance, I can just feel like my feral self,
I took on the name AppleCat at random,
I make up lots of things, and what it means,
it's the biblical thing of the apple,
and woman is both the apple and the snake,
But really it was just random and it worked,
It'll take me like five seconds a song,
So I'll look at the line, and I'll be like,
oh, okay this is where the drop is,
this is where the build is,
I'm really harsh sometimes with songs,
I'll see the word 'funk',
and I'll be like, oh get the fuck out of here,
Anything even slightly disco-related,
I just want to die, just die,
I like to leave maybe like five to 10 tracks at the end,
that I can just throw in at any point,
If the crowd doesn't like where I'm going with something,
then I will change it,
It's all about the empathic connection with them,
Women get a lot of first chances,
but they won't get nearly as many second chances,
- A lot of the time I will show up at gigs,
and realize that the promoter
didn't actually listen to what I played,
Did you just hire me because you wanted
some sort of gender diversity on your poster?
You know that just gives me the challenge
of being like okay fine,
You hired me because I'm a girl, fine whatever,
I'm gonna show you what a fucking girl DJ can do,
(electronic beats)
- Sometimes I'll get people
writing on my fan page and stuff,
and they're like, you're doing feminism wrong,
For me, I've like gone like
full spectrum, like I tried to be really like
tough, like one of the guys,
I'll put the pantsuit on, fuck yeah,
like I got it,
And it's like, at the same time,
all the best things of being a woman
are how beautiful we are,
and how fucking emotional, and sensual we are, and like,
we hear things and see things that like other people don't,
And like, that's not something
that you need to fucking put a pantsuit over,
that's something to be embraced,
I grew up playing music with my dad,
and we had like a family bluegrass band,
So I'd play like accordion, and harmonica, and fiddle,
I think my like ultimate way of like rejecting
being a teenager,
like my parents don't know anything cool,
I'm gonna go be a DJ,
and so then I went to sound and audio engineering school,
I was like one of the only girls in the program,
and so, I was always trying to prove myself,
and I would like keep in my purse like
every connector, and like a soldering gun,
Because I'm like, I'm ready to fix it,
Like, I can do it,
And so, at one point, I was like,
the moment you've all been waiting for,
the patch bay broke,
And I came in, and I like soldered it back together,
And the rapper that we were recording was like,
Blondtron is fixing the patch bay,
And so then I was Blondtron, it never stopped,
- It's simple economics,
The party bot is sexy,
People want sexy,
- Hello, anyone in there?
I'm trying to figure out a way
to get the heck out of here,
(electronic music)
- Just been putting on some vocals on this track,
and trying to make this track playable
for the next gig,
(lyrics muffled)
♪ We're the legend to come ♪
♪ We're not the only one ♪
♪ Do you believe that ♪
♪ We are blessed by the sun ♪
- I create the music as a frame
for the transmission of voice,
♪ Do you know how to make a map of the stars ♪
♪ To find right where we are ♪
♪ How are you the ♪
♪ Pretty thing that you are ♪
♪ With each and every star ♪
- And actually imbue the vibration
that's coming through my physical body,
into the beings of other people,
where they can experience it directly in their bodies,
and that's the power of that amplification
that comes through the technology
and being on these like massive sound systems,
(lyrics muffled)
It's not just the music, it's also the silence, too,
One of my favorite things to do
is to just turn off the sound system,
and have everyone close their eyes,
and get quiet,
and then take a moment to feel gratitude,
I really feel optimistic about more empowered women
stepping up as leaders, and modeling,
the ushering in of a more feminine consciousness,
It's gonna change the nature of the conversation,
and change the nature of the game,
- I think growing up,
it was certainly confusing to be a girl,
because I liked boy things,
I always played video games and honestly like,
video game music is a big reason
I'm even into electronic music,
and I think a lot of producers will say that,
I used to be a LAN gamer, I used to like
hang out with the dudes and play games all night,
for hours and hours,
but I wasn't allowed to stay over because I was a girl,
It did definitely confuse my identity in terms of my gender,
at a very young age,
And so I just always would say to people,
and I still do,
I'm like I think I'd be way more comfortable being a man,
- We got company,
XP Giving, Loot Dropping Company,
- Crap, not again,
- Um, I guess we can fight,
- We don't have time to fight, we have to run,
just like two more steps,
- I think part of being a woman in the American culture,
at least at my age, I feel a little bit brainwashed
into this like competitive mindset,
and like I'm not good enough, and I'm not pretty enough,
and I'm not wearing the right thing,
or like this girl's gonna get my guy, or whatever it is,
and that mentality is so poisonous,
that it really puts a rift between women,
- Growing up, I didn't have many female friends,
I was a nerd, I was a freak, I was a geek,
I was everything that everybody didn't like at school,
I remember getting my first webcam,
and it was my Mom's,
I was 13,
Okay, here I am trying to test out my new web camera,
My pictures started getting a lot of attention
that I wasn't used to,
Hello, look at me,
I've got new hair,
bright pink, or flamingo pink,
This around the time too,
when I was really exploring my own sexuality,
and how it was definitely outside of the norm,
And I didn't have anybody to talk to about that,
(cat meowing)
This is the Animal Protection Society cat sanctuary,
They don't seem like they're feral, they seem very nice,
but as soon as you take them out of this situation,
or even if you put them in a different area,
they just go crazy,
- Mya and I were
best friends, almost always together,
and that probably had a lot to do
with being a single parent,
her father being in Calgary, she didn't see him as much,
We moved out west,
when Mya was four, I had a boyfriend,
and we just packed everything we could into our car,
drove through the mountains and the snow,
And then all of a sudden there was green grass,
and it was excellent,
We moved a lot,
but we were always home when we were together,
- Get out, I can't do this anymore!
- Well you're a broken record,
- Don't touch me!
(car starting) (woman crying)
- Not again, I can't let her do it again,
Out of all the people that hurt her,
she insists on hurting herself the most,
I will be strong, for those who can't,
A warrior,
- When Mya left home, I was working at a job I hated,
and I needed to pay the rent, and I needed to feed her,
Something just exploded within me,
and we had a major fight,
and I kicked her out,
She needed to move out, and I needed to live my own life,
but she was homeless,
(electronic music)
- I was 15,
I didn't know where to go, I slept here sometimes,
hung out here,
It was kind of a refuge for me, back then,
When you're homeless, the worst time, especially as a girl,
to sleep, is to sleep at night,
It just makes you way more vulnerable,
So I learned,
in the daytime you find your little catnaps here and there,
In the nighttime you just kind of wander around,
Do you best to stay out of trouble,
The feeling of home has been a fairy tale to me,
I've been running and running and running,
since I can remember, since I could walk,
It just never stops,
- I grew up with a Mom, who would like,
we'd be at the nude beach,
and she'd be like, look I need to shave,
and just have like seaweed all over her crotch,
and I'd be like,
that's just like my Mom and my Aunt's humor,
and what I grew up with,
Girls are gross, vulgar, funny, hilarious,
super sexual beings,
I've always tried to make my personal social media
about who I am, really,
Welcome to Artsy Fartsy,
it's a new show where I fart on your art,
Nice art,
(piano music)
I think that it's really difficult for people to see
women's sexuality as our own,
and to see bodies as funny,
Like the Red Hot Chili Peppers,
like when they put socks on their cocks
and just fuckin' played a show,
they're like, that's hilarious,
Those guys are bros, it's so funny, it's wild like,
I started doing like the Merkin Monday things,
where I put like weird things on my crotch,
Merkins are a pubic wig from the 1400's,
in case there's like a little history blurb there,
- Hey can you give me some more cowbell on that?
- That's fucking gross,
That's gross, and they're like,
but if you're like, oh I just got out of the shower,
they're like, yeah that's hot,
That's fucking hot,
- Feeling lonely on a Friday night?
- We want to talk to you,
- What are you doing?
- Just sitting around,
I'm not showing you my body,
because I need your opinion on it,
I'm showing you my body because it's really funny,
I use Blondtron as a way to kind of like
be available to people to like,
critique or create discussion,
It's like a soapbox essentially,
Just a big-butted soapbox,
♪ Freaky bitches where you at ♪
- It's pretty sick,
but then I want to add some more like,
- Percussion and stuff?
- Yeah, like weird percussion
and even little bits of like samples of things,
and make it strange,
I get pretty sassy on my Twitter,
And I think I just tweeted, set your pussy free,
Then I just kept saying it,
and a lot of people retweeted it,
and then it just sort of became my catch phrase,
From a tweet to a song, yeah,
These girls that saw me at Bass Coast,
wrote me a message like a month and a half ago,
just saying like, you changed our lives when we saw that,
and we keep saying, set your pussy free,
And now they've started an organization,
and they're traveling all around the States,
- Okay, so we're here on Granville Island,
with the one and only Samantha Blondtron Fucking Matthews,
who set our pussy free at Bass Coast,
- A lot of people say, they're like,
oh you don't give a fuck,
and it's like the truth is I give a ton of fucks,
but I know that I will never please everyone,
Our vaginas are full of power and awesomeness,
and we are fucking hot, amazing, babely women,
that have so much to give,
(muffled)
- When her and I first started working together,
she had a lot of sort of like, ideas,
where she was, okay I want this kind of sound,
or this kind of sound, and for me,
it was like a really sort of awesome challenge
to try and get those sounds,
but through that journey
we ended up doing a bunch of different versions of it,
This I think is like the sound--
- Of now,
Sound of the future,
- What we--
- Because it's become bigger than me,
and the song hasn't even come out,
I like feel this tremendous amount of pressure
for it to be the most epic song of all time,
When I first started DJ-ing,
I didn't know any female DJ's,
I knew only men,
And when I asked men to teach me how to DJ,
they got the impression that I wanted to date them,
and when I made it clear
that I was really only interested in learning,
they weren't interested in teaching me anymore,
which is frustrating,
So finally I found a guy who had a girlfriend,
who would sit down and teach me a little bit,
- Electronic music really blurs the line between
engineering and creativity,
There is definitely a sonic difference
between male and female producers,
I think male producers tend to get carried away
with the engineering sound design,
and mixing side of things,
A lot of the time it's just like sound effects,
and producer porn really,
Whereas I find music that is made by skilled female artists,
tends to be how elegantly
can you make the listener feel things?
- Women can see the bigger picture,
and then put it back together,
For something like the crowd, at a festival,
people like all kinds of music,
oh you know exactly what to play for everyone, that's magic,
- Performing live, especially performing electronic music,
is a lot like sex with an audience,
whether that is making love,
or using other bodies to masturbate, is up to the performer,
In a lot of ways, male sexuality is just like,
penis goes in, penis goes in,
penis goes in,
If it was up to men, it would just be penises
thrusting all day,
Just like this wild boner forest, you know?
How would I describe the sexual feminine nature?
Well that's a hell of a question,
I need to get more wine, I'll be right back,
- Female sexual energy is so fucking insanely powerful,
that it's scary for a lot of people,
And when you start to tap into that,
and understand that creativity,
and the kind of drugs and the kind of reactions
that happen in our brains when we're sexually happy,
and we're comfortable
when we're having satisfying orgasms,
and we're with partners that we love,
when we feel supported in our community,
when we can make the art we want to make,
is just like earth-shatteringly powerful,
We have no end to it,
It's like a bottomless abyss of creative energy,
- It's my first time hearing her live,
- Do you think she's nervous?
- AppleCat, 20 minutes,
- I've performed all of my life,
one way or another,
hiding behind faces that suit me when I need them,
I've ended up with a collection of sorts,
So many faces, how am I choose?
What's right for today?
You, I remember you,
- I read this comic book once, when I was a kid,
It was one of the Sandman graphic novels,
and there was this character in it,
who depicted the goddess Ishtar,
and she was a stripper,
When she would dance, people would listen,
and they would watch, and they would be entranced,
The power came out in her dance,
and nobody could not pay attention,
I started dancing as a cam girl,
when I was 18,
and I started getting paid,
(sexy electronic music)
I could be whatever I wanted,
I just knew that I liked the attention,
and the power that came along with it,
I've never had a hard time creating masks for myself,
in fact, I prefer them,
It's letting people in, past that,
which is terrifying to me,
- When I was 15 years old, my freshman year of high school,
I just woke up one day and was in total pain
throughout my entire body,
(soft instrumental music)
(siren sounding)
- So, you think there are plants growing out of you?
I don't really see anything on your chart,
No chlorophyll in your blood work (chuckle),
- Really western medicine was not able to tell me
at that point, what was going on with me,
This isn't fair,
Imagine inescapable pain,
every minute,
every moment,
of your life,
In fact I was extremely depressed
and I wanted to kill myself
for years because of my condition,
The person I'm supposed to me, she's inside of me,
and that's what hurts, so much,
(gentle electronic music)
Eight years after my illness first appeared,
I was finally properly diagnosed,
I had Lyme disease,
(singing in foreign language)
So I knew I wanted to proceed with healing it,
which was gonna involve definitely the antibiotic treatment,
and the sort of western, nuke it, and rebuild attitude,
I also was meditating and doing a lot of other practices,
It was the least I could do, on my worst days,
and it turned out to be the absolute most important thing
I could have possibly done,
Absolutely critical in my healing,
(vocal music)
I really wanted to help other people experience that
healing vibration and the process of entraining
to sound consciously as a meditative practice,
How much can I convey in the repetition of one phrase?
And where does that one phrase take us?
(electronic and vocal music)
- Music is my god, I know not everybody's gonna say this,
but music is my god,
It changed my life, it saved my life,
Growing up in school was pretty hard for me,
I was very different,
I went to a school that was predominantly white,
And I was openly gay,
That caused me to get shoved into my locker often,
Going through a hard day of school, I would go home,
angry, upset,
What's the one thing that I can do
to let all of that out?
Put on some headphones and then go bang on my drums,
(electronic beats)
- Everybody connects with head banging,
That's one of the most common moves everybody does,
And I feel like that moment when everybody
is jumping down and banging their heads,
at my BPM,
everybody's heart rate starts to sync up,
We're all connected in our dance move,
we're all bouncing up and down,
We're all there,
I feel like that is when I can notice
that there's that locked in synchronicity between
the selector and the crowd,
And there's a certain waveform happening,
And I feel like that right there is when you
know that you have everybody super-connected,
And if I'm able to present my god to everybody,
and get everybody in sync with heartbeats and head bangin',
I'm living more than just life,
I'm living in bliss,
It was our last show of the summer,
back when I had been playing practically every weekend,
and the bikini body contest went like 20 minutes over,
We only have a 40 minute set,
I talked to the station manager, like look,
you guys are really behind,
I'll cut the first song and last song,
and can give you like maybe four or five more minutes?
And he's like, no no no, it's no problem,
We'll cut the DJ sets by five minutes at a time,
and make up for it,
I'm like, great, thanks so much for being willing,
don't worry about it,
I want more monitors,
and I will fight your dad,
18 minutes into our set, 18 minutes,
(muffled)
I'm like, no I'm playing for a half hour,
We hadn't even played one of our own songs yet,
And then they come back, and they're kind of doing
the guy behind you linger, intimidate thing,
and I'm not having it,
And the guy who wants to go on,
I guess it was his set time,
He really really wanted to play I guess,
I remember him coming back
and trying to pull the fader down on me,
which is like, a no,
You know when you get in a little bit of a blind rage,
you don't exactly remember how things went,
This is how I remember things going,
- Come on man, you're not even a fucking DJ,
(woman muffled)
You're not even a fucking DJ,
you're fucking playing off a MIDI player,
(confused argument)
- Misogyny isn't just like, hey baby,
It's four men standing behind a woman performing,
with their arms crossed tapping you on the shoulder,
because what they were doing was more important,
This shit has happened for so long,
and it has built right up to this moment,
where I'm like, fuck no, absolutely not,
Feminism isn't about going out there like rah every day,
but it's about recognizing when things are wrong,
And then, putting your foot down,
because it'll just keep happening if you don't stop it,
right there for you in that moment,
and this isn't about you,
it's about all the women before,
and all the women to come,
Eventually there'll just be half women on all the bills,
and no guys will come up and cut your time,
and they'll let you run over
'cause you're fucking killing it,
and that's just how it'll be,
(cheering)
Harmony, peace, love and joy,
(laughing)
- Hey, congrats on the show last night, Chloe,
- Thanks man,
It's too bad you couldn't be there,
(acoustic guitar music)
I just made this track, (muffled),
I just checked out the comments, and I saw this one,
which says, are you ghost produced by your boyfriend,
which means, basically,
do you have someone writing your music for you?
Or do you act like,
this is your music but it's not you who produced this?
It was funny because I never really had a boyfriend,
I only had girlfriends,
So I just wanted to make a joke publicly about that,
And I thought it was nice to put it on the web,
and see people's reaction to this,
And people were very upset,
Some people just made fun of him, too,
I got a lot of support from this,
Sometimes they don't believe it can still happen in 2016,
but there are still some problems like that,
and just sexist, I don't know why,
Because I'm a woman, I need to have someone else
writing my music for me,
or be the geek behind the computer,
I am a geek,
I can do it myself,
- Women grew up having like a lot of shit to think about,
like we have a lot of stuff to always think about,
Where like men think about things like,
this is a rock and I need to move this rock, got it,
And girls are like,
okay, well if I move that rock, and my kids are here,
and I've gotta think about that,
and who's gonna eat what, and like,
do I need to buy milk, and like,
you're thinking about how moving this rock
will affect the rest of your life,
- Hello, my name is Chloe,
and I am Mya's daughter,
and these are my drawings,
and I'm gonna tell you about them,
This is my Mom,
This is my Mom, and she is upstairs at the castle,
She went up these stairs and,
this is me down here,
watching the show, and that's her computer,
So I can come upstairs and,
DJ right here on her shoulders,
- Such cute little eyeballs you have,
- I know,
- I had Chloe when I was 21 years old,
I never really felt like this connection,
until I had her,
I realized what
true, unconditional love is,
Suddenly my brain just changed,
Everything in my heart and body and soul shifted,
I was still myself, but I was just this,
it was the next evolution of myself,
(violin music)
A lot of people,
especially people who are not in the industry
have this idea that DJ's make a whole lot of money,
It's not lucrative,
You gotta work your ass off for basically nothing,
Monday to Wednesday, I'm a bartender,
and then Wednesday to Saturday, I am a Mom,
and then Friday to Sunday,
I'm AppleCat,
I have very little room for anything else,
(dramatic electronic music)
- Hi baby, I miss you,
I was thinking yesterday, how much I miss you,
and that I was sad that I wasn't gonna be able to see you,
Baby,
wait wait wait,
hello?
(soft electronic music)
I got my first violin when I was three,
I never really felt like it was the thing,
it's just something that I always did,
like brushing your teeth, I just did it every day,
I played in orchestras and string ensembles,
- Check check, one two, check one two,
- Then I graduated from high school,
and I started showing up at club nights with my violin,
even when I wasn't really wanted there,
I saw that live and electronic could actually work,
really well together,
I feel like the violin is my voice,
It just gives me this conduit to express myself,
There's been a quite a few times where I could quit,
My violin was broken,
I'd built up to a certain level of a career,
and then, it was a couple of months in my life
where I thought maybe I didn't have a career,
But I'm always given something that just keeps me going
like a really big push, or someone comes into my life
that really encourages me, and supports me,
in this quest that I have
to find out the essence of me and my sound,
- Everything you need,
- I can't see it,
I don't know where to look,
What could possibly be in me?
- My biggest fear is not finding my medium
because it's not just music, it's not just writing,
it's not the business,
it's just this burning desire inside,
I almost live in fear that I'll like have that feeling
in my throat for the rest of my life,
that I'm not quite sane, exactly,
I can't articulate this feeling that I'm supposed
to do something important and create change,
- I've sort of been pushed into this grant program,
through Futurepreneur,
where they like take young entrepreneurs,
help them with their business plan,
help them to get funding, mentoring,
and all sorts of help, like starting a business,
I've sent in the initial paperwork,
and now I'm filling in things like,
asset transfer lists to like
prove that I've put my own personal investment
into the company,
Money usually makes me nervous,
but they tell me everything's good,
- Please, make it stop,
Damn it, it's not going to stop,
(siren sounding)
(beeping)
(singing in foreign language)
- Madeline woke up one morning in severe pain,
and collapsed on the ground, almost unable to move,
- I'm scared you know,
I'm scared that I'm not gonna get my health back,
I feel like I'm just gonna be sick
for the rest of my life,
- Madeline first messaged me actually online
when I was at college,
We instantly hit it off without ever seeing
any pictures of each other, ever speaking on the phone,
We just shared so many interests
that we became fast friends, over the internet,
- Sacha has been really amazing through this whole process,
He took me to the ER, he's been there at my surgery,
he's been there making me food,
and bringing me what I need
when I can't really move around,
- Madeline is my best friend,
She really is my partner,
I'm just trying to be there for her
as much as I can in the hopes that
I can help her get through this,
(upbeat electronic music)
- It's really hard to plan for the future,
and what I'm gonna do with music,
It's been hard to write music,
I feel myself pushing him away,
and I feel myself pushing other people, everyone, away,
because
you just get thrown into this process
of having to face yourself,
and having to face like the darkest shadows
of who you are in your being,
because you are hit with this pain and this suffering,
that you have to feel through,
and that becomes your quest,
that becomes your purpose,
- I applied to the Futurepreneur program
which is through the BBC of Canada,
They're like, everything looks good,
I got approved for $36,000,
They said I'd have the money on February 18th,
and after the 18th I got a letter,
from the BBC,
saying that due to the graphic and vulgar nature
of my work as Blondtron,
that they would not be giving me the money,
That was like a really big blow,
- This is the broken bot from the rogue pod,
- It doesn't look broken to me,
- I don't know how, or why,
it would have gotten out of the warehouse,
- Hey I can talk to you,
Just hear me out,
- This thing needs a complete reformat,
Take it away,
- Get off me,
- This is what I don't understand is like,
my body's hilarious, women are hilarious,
life's hilarious,
and nothing is meant to be taken too seriously,
so you know,
set your pussy free,
But there's no place for that in the business world,
and so many people have been like,
maybe just while you're applying for funding,
just like tone it down,
or like make your things private,
I don't want to live in a world
where I'm not both of these things,
I'm not a brilliant business woman
with a great entrepreneurial spirit,
and a DJ that makes music
and talks about vaginas and sex,
which is a complete and utter lie,
because I am exactly both of those things,
- Shut down, override,
Error,
error,
♪ Well I don't like it ♪
♪ Even though we've been together for some time now ♪
♪ It seems you're always out ♪
♪ When I'm in for a good conversation ♪
- I'm in Los Angeles,
My friends down here that have helped me with my business,
are just like, just get down here, everything will be fine,
and sure enough,
I pulled myself out of it and came down here,
How are you fluffy fluffs?
The fluffiest dog I've ever seen?
Coming out of music,
I was really geeked out on this VR stuff,
It's like everything's a collage,
it's like cutting out pieces of the real world,
and then like putting them
into virtual reality, it's so cool,
There's people doing it but not as much as they
could be obviously,
It's like a new rush for me,
because I'm kind of used to like being
like on a stage and performing,
and it's a whole different rush, you know,
It's fun, I really like it,
I'll give you a few of my cards there,
if you have some friends that you might
want to send my way, or anything too,
I'm super, super pumped,
(phone ringing)
- Hi love,
- Hi Mom,
Nice hair,
- This is the lipstick you put on yourself
in the back of the car when you were 15 months old,
- No it's not,
Is it the same tube of lipstick?
- You went into my purse
when you were riding in your car seat,
You said, Mama look,
And I turned around to look,
and there it was all over your face,
You started putting lipstick on really early,
- Wow, amazing, well it looks better on you, I'm sure,
- Eating okay?
- Yeah, eating well,
buying shit from Trader Joe's, and cooking here,
You know when you're cooking for one,
You know me, I just put everything into a taco,
- That's okay,
- The lonely taco club,
(electronic music)
Every year, like right before Burning Man,
I'm like, I'm not going this year, it's too much work,
I'm tired, I don't want to do it any more,
And then I always end up here, and I'm like,
how did I ever doubt this?
I have to go every year,
It's like a cycle,
Here you have the lightest of the light
and the darkest of the dark,
Burning Man is a place where literally everything exists,
because you can create anything that you want,
The rules just don't apply here,
(electronic music)
- It's cold in the desert,
I had a set tonight on the Sub Stage,
the Cosmic Tea House, but
the person who was running it
just didn't show up to open it,
So, I'm not playing,
I was looking forward to that,
And I felt like I needed it,
My Mom's actually the first person
who told me about Burning Man,
I was like 15, and she told me the story
about this amazing place of art and culture
and music and love,
and she said it with such longing in her eyes,
It's like, there's this place,
and like it was the furthest place in the world,
And I was like, I'm going to go to that place,
- All right, welcome home,
(cheering)
So what I always start with is the mission statement
of the Temple Guardians,
which is the Temple Guardians hold the space of the temple,
maintain an environment that allows equal access
for everyone to have the experience,
and expression that they need,
and to keep the temple itself,
as well as the participants who visit it, safe,
The temple, I often tell people,
the temple is what people need it to be
at the moment that they are there,
(soft electronic music)
- I'm grieving old stories
that have been weighing me down,
with no place to put them,
I'm grieving expectations, relationships,
parents, goals,
just human things,
and I need to let that go,
(dramatic electronic music)
- The wounding that we are offered in the world,
is actually quite a sacred gift,
We're wounded in a very specific way,
that allows us to be rent open to the world,
in a very precise manner,
that allows our particular genius to come through,
We come from a belief system that devalues
all functions and roles having to do with feminine power,
which required us to adopt masculine traits
and masculine characteristics in order to
be seen as anything worthy of status,
What's happening on the ground now, for women,
is an understanding that in order for us to have power,
we have to understand what is essential to
the female body,
When it comes to this idea of feminism,
it's not equality in terms of neutralizing,
but it's in fact diversity that is what we are seeking,
(instrumental music)
We are in a time of great unraveling,
We don't have any idea what's ahead of us,
What is so critical at this time,
is for the dark feminine to take her place,
in order for human culture not merely to be sustainable,
but in fact to thrive,
and to evolve into ever more
brilliant iterations of itself,
(light electronic music)
- My next challenge with my current phase
of the Lux Moderna project,
is that with the DJ model of performance,
it's like there's a booth,
and I stand behind the booth,
I've just been modeling my performance
off of what other people do,
which is a bunch of knob-twisting
and standing and bobbing,
I really want to liberate myself,
to move,
My father's an archer and he
shot and killed a buck, straight to the heart,
in our yard at home,
so I'm about to bind the antlers that my father gave me,
and use them as part of my head piece,
during my performance at Sonic Bloom,
I guess I'm a little worried that
people might perceive me as kind of a creature,
or like really weird,
I'm realizing more and more
that I need to be unapologetic in my art,
and just let it affect people
the way it's gonna affect them,
(mumbling)
This is a huge deal for me moving forward,
(dramatic violin and beat music)
- I have a track in which the vocals are, watch me,
It sounds like it's about a boy,
It's not, it's about my own battle with my own thoughts,
and when I wrote it,
it was actually in response to the watch me was,
you think I can't do it,
watch me prove you wrong,
I needed to take that attitude
of like, watch me do it,
just to be able to have the courage,
it was this kind of like necessary aggression,
in order to like stand up,
and be like, yes I'm a girl, yes there are that many of us,
and I'm doing it anyway,
And now, it's different,
with what's shifted
with my own femininity and understanding,
it's bringing those frequencies into my body,
and the way that I move informs the way
that they're gonna move,
Women are sort of more known for being
emotional, and have emotional intelligence,
and lead things through their heart,
And I'm thinking differently about DJ-ing now,
and more comfortable and accepting
of the fact that I'm a woman onstage,
So it's a whole different kind of watch me,
- The way that this performance is going
is it's the energy of
Oneness with the universe into birth
and differentiation,
Just as soon as it gets into that underworld
vibe for a moment, I'd love for us all to come together,
Just like be together,
and see where we go from there,
Yeah, exactly,
For the last part of the song I need to be alone onstage,
and like die alone,
Just so you know,
- I'll just watch you,
(electronic music)
- I couldn't sleep at all,
except for one tiny little sliver of sleep,
And I only know I was asleep because I had a dream,
(electronic music)
- So we all go through these challenges,
and we all go through these birthing processes
with ourselves where we're met with hardship,
and all these things that come to us in our lives that
sometimes seem like a curse,
Once you go through that process,
once you go through the underworld,
that's Lux Moderna, is that point of light on the horizon,
that is coming to meet you after you've gone
through that journey through the night,
I chose Lux Moderna as a name,
because it's the new light, it's the new consciousness,
that comes with going through the process of life,
(electronic music)
(dramatic electronic music)
- Mama? Chloe,
You startled me,
- Why are you wearing that mask?
It's silly,
- I always wear them,
They're, I,
you're right,
I don't need them, do I?
Thank you for everything,
But I don't need you today,
- Give 'em one quick ditty,
- One at a time, honey,
- Yeah, don't let them all eat them,
- That's not what I want, I meant to eat this,
Now don't go down there,
- My Mom was a child when she had me,
She did her damn well best to tell me that,
it was okay to be me,
But at the same time, she didn't know who she was,
And she certainly hadn't been held
in any sort of community,
One of our most hidden parts of ourself, is our sexuality,
Why can't there be a safe, sober,
loving, welcoming, place,
for people to explore that?
And so we decided you know, fuck this,
We're gonna do our own thing,
Hi Melina, it's Mya,
I'm just calling to let you know
that I picked up the tickets from Why Not's,
and from Venus and Mars,
and they both sold out completely,
I should be going to the venue around seven o'clock,
So I'll see you then,
give me a text message or whatever,
(middle eastern electronic music)
- Erotica Electronica, is an event I created,
You can be and do what you like there,
as long as it's respectful of everybody else,
How's everybody feeling tonight?
(crowd cheering)
It's Erotica Electronica Vancouver!
(exotic electronic music)
I've had people tell me they feel at home
within themselves for the first time,
And that is the first time
that I've ever felt like I could actually be home,
(exotic electronic music)
Being different can be really lonely,
and being on a path can be really lonely,
Now I realize the immense value that collaboration has,
I've always loved like tech,
and I like, I like other people's passions,
That's what makes me feel passionate,
In a way that's what DJ-ing is,
You get passionate about other people's music,
and then you start to create your own,
or you create your own,
but DJ-ing is like, it's part of you,
Some of it's my music,
It's also just being crazy hyped on other people's passions,
So it's this collaboration constantly,
You're constantly like okay this is me and my music,
and then this is everybody else's,
♪ Oh hey there ♪
♪ Let me take you on a ride ♪
♪ A ride through the information superhighway ♪
♪ A place where we can remix reality ♪
- Links as portals, websites as rooms,
Rooms that you can visit,
or should I say, we can visit,
Collaboration,
rapid iteration,
real-time creation,
- VR and the metaverse, and like,
connecting everybody through portals,
it's like, it's a fuckin' vagina man,
Like what we're trying to build,
which basically like has to start with the question,
what kind of world do you want to live in?
We need male energy to like drive things forward,
and we need that kind of like
linear movement sometimes,
but it needs to be pushing this like big Earth ball,
It needs to be pushing the sphere,
That to me is an answer that comes from the feminine,
Our very nature is to look at the big picture,
People like me, and a lot of other women
who can see how it all works together,
now we're moving into this new era,
and you need my point of view, too,
This is totally set your pussy free,
This is where you get to be the best you,
This is where you find your own value,
This is where you look inside yourself and say,
I am so fucking worth it, holy fuck,
(crowd cheering)
Right here,
Everybody has a pussy they can set free,
They won't listen if it's just one voice,
But maybe, maybe with all of our voices together,
they'll have to listen,
- Set your pussy free,
Set your pussy free,
(electronic music)
(lyrics muffled)
(bright electronic music)
- That's a wrap,
That's a wrap?
(speaking in foreign language)
- It means like, we're done,
(speaking in foreign language)
- We're done,
- Yeah but this way it's not with the food,
So we can just say,
Et voila, c'est fini,
C'est fini?
- C'est fini,