Part 1 JUSTINE
Sir,,,
You can back up a little more if you want,,, I think you need that extra,,,
I don't think he can hear you,
Sir, can you hear me up there?
Can you copy, sailor?
I think he's in a different county,,,
It's like five feet,
And now he stops, He's got five feet here,
That's good, Stop, stop, stop, stop!
Wait, wait, wait!
You're a little close, I think he can keep going a little bit, maybe,
Oh, no, no, no, He can't, I don't,,,
Be careful, please, It is not my car, I will,
I promise,
Turn around to the left, please, Stop there, sir,
Straighten up, sir,
Yeah, I think I'm good there, right?
You're not even looking,
I can see it's not looking good,
I'm a very experienced driver,,,
It's like really close on that side, Really?
Yeah, don't go any further forward, Just straight,,,
How do I put it in,,,?
What?
This way?
Get out of the way,
Come on,
Sorry,
Yes, I know,
We're sorry,
I won't even bother saying how late you are,
Sorry, We're really sorry,
Hi,
Hi, Claire, So sorry,
Hi,
We probably should have taken something smaller,
This brilliant idea was yours of renting a stretch,
This is very much not my project, okay?
I spent the whole week with the dullest man on earth,
Not to mention the most expensive wedding planner on the planet,
Okay, so you want this?
Yeah, of course,
So, when you're there,,, and that was two hours ago,
Okay,
All right, let's go,
What star is that?
I don't know,
John, you're a bit of an expert on stars, aren't you?
I wouldn't say that,
Oh, yes you would,
Which one are you looking at exactly?
The red one,
I'm amazed you can see that,
That's Antares, It's the main star in the Scorpio constellation,
Justine,,,
We just have to go to the stables to say hello to Abraham,
No, you're not, Oh, yes,
Who's Abraham?
Abraham,
Look, I'm married,
Michael's my husband now,
I'm sure you two will like each other,
Nice to meet you,
I'm his mistress, I'm the only one who can ride him,
That's not exactly true,
What? Occasionally I take her for a ride,
See you later,
I can no longer be silent, All the guests are waiting for more than two hours,
I know,
I'm at the end of my rope,
Welcome to the reception of Mr, Steinam, Mr, Marko,
Thank you, Thank you, Little Father,
Would you be so good as to to participate in the wedding bean lottery?
Of course,
Please submit your bid as to the total number of beans in the bottle,
Yes, er,,, two million and six beans,
Two million and six beans,
Would you care to make a bid on behalf of your wife?
Oh, I don't dare to do that, I really don't,
Very well, we'll let madam's bid remain open,
We made it,
Hi, Mom,
Love that dress,
Congratulations Aunt Steelbreaker,
Thanks, Leo,
What's this? A dagger,
Wow!
Sweetheart,
Let me introduce you, This is Betty,,, and Betty,
Betty and Betty, this is my daughter, Justine,
Hi, nice to meet you,
I'm gonna say hi to everybody, Of course, of course,
Ladies and gentlemen,,,
We waited a while for this, A toast to the bride and the groom,
Justine and Michael,
The tray must go left to right,,,
From left to right,
Justine, I don't want to make a speech,
Why? Please,
What are you doing?
You'll see,
Excuse me,
Neither of the ladies sitting next to me has been given a spoon,
I'd like very much to have one,
Excuse me,
You're terrible,
Waiter,
Justine, would you mind slapping your father for me hard, please,
Tim,
Justine, listen up, goddammit,
As most of you know, I'm here tonight playing sort of a double role,
On Michael's side, I'm best man,
And, coincidentally, I'm also the employer of the bride,
I've got nothing bad to say about the groom, but,,,
The bride,,,
Justine,,,
Gorgeous woman,,,
Where's my tagline?
You were always great in coming up with a tagline in a hurry,
What happened?
Did your emotional life suddenly take over?
Did finding the man of your life render you unable to work?
I'm just asking because if I were to choose between
a woman for my dear friend Michael and an employee,,,
I would always choose the employee,
Advertising, Justine, advertising,
Justine, you were way, way, way too good for advertising,
You know it, I know it, we all know it,
So thank you for staying with it,
I'm gonna let you and the rest of you think about this tagline now
while I leak a bit of news,
Today the company hasn't lost a copywriter,,,
The company has gained a new art director,
And that's you, Justine,
Congratulations,
Goddammit, you earned it,
The father of the bride wants a word,
My dear girl, you look,,,
glowing today,
And me, I'm just a little confused what with all the Bettys at my table,
Never seen you look so happy,
So, what can say without talking about your mother?
My wife of yesteryear,
Which is exactly what I don't wish to do,
I don't think that I would be revealing any secret if I were to say
that she can be very domineering at times,
Domineering?
What a load of crap!
For those who don't know who I am, I'm Claire and Justine's mother,
Justine, if you have any ambition at all,
it certainly doesn't come from your father's side of the family,
Yes,
I wasn't at the church, I don't believe in marriage,
Claire, whom I have always taken for a sensible girl,
you've arranged a spectacular party,
Till death do us part and forever and ever,,, Justine and Michael,
I just have one thing to say,,,
Enjoy it while it lasts,
I myself hate marriages,
Gaby, please,
Especially when they involve my closest family members,
Why did you even bother coming?
Justine, come with me,
Listen to me, We agreed that you weren't going to make any scenes tonight,
The don't want any scenes,
No, we don't!
No,
Look at me when I'm talking to you,
But I didn't do anything,
You know what I mean,
Okay,
Katherine has demanded the floor,
Where is the bride?
I've looked everywhere, no bride,
Now the groom is going to give a speech for the bride,
Dear Justine,,,
What are you doing to me? I've never given a speech before,
I'm serious, I've never given a speech before,
Justine is the speaker, She can say the most wonderful things, but,,,
Then let her make the speech, damn it,
Justine,,,
I love you so much,,,
And never dreamed that I would have such a gorgeous wife,
I believe that I'm the luckiest man on Earth,
I love you,
That's kind of it, That's all I have,
Hello, everyone, we're going to move to the living room
so that we can clear some tables,
Then the newlyweds will dance,
And then, at eleven thirty, the bride and groom will cut the cake in here,
He wants to be put to bed,
Sweety, you did so good,
I wanna do it,
No, tonight's your night, No, please,
Are you sure? Yeah, come on,
Good night, sweetheart, Come on, come here,
Are you comfortable?
When are we gonna build caves together?
We're gonna build lots of caves together, Just not tonight,
You're still my aunt Steelbreaker, aren't you?
Yes, It's exactly who I am,
Justine,,,
Hi, Claire,
I'm just taking a little nap,
Don't nap, it's your wedding,
You're not even halfway through yet,
No, you're right,
I have to pull myself together,
What's going on, Justine?
I'm trudging in through this,,,
Praying really hard,
It's clinging to my legs,
It's really heavy to drag along,
No, you're not,
I know you'll hate to hear it,
Don't say a word to Michael,
You think I'm stupid?
I'll get her,
And my mom, too, Yeah,
Justine, It's John, We're ready to cut the cake, sweetheart,
Please come downstairs as soon as you can, okay?
Gaby,,,
Gaby, I'm sorry to disturb you, but we're ready to cut the cake,
When Justine took her first crap on her potty, I wasn't there,
When she had her first sexual intercourse, I wasn't there,
So give me a break, please, with all your fucking rituals,
Unbelievable, fucking unbelievable,
Everyone, thank you for being so patient,
We're just having a little issue with the wedding dress, She'll be right down,
Those bitches have locked themselves in their bedrooms and now they're taking a bath,
Is everybody in your family stark raving mad?
This is embarrassing, I know,
We should have put showers in the guest wing, I've said it a hundred times,
For fuck's sakes, if people want to linger in a bath, stay at home,
Here we offer you an 18 hole golf course, where else would they get that?
Nowhere,
Unbelievable!
That's it, she's out, What, Justine?
Your mother,
Unbelievable,
She ruined my wedding, I will not look at her,
Outstanding,
My God, we cut it,
I'm sorry,
No, don't say that,
You should never say you're sorry,
I can see that you're not feeling well tonight,
You should have seen you weren't ready yesterday,
I haven't been taking care of you lately,
It's my fault,
Can we talk somewhere? Of course,
Sit down, please,
I wasn't going to give you this until tomorrow,
I found our plot of land,
They call it Empire apples,
They're bright red and very sweet,
But with the perfect tartness,
I had one as a kid,
Beautiful, huh?
In ten years' time, when the trees have grown you can sit in the shade, in a chair,
If you still have days when you're feeling a little sad,,,
I think that will make you happy again,
It's very sweet,
Yeah?
No wonder you've been so busy,
I signed the deed for it yesterday, I didn't want to tell you,
Here,
No, you should have it,
I want you to have it with you all the time and hold on to it,
So you can look at it once in a while,
I'll always keep with me,
Maybe we can have a little swing hanging from one of the trees,
We'll talk about that when the time comes,
Yeah, no,,, of course,
When the time comes,
Goodbye,
You'd better be goddamn happy,
Yes, I should be,
I really should be,
Do you have any idea how much this party cost me? A ballpark figure?
No,
I don't,
Should I? Yes, I think you should,
A great deal of money,
A huge amount of money,
In fact, for most people, an arm and a leg,
I hope you feel it's well spent,
Well, that depends on whether or not we have a deal,
A deal? Yes, a deal,
That you'll be happy,
Yes, of course, Of course we have a deal,
Good,
Congratulations,
I tried to throw your mother out,
Yes, you usually do,
Yes, I do,
Thank you,
It's a wonderful party you've given me,
How many holes are on our golf course?
Eighteen,
That's right,
Happy? Yeah,
This is the young man,
Congratulations, Thank you,
I'm Tim, Hi, Tim,
Tim started working for us two days ago,
He happens to be my nephew, but ignore that,
Tim thought I wouldn't be able to squeeze that tagline out of you tonight,
I thought it might be difficult,
You're colleagues, I hired him the moment I heard about his education,
What education is perfect if you want to make it in Public Relations?
Tim?
None at all, of course,
It was almost too perfect,
He knows nothing, I hired him on the spot,
And at a very good salary, What do you say, Tim?
A very good salary,
Welcome, then, Tim,
There's just a slight catch to a very good job with a very good salary,
The salary is very good,
Why, what are you pushing Tim into doing?
To get that damn tagline out of you tonight,
Otherwise he's out on his ear, which sucks, considering the debts he's in,
Goodbye,
Once you give her a job, she won't let go,
You gotta be there at the time of birth, so you follow her now,
I mean, get that tagline,
Do let me know if the tagline's there and I'll jot it down,
Spare me,
I'll go out for a minute,
I'm really sorry,
I'm thrilled about this wedding and I know it's costing John a lot of money,
John's filthy mouth,,, He needs to shut up about it,
It's not about the cost,
It's just that I thought you really wanted this,
But I do,
Michael has tried to get through to you all evening to no avail,
That's not true,
I smile and smile and smile,,,
You're lying to all of us,
Don't you miss this?
What do you want in this place?
You've no business here,
Nor have I,
Your sister, it seems, is somewhat bewitched by you,
Mom,,,
I'm a bit scared,
A bit?
I'd be scared out of my wits if I were you,
No, it's something else, I,,,
I'm frightened, Mom,
I have trouble walking properly,
You can still wobble, I see,
So just wobble the hell out of here,
Stop dreaming, Justine,
I'm scared, We all are, sweetie,
Just forget it, Get the hell out of here,
No, thanks,
Everybody, excuse me,
Could you all follow us outside, please,
Betty, Betty, Betty,,,
Another glass, please,
Are you really called Betty?
No sir, sorry, Don't worry about it,
Dad, can we talk?
Could you sit with me for a little while?
Wait, What?
Wait,
Get out of me,
Michael, can you give me a moment? What's happened?
Just give me a moment, please, What's happened?
Can I have a moment, please?
Yeah,,, of course,
Can you zip me?
Are you okay?
Okay,
Hi,
Good night, Have a good time,
I'm on my way home, my darling,
Please, Dad, I really need to talk to you,
Little Father,,,
My dad would like to spend the night, Is there a room available?
Room number eight is vacant,
We could prepare that for your father,
Well,, Yes, my father likes that,
Then we can have breakfast in the morning,
Justine,,,
Why don't you come and have onion soup with us?
Tim, Get us some soup,
How's your wonderful night going?
It's too bad about Tim,
What about Tim?
He got fired,
He didn't last many hours in the business, but,,,
then again, it's a rather unpredictable one, you're king one day and beggar the next,
So you go back to wherever you came from, right buddy?
I'm glad we found each other, Jack, I was looking for you,
Didn't I tell you? She can't stop working, not even on your wedding night,
I had nothing at the dinner,,,
But I've been playing with an idea for a small campaign,
The problem is, how do we effectively hook a group of minors
on our substandard product,
preferably in a habit-forming way?
And I've reached a conclusion in regards to the tagline,
I was just thinking, what if,,,
instead,,,
we try to sell you to the public, Jack?
Then, surprisingly, I arrived right back where I started from,
At nothing,
Nothing? It's not such a bad tagline, Jack,
Would my newly fledged aide please expand a little on the thoughts of the tagline?
Nothing is too much for you, Jack,
I hate you and your firm so deeply
I couldn't find the words to describe it,
You are a despicable, power-hungry little man, Jack,
Is that a resignation?
'Cause there aren't too many jobs out there, I tell you,
I broke my plate,
So I,,,
I guess we'll,,,
take off now,
Yes,
This could have been a lot different,
Yes, Michael, that have been,
But, Michael,,,
what did you expect?
Yeah,
You're right,
Claire,,,
Sometimes, I hate you so much,
The way I see it, you're now short of a boss and a husband,
Could I, in all my humility, offer my services?
You have the ideas, I have the head for business,
We could be the perfect couple,
We've had good sex,
I don't think that's a very good idea,
No,
Excuse me, the result is ready,
What?
The number of beans in the bottle has been arrived at,
And?
Six hundred and seventy-eight, That's the final count,
Six hundred and seventy-eight?
And none of the guests got it right,
Really?
Some were pretty close, but no one guessed right,
Incredible, You could say that,
Incredibly trivial,
But that's the result of the competition,
And a lot of people would like to know the result,
And then there is the prize,
Throw it away,
Dad,,,
To my beloved daughter, Betty,
I'm as proud of you as any father could be,
But I couldn't find you and I was offered a ride home I couldn't refuse,
See you soon, Kisses from your stupid dad,
Justine, wake up,
Wake up,
We're going for a ride,
I tried, Claire,
Yes, you did,
You really did,
Come on,
Come on, Abraham, come,
Come on, lets go, Come on!
The red star is missing from Scorpio,
Antares is no longer there,
Part 2 CLAIRE
I swear to God, your sister can't do anything by herself,
Hello, darling, How are you?
Just do as I've told you,
There's a taxi down the street waiting for you, I already told her that,
Just open the door, and get in,
Unbelievable,
Just get in the cab, darling,
Well, then call me back if you can't make it to the cab,
We'll pay for it when you arrive, Don't worry about it,
We'll see about that,
I love you, darling,
Please, John, she's my sister, Oh, please!
She's a bad influence on you and Leo,
She's ill,
Right,
Have you been going online again?
Claire, you promised,
I'm afraid of that stupid planet, That stupid planet?
That wonderful planet, you mean,
First it was black, now it's blue,
Blocking Antares, hiding behind the sun,
Darling, this is going to be the most amazing experience we will have in our lives,
It won't be here in five days, and it is not going to hit us,
Just like it didn't hit Mercury, as we knew it wouldn't,
And it didn't hit Venus, as we well knew it wouldn't,
And it won't hit Earth, as we know it won't,
Claire, look at me,
Sweetheart, you have to trust a scientist,
They say that it will hit,,,
No they don't, that's not true,
Not the real scientists,
Now, the prophets of doom they'll write whatever they can to get attract attention,
But the real scientists, all of them agree,
Melancholy is just gonna pass right in front of us,
And it's gonna be the most beautiful sight ever,
Now, I wish you'd watch it through the telescope with me,
Please, No, I'd better not,
Son of a bitch,
When are we going to build those caves, Aunt Steelbreaker?
Sweetheart, not right now, We're gonna do that in a little while,
Okay?
She's still sleeping,
Yes, but she has to get up now,
What are you making?
Meatloaf,
Meatloaf? Yes,
If that's doesn't get her out of bed, nothing will,
Time to wake up, Justine, No more sleeping,
Going to take you to a nice bath, How would you like that? Come on,
You'll see you'll like it, I promise, Come on,
I'll wash you, okay?
Just lift your foot,
Go on,
Lift your foot,
You need a bath,
You need to wash, Right? I'm so tired,,,
Come on, try,
I can not,
Justine, you'll like it,
See?
It's nice, it's a nice bath,
Justine,,, Please,
Okay, so,,,
We've practiced for tomorrow,
And I have a surprise for you for dinner,
Can you smell it?
Meatloaf?
Surprise!
It tastes like ashes,
It's all right, sis,
Auntie Steelbreaker's crying, Don't worry, son,
Do you want to go back up?
May I be excused?
Take one more bite,
Look,
It's a planet that has been hiding behind the sun,
And now it passes by us,
It's called a Fly by,
It's not something you need to frighten aunt Steelbreaker with now,
If you think I'm afraid of a planet, then you're too stupid,
Just a few things we're gonna need in case of Melancholy gets really close,
Look, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't mention this to Claire,
She gets anxious so easily,
Come on, Justine,
Take it, That's it,
Come on, Justine, take him out,
Justine, take him out!
Come on,
Come on!
Don't beat him!
Come on!
Justine, don't beat him!
Stop,
There it is,
There's your Fly by,
You don't touch the instrument, Come on Leo,
Look,
Our son has invented a very fine device,
If you adjust the steel and point it towards the planet from your chest
it'll tell you how fast it's approaching and ultimately how fast it will recede,
Okay,
Leo,,,
What are we excited about?
Tomorrow night, That's right,
Wow, that's amazing,
Amazing isn't it? Let me look,
Earth & Melancholia Dance of Death
John!
Coming,
We're prepared for this, The power will be back on in a few days,
Claire,,,
Tomorrow evening Melancholy will pass us by
and you'll never have to see it again, okay?
So it won't hit us?
Not a chance,
What if your scientists have miscalculated and,,,
They haven't,
You promise?
Of course I do,
I promise,
It's rising again,
Just like the moon,
Because of the Earth's rotation,
Exactly like they said it would,
Are you hungry? No, thanks,
Are you okay? Yeah,
Do you plan to kill us all?
Maybe I should take those, Don't touch them,
Don't you touch them,
Justine, come and have a bath, I've had a bath,
Really? Yes, I'm very clean,
Little Father didn't come to work,
I checked the noteboard, He didn't leave one,
I tried to call him, but maybe something's wrong with the phone,
You see, it's never happened before that he didn't come to work without giving us notice,
Does he have a family?
He lives in the village,,,
I do not know if he has a family,
Maybe this is a time when he needs to be with them,
It'll pass us by tonight,
John is quite calm about it,
Does that calm you down?
Yes, of course,
Well, John studies things, He always has,
The earth is evil,
We don't need to grieve for it,
What?
Nobody will miss it,
But where would Leo grow up?
All I know is,,,
Life on earth is evil,
There may be life somewhere else,
No, there isn't,
How do you know?
Because I know things,
Oh, yes, you always imagine, you did,
I know we're alone,
I don't think you know that at all,
Six hundred and seventy-eight,
The bean lottery,
Nobody guessed the amount of beans in the bottle,
No, that's right,
But I know,
Six hundred and seventy-eight,
Well, perhaps,,,
What does that prove?
That I know things,
And when I say we're alone,,,
We're alone,
Life exists only on Earth,
And not for long,
I can stay up all evening till the middle of the night,,,
when we get to see the planet fly by, and I get to look at the telescope,
Yes, of course, darling,
But are you sure you can stay up that late?
You haven't slept much lately,
Yes, I can,
Can't I, Auntie Steelbreaker?
Can't I? Yes, you can, Of course you can,
It's eleven, It's almost here,
Leo, sweetheart,
It's time to wake up,
Leo,
There,
Leo should be watching this,
My God,
There,
Take a look,
Are you afraid?
No, it looks,,,
It looks friendly,
Yes,
That's what I've been trying to explain to you,
My God,
I'd like to raise a toast,
To life,
To life? What do you mean, to life?
You said it was going to be okay,
There was no sense in alarming everybody,
So, you're saying that our lives were in danger?
No, I was saying,,,
No, I'm saying that when dealing with science and calculations of this magnitude,,,
you have to account for a margin of error, That's all I'm saying,
I'm sorry,
It's not fun any more,
Actually it's moving away from us as we speak,
You just can't see it through the naked eye,
Come here,
Put this to your chest,
Aim it up at the planet, Hold on,
Is that right? Yes,
In five minutes,,, it'll be smaller,
I can't breathe, Just relax, relax,
This is normal, It's taking part of our atmosphere,
For a little while, it's gonna make us winded,
Just try and breathe calmly,
Just breathe,
There you go,
Just try to breathe calmly,
There you go,
Please, can I look now?
Of course,
It's smaller,
Of course it is,
It's smaller! It's smaller!
Sure, Of course it is,
It's moving away from us at over sixty thousand miles an hour,
For heaven's sake,,,
Come here,
Mom,,,
We have to stay up,,,
I wanna look through the telescope,,,
Breathe calmly,
Be happy, please,
If I dare, you can do it,
I'm happy you're happy,
You have it easy, don't you?
I imagined the worst thing possible,
That's right, Claire, Sometimes it's easy being me,
Hi, darling,
Do you want tea? No, thank you,
Something to drink?
John!
John,
John!
I can't find John, Do you know where he is?
No,
I was just listening,
There's something different,
The horses,,, They've come down,
John,,,
Good morning, Mom,
Get a blanket,
Justine, breakfast,
Where's John?
He rode to the village,
Why didn't he just take the car?
Abraham needed a ride,
Since you never ride him,
Come with me,
Justine,,,
Come!
Claire,,,
Claire, Dammit,,, what,,,?
Claire,
Where are you going? To the village, Come,
This has nothing to do with the village,
Get in!
I want us to be together when it happens,
Outside on the terrace,
Help me, Justine,
I want to do this the right way,
Better do it quickly,
A glass of wine together, maybe?
You want me to have a glass of wine on your terrace?
Yes, would you do it, sis?
How about a song?
Beethoven's Ninth,,,
Something like that?
Perhaps we could light some candles,
You just want us all to gather on your terrace
sing a song and have a glass of wine,,,
the three of us,
Yes, that would make me happy,
Do you know what I think of your plan?
No,
I only think that he might like it,
I think it's a piece of shit,
Justine, please,,,
I just wanted to be nice,
Nice?
Why don't we meet in the fucking toilet?
Then let's not,
You're damn right, let's not,
Sometimes I hate you so much, Justine,
I'm afraid that the planet will hit us, anyway,
Don't be,,, please,
Dad said there is nothing to do, then,,,
Nowhere to hide,
If your dad said that, then he's forgotten about something,
He's forgotten about the magic cave,
The magic cave,,, Yep,
Is that something everybody can make?
Aunt Steelbreaker can,
All right, let's go find stick, all right?
Hold my hand,