رسانه اینترنتی مای موویز MyMoviz جامعترین سایت فیلم و سریال
[♪♪♪]
[MANI MOANING]
LEX: Good job,
I need to do the thing where I'm,,,
Oh, Yeah, Can you just pull out slow?
Yeah, I'll do it, do it slow, Yeah,
All right, Doing it slow, Are you Kegeling?
Kegel, Kegel,,,
[EXHALES]
[IN BRITISH ACCENT] One million sperm will make the trip,
[LAUGHING] Some won't return back home,
One million sperm, Sperm, Whoo,
You're so cute, You're so cute,
Babe? Yeah?
I'm freaking out because Peggy and Mia asked me
to write their vows,
and I already have to make their cake,
It's extremely overwhelming,
Oh, your friends are already stressing me out,
I know, I'm sorry,
I don't wanna go to this wedding,
I just wanna stay here with you,
We ought to tell them we got food poisoning,
Yes, That our butts hurt,
Yes, There's no cure,
Yes, [CHUCKLES]
What if instead we go to New York
and we surprise my mom for her birthday?
Are you being serious right now?
We can't not go,
Oh, I-- No, I thought you didn't wanna go,
Do you not wanna go?
Of course I wanna go,
[JUICER WHIRRING]
[RINGTONE PLAYING]
Happy birthday! Hi! Mwah, mwah, mwah!
How you doing, baby? Mwah, mwah,
I love you, How you doing?
Oh, I love you too, Why you screening my calls?
I vow to cherish you,
I vow to be your rock, Which is so cliché,
Your rock, God, Fucking hate this,
Look at this spread, baby, Look at that,
Man, this potato batter is freaking good,
It looks so good, What you eating?
I know it's not as good as what we having here,
I got juice, Juice? What?
Yeah, it's good for the uterine lining,
You know I'm trying to make you a grandbaby,
MAN: What's wrong with your uterine lining?
We love you, baby,
You got one more family function to miss
before you're out the will,
Don't even show up at the reading,
I'll be at the next one,
I promise, I'm just kidding,
LEX: Love?
Sorry, What time is our flight?
MAN: Seriously, you're hanging out with Lex's friends
over your family? We got to go,
I love you all so much, I will talk to y'all real, real soon,
Okay? I love you, I miss you, Happy birthday, Mom,
ISHA: Wait a minute, Wait a minute,
We gotta go right now,
You got everything? Yeah,
Deodorant? Yeah,
Razor? Uh-huh,
Toothbrush?
Yeah,
Vacation time,
[ENGINE STARTS]
LEX [SINGSONGY]: Let's go,
Okay,,,
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ It's Friday night ♪
♪ And I feel all right ♪
Good job, I did it, I did it,
Two containers? LEX: Yup,
Okay, What should I do with them?
Eat them, JK,
Because I will eat them, Please don't,
That good? Yes, thank you,
MOM: Lexie, I want you to have such a good time
with your college friends,
I want you to relax and I want you to,,,
Oh, have sex? She means sex, Stop,
Thanks, Thank you so much for helping out,
Oh, you're so welcome, And you, my handsome friend,
you gotta do me one favor,
I want a beautiful milk-chocolate baby, okay?
Mom? I have to report you to Human Resources,
Oh, yeah, I'll see you, okay?
Have fun, guys, Please, just go, go, go,
Look at these hips, Ma, I can't even leave you,,,
Babe, There you go, There you go, You're off,
Whoa-dee-doe, Whoa-dee-doe,
BOTH: ♪ Honeys on the street say "Monty, yo, we made it" ♪
♪ It feels so good In my 'hood tonight ♪
♪ The summertime skirts And the guys in Kani ♪
♪ All the gang bangers Forgot about the drive-by ♪
♪ You gotta get your groove on Before you go get paid ♪
♪ So tip up your cups And throw your hands up ♪
♪ And let me hear The party say ♪
♪ I'm kinda buzzed And it's all because ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ South Central does it Like nobody does ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ To all my neighbors You got much flavor ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Let's flip the track Bring the old school back ♪
[JET ENGINE ROARING]
[♪♪♪]
United States does not negotiate with terrorists,
We don't negotiate with terrorists, You're right,
But terrorists are people too,
They were once babies
who suckled at the breasts of their mothers,
They laughed, they cried,
and they dreamt of a brighter future,
Let this man go,
And I promise you,
as president of the United States, you have my word,
Together we will build a better future,
[CRYING]
Secure the cockpit,
It's a solid episode,
Yeah, yeah,
Yeah, the airplane episode,
I remember I won my first Emmy for that one,
No, I know, I saw you were watching your show,
That's my good-luck charm on flights,
Yeah, Well,,, Yeah,
Oh, thank you so much for the first-class flights,
Oh,,, Amazing, Amazing,
I've never been, and now my cake has a seat,
Please, I had the points, It was easy, Yeah,
ROBBIE: You're coming down Punakha Mountain without oxygen,
You have a choice to make,
You can succumb to the mountain
or you can reach out to the gods
and you can do something exceptional,
and right at that moment,
I get a call on the sat phone from Steve Jobs,
What? Oh, I thought he-- Didn't he die?
I think he sensed it was nearing his end,
because he wanted to connect with me in our corporeal forms
before he moved on to the next plane,
and he says to me, he goes:
"Robbie, nobody wants a stylist,
Don't be a stylist, Be a finger,
And from whence the direction of your digit goes,
your destiny will be revealed,"
[BABY FUSSING] MIA: It's okay,
Your mommy's right here, I know,
LEX: I'm trying to write Mia and Peggy's vows right now
and I'm really struggling,
I know, I know,
Who asks someone to write their own vows?
Which I'm super honored, but I'm just--
It feels a little cheese,
You okay, sweetie?
Oh, yeah, I'm good,
[GUNFIRE OVER HEADPHONES]
[FUSSING]
She feels relaxed watching that?
Oh, yeah, Yeah, Yeah, this is,,,
It's a classic,
Good, I'm glad, I'm fine, baby,
Oh, my God, Okay, so Mia?
I saw her filling out paperwork to carry a gun in her luggage,
There's absolutely no way, Yeah,
She is the most liberal person that I know,
She was a part of the Innocence Project,
I think parenting changes some people,
I respect your choices, and I respect your freedom,
You don't think she,,,?
No, No, I mean, that would be crazy,
You know what I was gonna say? Yeah, that she voted for--
I don't think so, No,
No, No, MANI: That is,,,
And I said, "Steve, I'm in Bhutan,
I literally don't have the oxygen
to have this conversation right now,
Can you text it to me?"
And he goes, "I don't actually really know
how to use my phone,"
And so I explain to him:
"Why don't you just dictate
what you wanna say to me into your phone,
and then I can read it on my end?"
Is that where he got the idea from?
Shauna, I just wanted to thank you again
for all your help with the wedding, Yeah,
We probably just would have gone to a courthouse or something,
So this feels pretty cool,
to bring all the friends back together,
You're so welcome, You guys deserve it,
It's truly my pleasure,
WOMAN [OVER TABLET]: You like that? Eat my ass, daddy,
MAN: Yeah, I'm about to go and eat that ass up, girl,
WOMAN: Eat it, come on,
Hey, Levi, You might wanna plug those headphones in,
Hey, Peggy, Or you can go back to your own seat
and use your own headphones,
Levi is exploring,
Totally, yeah,
We're a sex-positive family,
Cool, All right, Um,,,
All right, Enjoy your flight,
I'm gonna go to the bathroom, okay?
MAN: Yeah, take that dick, girl,
WOMAN: Fuck me, daddy, Oh, yeah,
[MOUTHS] What the fuck?
Oh, harder, Yeah,
Take all that dick, girl, Come on,
Oh, thanks, Mani, Oh, this is so fun,
You good? Yeah, I'm good, Thank you,
All right, Well, I have a gift for you,
Ooh,
From a local designer, I got these myself,
Gorgeous, They are beautiful,
Every little touch is amazing,
Mani? Yeah?
Can I just give you these?
For a sec? Yeah, Of course,
Oh, can you be super careful?
I know you're gonna be, but just,,,
Of course, I got it, I got it, Let's just get you,,,
You sure? Really-- Yes,
Oh, I'm joking, I got it,
I got it, Don't be,,,
It's okay, It's okay,
Hi,
Oh, hi, How's it going?
Good, I'm just checking in on you,
Oh, I'm great, Mm?
I'm here, so I'm great, Yeah, How are you?
Great, No, yeah, I'm just-- Yeah, we're really good, Yeah,
I was thinking about it recently, you're,,,
You're the first woman I was ever with, I realized,
And the first person I ever truly opened my heart up to,
I mean, that was the first time I was in love, with you,
Me too, in a lot of ways, Yeah,
That's really the reason I wanted you to write our vows,
No pressure, But I'm honored and I'm excited,
Well, thank you,
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Next,
Oh, I'm up,
Hola, Hola, ¿Que tal?
Perfecto, Muchas gracias,
Have a good day, You too,
So a gun?
Oh, yeah, yeah,
When I was pregnant with Ani,
I just watched a lot of true crime,
Did you know most neighborhoods have a sex offender
who just hasn't committed a crime yet?
Where are they? I don't know, I'm texting,
Hey, Josh and Lindsey's place has terrible reviews,
Look at this,
"Went for a romantic walk with my wife,
celebrating 25 years,"
Congratulations, "Found a body,"
Oh, that took a turn,
He did like the shrimp, though,
[HONKING] [ALL CHEERING]
Good to see you, man, How you doing, man?
Goodness, Hi, Hi, I'm so excited,
Oh, my God, Cutie, There she is,
Oh, you smell fabulous,
You are very sticky,
Oh, my God, I am,
You're not wearing shoes at the airport?
No, I'm wearing shoes,
We've got bags,
Honey, I need a hand with this seat,
It's a little bit of a situation,
Oh, okay, Yeah, I got you,
Hey, Mani, Yeah,
Sorry, would you just grab her for just one second?
Yeah, Yeah, go to Mani,
Filled up the boxes, but there's some bungee cords in there,
What? Where? What's up there?
Hmm?
Honey, It's the airplane,
Can I hold?
Yeah,
[♪♪♪]
Hi,
[♪♪♪]
[THUDS]
What?
Oh, no!
Mani, help me!
Is she okay? Is she okay?
[♪♪♪]
[WHIMPERS]
I need a cranial pediatrician,
A cranial pediatrician, Cranial,
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]
Does it hurt?
SHAUNA: Hey, guess what? The flower crowns were a hit,
I know, Everybody was like, "Shauna, you did it again,"
It's not about credit, you know, it's just-- Yeah,
[SNIFFLES]
Sorry, there is a plug right there,
so if I can just get to it,,,
My cell phone is muerte,
And just make sure they have a vocal stance on pertussis,
Yeah,
What are you doing?
I asked you to get waters,
These are waters,
This is not totally appropriate, Joshua,
Look, it's less waste
and I think some people will appreciate it,
We are in a hospital, not a hammock,
Come here,
Come here, Come on, Come on,
Bring it in, All right, Hey, breathe, That's it,
Do you want a coconut?
No, I'm okay,
Okay, Got them if you want some,
Coconut?
No, those smell awful,
ROBBIE: Feel your heart, okay? Let me just feel your heart,
You're fine, Breathe,
Hey, guys, Do you want a coconut?
No, thank you, Josh,
A little hydration after,,, It's okay,
LINDSEY: Josh? Thanks, buddy, Thank you,
Deeply, deeply inappropriate,
Okay, man,
Yup, Oh, great, Thanks, man,
All right, Mani's here, Mani's gonna take care of you,
He's got it,
Here, We're okay, We're okay,
[EXHALING DEEPLY]
I was holding her and then,,,
And then I heard, like, a buzzing and I--
There was a bee,
I felt,,,
I felt the sting, I felt a sting, it really hurt,
And then I saw a bee and then I looked down,
and I thought, "Where's the baby?" And then,,,
[DOOR OPENS]
Hey, guys, Hey,
She's okay, [SIGHS]
They're gonna keep her overnight for observation just to be safe,
but she is totally fine,
Everything's looking good, Really good,
Yeah, she is very resilient, Babies are,
Is Mia,,,? Do you mind if I just say a very quick hi to,,,
I don't think that's the best idea right now,
Totally, Yeah,
But what you should do is just
go to the hotel, you know, unpack and settle in,
And get the party started and we'll keep you posted, okay?
Peggy, Peggy, you don't want a coconut, do you?
Oh, why, yes, I do, Thank you, I need the electrolytes,
Oh, that's refreshing,
[♪♪♪]
[VEHICLE APPROACHING]
[IN SPANISH]
[PLAYING "LA CUCARACHA"]
[BAND SINGING IN SPANISH]
No cervezas,
[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]
[IN SPANISH]
[IN BROKEN SPANISH] Um,,, In el baby,
Uh,,, In el hospital,
El accidente grande,
To, uh, cabeza,
Thwack,
La cabeza,,,
Thwack,
These need to be refrigerated,
Of course,
JOSH: I'm just gonna say it, LINDSEY: Josh, say it,
I understand that she didn't throw the baby,
No, But I feel like there was something
consciously or subconsciously violent about it,
Was she violent with you?
What, when we were together?
Yes, No,
I mean, consensually a couple times,
but no, not at all,
Overall, very tender,
[SIGHS]
You know, we all just--
We all make mistakes, it could have been me,
It could have been me,
I mean, it wouldn't be, because I would never drop the baby,
but I, uh,,,
What the hell was that?
Hmm?
I went over and I got a chip and I put it in my mouth,
Your eyes said a thousand things,
and there was a very long pause
where you could fill in and say I'm not a baby dropper,
Here is all I'm saying,
You have the potential within you to be a baby dropper,
What? You're impatient with me when I'm sick,
You're sick all the time,
I'm not fucking sick all the time,
You're sick frequently, I'm not frequently sick,
I'm occasionally sick, I am normal person sick,
If I counted the times
you've had sunstroke when we've been on this property--
What, four? I can count them on one hand,
Four? You've had sunstroke four times today,
Fuck you, Lindsey, Fuck you,
We're gonna rename this hotel Sunstroke Josh Hotel,
That's a dumb name for a hotel,
Don't hit me with cilantro,
ROBBIE: You want a micro dose? SHAUNA: Yes,
ROBBIE: Yeah, I thought so,
SHAUNA: Two, please,
Pop, pop, Mm, Thank you, Thank you, baby,
Of course, Do you know what turned me on?
What? When Lexie dropped that baby,,,
Babe,
What? No, no, no,
What turned me on was when I realized
that that's something you would never do,
I would never do that, How could you ever drop a baby?
I don't have it in me, You cradle all the babies,
I do, Mm-hm,
And all I have to do
is take care of everyone else and it's really hard,
Well, it's because you are the light,
No, no, no, no, I mean,,, We could, We could,
We could,
We,,, Should we? Should we drop a baby?
Should we drop a baby in the show?
We could drop a baby in the show,
We could drop a baby in the show, but I'd feel really bad,
I don't want Lex to feel like we stole the story from her,
It's gonna feel very directly related to what happened,
Truth be known, Lex is a writer,
That's true,
And, you know, she understands talent,
she understands the muse,
When the spirit speaks, you have to listen,
Wow, that's true, You're right,
Yeah, And also, she dropped a baby,
This might be cathartic for her, She did,
How many people have dropped babies?
We could say it's public domain,
Yeah, Come on, You know, like "Happy Birthday,"
I love it,
MIA: I'm gonna kill her,
Honey, it was an accident,
It could have happened to me,
I'm gonna smash her head with a concrete block
and drop her body in the ocean,
Do you think that maybe you're just feeling
a little extra overprotective lately?
Clearly I didn't do enough,
Someone dropped our baby on the pavement,
It's just like, with the gun and safety drills,,,
And I saw that you added Joe Rogan
to the Spotify playlist the other day,
What? What does that have to do with anything?
Never mind, okay?
He's a gifted interviewer,
[♪♪♪]
[TOILET FLUSHING]
[SNIFFLES]
They got calamine lotion,
I don't really need that,
[GRUNTS]
It's for your bee sting, Where is it?
It doesn't hurt anymore,
What are you talking about? Let me see,
It doesn't hurt, babe, Let me see,
I don't wanna be touched right now,
Lexie, where is it?
On my arm,
All right, Okay, Obviously,
I,,, Can you just give me a little bit of space?
Don't be mad,
I'm not mad,
Then why are you so far away?
I didn't know I was far away,
Can you just get, like, normal close?
Okay, I gotta take a walk, Mm-hm,
[CLEARS THROAT] The tip of the tongue, the roof of the mouth,
the lips, and the teeth,
The tip of the tongue, the roof of the mouth,
the lips, and the teeth,
What up, no-wanks?
Um,,,
I, uh-- I forced myself to watch three straight hours
of mid-'90s erotica on the plane ride over here,
Hardest 180 minutes of my life,
It is our biological imperative to spread,
not to waste our seed
and to reclaim our masculinity and our manhood,
Men are meant to go out and hunt
and find their mates and spread their seed,
That is why our mantra is "Cum is for courtship,"
Oh, by the way, the "Cum is for courtship" bumper stickers,
they just got printed, like, yesterday,
They are a fucking work of art,
[INSECT BUZZING]
[EXHALES]
[BREATHING DEEPLY] [INSECT BUZZING]
Ma?
I just--
I wanted to ask you a quick question,
Um,,,
Ma, like, how common is it for someone to drop a baby?
You know, baby, it happens,
Sometimes parents are overwhelmed, they're tired,
You know, a little too much on the plate,
they may trip and fall, drop the baby,
maybe the baby rolls off the sofa when they're not looking,
but honestly, baby, that's a white people thing,
Black people don't drop babies,
[♪♪♪]
You feeling it? 'Cause my skin is so sensitive right now,
I know, I do, Oh, my gosh,
I was in a boys' home for a couple years
when I was like, 14, 15,
Guys in there would all,,,
Did what was called a circle jerk,
They said it always feels better
when somebody else whacks their shit,
Hey, Mani, What's up? Get in, Swim to me, man,
Join us, buddy, We've been waiting for you,
SHAUNA: How's our girl? Yeah, How's she doing?
She's just taking a walk, She's doing good,
That's good, Here, Doing all right,
Thank you, Appreciate that,
Oh, that feels good,
Yeah, Doesn't it? [LAUGHS]
I bet, after everything, Mm-hm,
Hey, what happened? LINDSEY: What happened?
What happened?
Oh-- Heh,
It was those flowers you gave us at the airport,
they attracted,,,
a group of bees, Yeah,
She said she saw the biggest bee she's ever seen
and it-it stung her,
She said it was like getting stabbed,
LINDSEY: Oh, my God, Yeah,
Actually, the bigger the bee,
the more docile they are, generally speaking,
And they hurt less,
ROBBIE: What was that, champ? Can you project, please?
Use your diaphragm, Lev,
The bigger the bee,,, Uh-huh,
,,,the more docile they are, generally speaking,
There are some insects, though,
that will, um,,, Yeah,
Oh, no, no, No,
[IN SPANISH]
No, no, No, no,
No, no, I have,,, No, no,
I have,,, Tengo dinero, No, no, No,
No,
Okay, No,
Do you want it back? No, no, no,
[SPITS]
Por favor, Please! No,
[SPITS] Why are you spitting?
[BAND PLAYING "MEXICAN HAT DANCE"]
[SIGHS]
Hey, Oh, Mani, Mani, Mani,
Hey, man, What's up, Rob?
I have too much knowledge, you know?
I'm a dictionary
and these motherfuckers is playing Scrabble,
You know? Mm-hm,
Why are you and I the same color,
but different colors? Huh?
Huh?
Yeah, Where's Shauna?
She's everywhere, man,
[STAMMERS] She's,,, She,,,
Her physical body is asleep,
because she micro-doses and then she passes out,
She'll wake up hungry as fuck and super horny, and she'll,,,
[GASPS]
[GROANING]
Get off of me!
Hey, Josh,
Oh, Mani, Hey,
Hi, Mani, What's up?
I wanna tell you something that I wanna keep between us,
[SHUSHES]
Do you know why some mama wildcats eat their young?
Do you?
Uh-- Hm?
[SHUSHING]
You don't know the answer, you don't open the flaps,
It's because they feel malnourished and threatened,
And they don't feel safe and they don't feel supported,
It's that simple,
I love you and I love Lex,
and so I wanted you to know the key to everything,
Also wanted,,,
[LAUGHS]
[♪♪♪]
[SIGHS]
[SCREAMS]
LEVI: Oh, God, Oh, so sexy,
Oh, wow,
Oh, grab her ass,
Oh, so sexy, Oh, God, Okay, Keep it together,
Okay, It's too much, Okay,
Hey, Lindsey? Josh? Huh?
Say something for the baby, I don't know, my,,,
LINDSEY: For the baby? My mom, my adoptive mom,
is making me make a video about the baby and,,,
Oh, Um,,, Hi, Baby Ani!
Hi, Annie! It's good to,,,
Ani, It's Baby Ani, Yeah,
Baby Ani, we love you, We love you,
so much, and,,,
Get better, Feel it in your bones
when it's the right time to leave the hospital,
Is that it?
Yeah, yeah, that's it, Mani,
Do you wanna say something for the baby that Lex dropped?
Hey, Ani, It's Uncle Mani,
Uh,,, Listen, Auntie Lex and I,
we are always thinking about you,
and we are holding you in our prayers,
We can't wait to see you again,
[LEVI SNORTS]
What?
No, it's just a bold move,
To stand by your female like that
while she's clearly lying to you because she doesn't respect you,
What?
But beta is the new alpha, right?
No, I mean, beta's in, right?
I heard you, It's a joke,
Yeah, I'm being sarcastic,
Uh-huh,
Find that bee sting yet?
No sting, no dick, That's my advice,
Thank you,
[SOFTLY] Oh, Lord, Oh, perfect,
[NORMAL VOICE] Hey,
Lex, Lex, Lex,
Brought you a taco,
Eat up, baby,
Here you go, Here you go, baby,
What are you doing out here, baby?
I got a message that something was wrong with me,
Okay, But I feel better right now,
Good, Good, I'm glad you feel better,
So let's get you inside and get you some clothes,
Where are your clothes?
Behind the-- Behind the gray rock,
[LINDSEY & JOSH PLAYING INSTRUMENTS]
[LINDSEY & JOSH SINGING IN SPANISH]
Oh, it's so pitchy,
It's, like,,, It's very hard to hear,
Mm,,,
[WHOOPING]
I blacked out,
Wow, How,,,
How long did you practice that?
That was our first time,
We just made it up,
Well, good job, Yerp,
You know, we've been feeling very,,,
ahem, selfish,
Selfish lately, Lately,
With us just keeping this property just to ourselves,
Hm, Yeah, JOSH: Yeah,
It's funny, we've just begun discussing
the possibility of bringing on
some likeminded investors who are in,,,
In the family,
Yeah, Somebody who's in spiritual alignment
with our mission here,
Wow,
I'm sure you'll find that,
LEVI: Hey, LINDSEY: Hey, guys,
JOSH: Hey, guys,
You guys doing okay?
We're good,
That didn't look right,
Sand flea bites hurt really bad, Yeah?
Yeah,
But they're, like, not as bad as the bee sting,
That was, like, the worst pain of my life, so,,,
I don't think I'm allergic or anything,
[WINCES] Ow!
Ooh, I'm sorry, baby,
It's okay,
Okay, are we good? Yeah, We're good,
[SIGHS]
You're gonna use my toothbrush?
[WATER RUNNING]
Is that okay? Yeah,
Are you sure?
Yeah,
It's just funny,,,
because I remember reminding you about packing your toothbrush,
Oh, yeah, Yeah,
You did, Sorry,
[SIGHS] Yeah,
[SPITS]
You want a turn?
[PHONE CHIMES, BUZZES]
[♪♪♪]
Guess who's ovulating?
Lucky you, Yeah,
Wake up, little guy, Big guy,
Wake up,
Oh, yeah,
Does that feel good? Get it to-- You're not really like,,,
Do you wanna try doggy or something?
Do it until it get hard,
Stop saying that, Oh, yeah,
Okay, Yeah,
Yeah,
Do you feel it?
Yeah,
How about now?
Yeah, You got this,
Put a baby in me, baby, Yeah,
Oh, yeah, Let's make some twins,
Oh, yeah, Let's make some triplets,
I'mma make them identical,
Knock me up,
It's getting me hard, baby,
Yeah,
It's getting me hard,
Put it in,
I'm losing it, Losing it,
You want a blow job?
Yeah, Can you suck it? Little blowie?
Can you suck it? Thank you, This has never happened before,
LEX [INDISTINCTLY]:
Hey, schmoog,
Hey,
Here I come,
Coming for you, The love monster,
[CHUCKLES]
You don't have to feel bad, It's so not a big deal,
And I know I was kind of crazy last night,
I feel so much better now,
and you don't have to worry about me anymore, okay?
And just relax, Gonna party,
♪ Par-tay! ♪
We're gonna,,, ♪ Par-tay! ♪
[LAUGHS] There's the laugh,
It's gonna be so fun,
Fuck you,
Love you, You're stupid,
JOSH: This is tocino de betabel,
Which is a beetroot bacon
that we make here on the property,
That's good, Thank you,
And I don't know if you've had these before,
but these are huevos de tortuga,
a sea turtle egg that we forage here on the property,
SHAUNA: Those are endangered, I'm pretty sure,
For the new website, Oh, yeah,
That's great,
Can you ask her to delete that, please?
Okay, Calm down, Yeah, of course,
Oh, that's,,, Hey, Lindsey? Hm?
The photo you just took?
We feel uncomfortable with things like that
because of the geolocation,,, Yeah,
We've had a lot of people,,, It's a beautiful shot,
You wanna see it, or,,,?
ROBBIE: No, Guys, it's just for--
It's our friends,
Oh, yes! It's just, you know,,, The website,
This is beautiful,,, I'll delete it,
Thanks, You're the best,
No problem, no problem, Okay, great,
Good vibes only, [SHUTTER CLICKS]
Lindsey, Hm?
Can you delete that photo too?
It was mostly the-- Sounded like you took another,
The idea was,,, It was mostly the food,
What I'm gonna need you to do,,,
I deleted it, Lindsey?
Can you just go into your recently deleted folder
and delete all?
All the way, I need you to clear it,
I say this from the bottom of my heart,
are you fucking kidding me?
Lindsey,,, All right, I'll do it,
Babe, babe, babe, I'm just getting upset,
We put a nice,,, These are--
It's everybody's vacation, SHAUNA: Exactly,
We want everyone to feel comfortable, So there we go,
You're awesome, You could be-- Hey, guys,
MANI: Yo! Hi, Mani,
ROBBIE: Be supportive,
Guys, welcome, Welcome, friends, Thanks,
Look at you, you look,,, You look,
LINDSEY: Wow, Thanks,
I know you guys all saw me last night, I'm so embarrassed,
A little cuckoo, SHAUNA: We did, but,,,
[ALL CHUCKLE]
No, we just,,,
To be completely honest, I don't even,,,
It's okay, Um,,,
I was really nervous about facing all of you,
Um,,,
And so I kind of just wanted to go in the ocean and just,,,
you know, be gone forever, sort of,
Please don't do that to yourself,
We love you so much, So much, LEX: I love you guys,
And I just wanna say that you're always there for me,
Always, Always,
And I thank you, Seriously,
I'm here for you, baby, Okay?
How are you doing, buddy? MANI: I'm good,
She's good, I'm good, So,,,
So amazing,
We don't really ask men how they're doing enough,
True, Well, it's a societal thing,
A big night for everybody, Yeah,
It was a weird day, ALL: Yes,
Right? Like, was it weird? We can all agree,
All right, It was weird, I'm glad someone said it,
It was fucking weird,
[ALL LAUGH]
So that's just-- That's how I feel,
I'll also say this, Like, you know,
when we got off the plane,,,
I was so excited to be here,
And I remember holding the baby and feeling,,,
[VOICE BREAKING] Feeling really, like, ready to be a dad,
LINDSEY: Aw,,,
SHAUNA: Yes,
It felt really good, man,
ROBBIE: Oh!
LINDSEY: Look who it is! [ALL CLAPPING, CHEERING]
It's all your friends, ROBBIE: Look at her hat,
Oh, my God, Look at her hat, Look at her amazing hat,
This is her fancy new hat
that she has to wear for a little while,
Three months, Three months,
Okay, SHAUNA: That's a long time,
But she's okay? She's okay,
I'm really sorry, PEGGY: It's okay,
Accidents happen, and everything is fine,
Do you wanna go say hi to Auntie Lex?
I don't want you to feel like you have to do that because,,,
No, she's okay, You're safe, You're safe, It's okay,
Yes, Yes, Yup,
It's okay,
LEX: Hi, honey,
I'm so sorry,
I love you,
Can I give you a kiss? Is that okay? Can I give you a kiss?
PEGGY: Right on the little helmet,
Can I give you a little kiss?
[BELCHES]
Okay, All right, Back to Mama,
Back to Mama, Good job, Okay,
Sorry, Yeah, I--
We haven't eaten yet and I guess that was like a,,,
hungry burp,
[♪♪♪]
ROBBIE: I don't know where I come up with ideas like this,
but I definitely have learned to get out of their way
when they come into the dome,
The restaurant is called Starved,
What we do, we lock you in a dark room for 48 hours, right?
No light, no food, no water, It's wet,
I'd take your clothes if I could, but that'd be illegal,
Actually surprised, 'cause this is
kind of new for you and your natural lifestyle,
Oh, well, I do dabble sometimes,
but just with plant drugs, so,,,
I let you out,
And I give you one single red ripe tomato,
Ah,
One tomato,
That's it?
Exactly,
Yeah, this is a,,, What is it? Cacao plant?
Is that what it is?
Oh, that's chocolate,
Oh, I definitely-- I can't have chocolate,
That's very bad for me,
So this is coco, from Colombia,
Okay,
I'm so happy we found love, because--
Man, I don't know about you, Josh,
but when Lex and I broke up, I was--
I mean,,, Fucking destroyed,
Devastated, Fucking destroyed,
And the chemical connection we had was out of this world,
She said to me, and, you know, we've talked about this,
She said that, sexually, she'd never been satisfied by anyone
the way that, you know, I had, but,,,
I think she said that to everybody,
Best sex of my life,
Come here,
You're great, I miss you, [LAUGHS]
I miss you too, Yeah,
You know, you always think
you're gonna be one of those moms,
"No, everything's gonna be the same,
I'm just gonna have this new person in my life," But no,
No, Different place, The world is a different place,
My eyes have been opened,
Yes, I mean, before I adopted Levi,
I was so selfish, you know?
Yeah, I know,
And now, I mean,
everything I do is for everybody else,
Sure, So I get it,
Are you sure you're actually wanting to have a baby?
Yes,
Okay, Yes, Yeah,
That's very good, 'cause, you know, it's like suicide,
What?
Well, you know, things you can't undo in your life,
Okay, Having a baby, committing suicide,
renouncing your US citizenship for a dream,
So you're sure? I'm sure, Yeah,
Okay, Okay, Why do you keep--? Yes,
I don't know, There's an energy I want multiple,
I'm getting that's just a little resistant,
MIA: There was this one case, Gerard Watkins,
It was an attempted robbery,
He killed a guy in a convenience store and it was just--
I was like, "Yeah, but does he deserve to die for that?"
And, you know, we fought for him,
He got a lighter sentence,
He's still around,
And then I was like, "Wait a second, A man was murdered,
He has a mom, He was once a baby in that mom's arms,"
[SCOFFS] Gerard should've died,
And that man's mom should have watched him die,
and she should have decided how painful it gets to be,
Like, you know that death rattle they talk about?
She should have gotten to feel the death rattle,
My husband will never not be sweating,
He's a little moist, yeah,
We moved to an island,
and now he's just forever dripping,
[LAUGHS] Yeah, And you laugh, but honestly,
we're having problems sexually because of it,
I don't know what it is down here,
If it's the heat,
or if it's the stress of running a hospitality business, or,,,
if it's just something she's been eating,
But it's gotten worse,,,
and worse and worse, and now it's really like,,,
It's as if we're about to be intimate
and my husband's just been through a carwash,
but his body is the car,
And I just,,,
For me, my arousal goes to an all-time low,
And it's funny because he's the wettest he's ever been
and I couldn't be drier,
I just miss the old smell of my wife's vagina,
I hate my life,
What? I just--
I wish sometimes that I could just be in the middle of a mall,
I wanna go to the movies and I wanna watch a Marvel movie,
And I wanna root for the,,,
The man who flies who's red, The,,,
Superman, I wanna root for Superman,
Yeah, no, Yeah, And wear deodorant or,,,
Well, I wear deodorant,
Yes, No, I know,
And I love my deodorant,
I would never put aluminum on my body,
No, no, no, no, no,
I make it with this arrowroot powder and a hint of mint,
Oh,,, And there's a coconut base,,,
I can make you some, if you'd like,
Yes, Thank you,
JOSH: It smells so bad,
Have you ever tried durian fruit?
All right, It's experimental, but I know it does work,
Try turmeric paste,
You're gonna have to apply it directly to the labia,
Okay, Okay, All right, We're done,
I don't wanna have this conversation anymore,
It makes me uncomfortable,
So I would appreciate it if we
wouldn't talk about our wives' vaginas,
Please? Thank you,
I'm gonna be honest with you, Josh, like,,,
Women at an early age are taught
to be ashamed of their vaginas,
so it kind of felt like you were doing some misogynistic attack,
How would you like if your wife made fun of your smelly dick?
If you had a smelly dick, How would it make you feel?
Would it make you feel bad? It'd make you feel bad?
Don't touch me, man!
You, the idea for your restaurant is morally offensive,
Move,
Fuck, What the fuck?
LEX: Can I sit here?
I'm sorry,
I'm so sorry,
I don't even have the words, really, to,,,
say how sorry that I am,
But I'm totally fine if you don't want me to write the vows,
or even come to the ceremony,
Ah!
[SHUSHING]
Lex? Lex? I love you, I love you,
Lex, I love you,
And one day you're gonna have your own beautiful baby,
You are,
I know it, I know these things,
And I'm gonna be the godmother, because who else would it be?
And you have to write the vows,
Who else is gonna write the vows?
Me? Yeah,
You're gonna write the vows,
'cause you can't let me down again,
You can't cross Mia twice,
And I love you, I do, But,,, I love you,
I miss what we had physically,
I know, I know, I see it in your eyes,
But, Lex, I'm getting married,
Oh,,, I'm getting married,
So you're gonna write the vows,
and we're gonna have those memories forever,
Okay? Yeah,
Mia, where's the gun?
Don't worry about the gun, The gun is safe,
I put the gun--
The gun knows where it is, It's safe,
It's so pretty,
Yeah,
You okay?
I'm okay, I'm okay, I'm fine,
Okay, But I'm just--
I don't want people to keep asking me if I'm okay, I'm,,,
Sorry,
I just don't wanna be on this boat anymore,
I wanna go home, I don't wanna be with these people,
Okay, Okay, I'm sorry,
I think that it's fine,
I don't think anyone will care if we head back now,
You can stay, I'll be fine,
I'm just gonna swim,
What?
I'm gonna swim,
I think that the shore
is probably much farther away than it looks,
and you're not a super strong swimmer, so,,,
Don't do it,
Be careful!
What's he doing?
He just wanted to swim,
LEVI: Hi,
Hey, bud, You didn't go on the boat?
No, I'm on Accutane, so I can't, really,
Can I ask you a question? Yeah,
Of course, Sure, Yeah, What's going on?
So you're a lesbian?
I am, yes,
You're not attracted to men whatsoever?
You're not bi? I am-- Nope,
I am only interested in women,
I'm only interested in Mia, hence the wedding,
Congratulations, Thank you, Thanks,
And you're a doctor, right?
I am, I'm an Ob-Gyn,
You're a gynecologist?
Mm-hm, Yeah, Good,
That's good, 'Cause this is medical,
It's not a sexual thing, It's a medical thing,
Sure, Yeah, It's medical,
What's going on?
So medically speaking,,,
Mm-hm? Um,,,
how long can the teenage penis endure without a release?
Hm,,,
Well,,,
Damn it,
Wow,
You're back,
[MANI PANTING]
That took so long, Um,,,
I am freaking out right now
because I still have to do the cake,
and I thought it was gonna be for the wedding,
but it's a sunrise wedding and they actually want it
for the rehearsal dinner,
because they don't like the idea of cake for breakfast,
which I do, so--
But that's okay, I'm just kind of rushing around,
Um,,, And I finished the vows,
If you wouldn't mind reading them, that'd be good,
Well, yeah, I swam for three hours,
I know, You're so impressive, babe,
And I watched you, the little orange dot,
I was like, "Is he okay?"
But I watched to make sure you were,
No, you didn't,
Yeah, I did,
[SCOFFS]
[LAUGHING]
No, you didn't,
Yeah, I did, babe, What's going on with you?
Okay, Things have been-- You're very dirty,
A little intense lately, right?
And I just wanna make sure that you're okay,
Can I kiss you?
Don't be sad,
So if you wanna just rest and,,,
I have to go do the cake, I'm so sorry,
But can we talk about--? I really do wanna talk about it,
Okay, I love you, I'm sorry,
And please don't-- Sorry,
You're gonna hate me, Please don't sit on the bed,
But I love you,
I'll see you soon,
Sorry, Love you,
Oh, my God, Oh, my God, Hi,
Hi, Lex, What's going on?
Circle of life,
Sorry?
Circle of life!
"Use the sawdust to cover what you give
and we'll give it back to you in our vegetable garden,"
No, thank you,
That's a no,
That's a hard fucking no,
MOM [OVER CHAT]: Oh, sweetheart, Are you having doubts?
I don't know, I'm just wondering, really,
Well, we didn't know right away,
It took us a little while to figure it out,
But then, at some point,
I think my body told me I was ready,
Did you ever feel, like,
something anti-that in your body?
Uh, no, no, I think I felt that if I didn't have a baby,
it would be like taking an ax
and chopping down the family tree,
You know, you have to think of all the people
who came before us,
who, you know, had to survive just to get to this moment,
Potato famine, the Oregon Trail,
your grandfather storming the beaches
at Normandy under gunfire,
And, you know, if that doesn't move you,
then, darling, I think you need
to think about what's fair to Mani,
ROBBIE: Two, three, four,
[LEVI PLAYING GUITAR]
[ROBBIE VOCALIZING]
Hey,
♪ You've got the look Of a wild one ♪
♪ I'm one who cannot be tamed ♪
♪ We're both alone On an island ♪
♪ With everybody the same ♪
♪ And every planet Has its moon ♪
♪ Every ocean has its shore ♪
♪ Every child grows In the mood ♪
♪ Every room opens a door ♪
♪ It goes round and round And round and round ♪
♪ Round and round And round and round ♪
Everyone,
♪ Round and round And round and round ♪
ALL: ♪ Round and round And round and round ♪
♪ We go round and round And round and round ♪
ROBBIE: ♪ Round and round and round ♪
Guitar solo,
Are we still doing our thing?
Mm-hm,
Do you wanna practice our lines?
No,
You're being very cold with me, Is there a reason?
Wow, Wow,
[ALL CHEERING]
Oh, yeah,
Thank you, Mia,
We're here to share our hearts with you
as you share your hearts with each other,
And in order to do that tonight, all we're gonna ask of you
is to pick up the love gourd here, uh,,,
which was gifted to me by Russell Brand in 2009,
and once held the ashes of one of the women
from the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory,
Um,,,
The popular tragedy of the mid-1920s,
So now, without further ado,
I'm gonna introduce the gal who brought us all here,
to perform some excerpts from her one-woman show,
Number One on the Call Sheet,
Shauna Alessandra Mahogany Renee Roberts,
[EXHALES]
It's 6 a,m, and my assistant calls,
The driver's been downstairs for nearly an hour
and I have cold cream on my face
and not an ounce of espresso in my body,
What do I do? I rush down those stairs
because I'm a professional, A what?
P-R-O-fessional, I was just wondering,
do you remember when you used to babysit me
and then we would eat a lot of mac and cheese?
Yeah, We ate a lot of mac and cheese,
Cool, Yeah, Me too, I remember,
SHAUNA: But I still can't perspire in any way because
the paparazzi is lurking in the bushes,
Or is that a homeless man? You can never know,
I knew it was gonna be a hard day
when my favorite AD got moved to the second unit,
I didn't know how hard it was gonna be
until that bitch, Jerry, knocked on my trailer door,
Without my heart, the show cannot go on!
People always tell me:
"Shauna, you're the reason
Kamala Harris made it to the White House,"
I don't know about that, but I did play the president
for nine Emmy award-winning seasons,
And they say you cannot be it unless you see it,
And she did see it, She sent me an e-mail,
So now, in this moment,
bear witness to the rebirth of Shauna Roberts,
[SCREAMS, LAUGHS]
[ROBBIE EXCLAIMING]
ROBBIE: I don't know how I'm gonna follow that,
I wanna welcome our gracious hosts here tonight
to say some lovely words and share in the celebration,
Please welcome to the gourd
Joshua and Lindsey,
Let's do it,
Love you both,
Love you, Thank you, brother,
And thank you, sister,
Now, tonight, we have a question for all of you,
Are you tired of this? Are you tired of all of this?
Honk, Honk, honk,
Taxi cab, Taxi cab, Taxi, Taxi cab,
Ring, ring, Cell phones,
Cell phones everywhere, Cell phones,
Cell phones everywhere,
You're supposed to pick up everywhere,
You're working around the clock, It's 3:00, It's 4:00,
It's 5, It's 6, It's 11, 12, It's 10, it's 11,
And I don't know where the day went by,
Every hour, you're working,
We have the solution, We have the solution for you,
Unlimited fresh mangoes,
LEVI: Lex? LEX: Yeah?
So back when you babysat me
and then we were eating the mac and cheese,
do you remember the time when we were watching Space Jam?
Like, the original Space Jam?
And then I accidentally spilled
the whole bowl of noodles on my lap
and you had to wipe them off?
I'm not sure, I don't know,
I can fall asleep at any moment here, Anytime,
If I concentrate hard enough,
So we have,,, Palapas,
Palapa, palapa, palapa, palapa, palapa, palapa, palapa, palapa,
And then you walk down to the beach,
And this could be you, in your birthday suit,
naked on your own private beach,
When, at the time that you were wiping the cheesy noodles
off of my crotch,,,
I mean, do you remember
what was going through your head in that moment?
I don't know,
JOSH: ,,,if you wanted to be a fuller part of our family,
What?
Sole ownership,
that's for someone who wants the whole pizza pie,
The whole pizza pie by themselves,
I hate this, It's okay,
It's not okay, Are you seeing this?
And then there's fractional,,, Fractional ownership,
And that's for someone who says, "I just want a slice,"
It's just a little intense, and,,,
What? What? Everybody's just asking me,,,
You're not sharing in a shared experience,
What is everyone asking you? If you're a Republican,
LINDSEY: So you'll notice here-- ROBBIE: All right, Hey,
Your invest--
As the money goes up,,, As the money,,,
Stress goes down,
Lex, Lex?
Yeah?
Can you just tell me to brush my teeth and go to bed?
Does anybody else think that we're embarrassing ourselves?
I need the love gourd because,,,
Please? Just like you used to do when you babysat me,
JOSH: ,,,of love and safety, LINDSEY: We're sharing our time,
You know what? I'm gonna need the fucking love--
Oh, really? Really? Give me-- Ah!
You know what? Brush your teeth and go to bed,
[MOANING]
LINDSEY: My armpits, Goddamn it! ROBBIE: I'm sorry, I,,,
Look, I'm sorry you feel that way, Josh,
You tell your wife to get the fuck away from me
or I'm gonna chop her in the throat, You back up!
Hey, You really fucked this up,
I love you, but this is all your fault,
so I'm gonna need you to take this gourd and fix it, okay?
Okay, Just,,,
Mani?
[BOTH HUMMING NOTES]
♪ Get the party groovin' ♪
[BOTH VOCALIZING]
♪ Get the party groovin' ♪
♪ Time to say I do, girls Peg and Mia for life ♪
♪ They'll become two wives ♪
♪ The party's Up near the riptide ♪
♪ Spread icing on the big cake Call my homies up ♪
♪ Wedding for my best friends Gotta wish 'em luck ♪
♪ So much love that it's crazy ♪
♪ Growing old together Getting fat and lazy ♪
♪ Feels so good Like it should ♪
♪ Tonight ♪
♪ What's mine is yours And yours is mine ♪
♪ I'mma love you like a dad Loves a good high-five ♪
♪ I love you till the end, babe Gonna see you age ♪
♪ Raise up ♪ ♪ A cup ♪
♪ Wanna wish you luck ♪
♪ Now let me hear The lezzies say ♪
♪ So in love And it's all because ♪
♪ Time to say "I do," girls ♪
♪ She loves you, she loves you ♪ ♪ Like nobody does ♪
♪ Nobody does Nobody does ♪
♪ You guys are marrying ♪
♪ Mani, what's up? ♪
[SCREAMING]
[GASPS]
Oh, my God,
[SCOFFS] I have an announcement,
I'm a libertarian, There, You happy?
But what about roads, and bridges, and stuff?
Fine, Shauna, I've been faking my orgasms,
I know,
I'm in,
JOSH: You're what?
I'm in, I love the vision,
The stuff about escaping technology,
it really spoke to me,
Do you accept Dogecoin?
Deal,
What's a Dogecoin?
Hey, Mani? Go away,
I'm in heels, babe,
Hey, can you stop?
Mani,
Why won't you talk to me?
Mani, What?
Did you do this on purpose?
Do what on purpose?
The only thing I've ever cared about
was starting a family together,
and you went and dropped it on the fucking concrete,
[SIGHS]
There was a bee that was--
Shut the fuck up about the bee,
I-- Yeah, I,,,
I get that, but I just need to tell you this,
'cause you don't really know the whole thing,
and you're gonna hate me after,
but I just have to tell you 'cause it's the truth,
Um, the bee or whatever the fuck it was
that was coming towards me scared me,
And I went to swat it away,
and when I did I forgot that I was holding the baby,
It didn't even sting me, I was just scared,
[SNIFFLES]
I dropped her to protect myself,
So that's the kind of person I am,
That was not--
That's not who you are,
I just don't think I can have a baby right now,
I don't think-- I don't think--
I don't know that I can have a baby ever,
You'd be a great father,
And you deserve that chance,
And if that's what you need,,,
I don't know that we can be together,
[SIGHING]
[♪♪♪]
Every decision, every choice,,,
that we've ever made in our lives
has brought us to this perfect,
momentous, joyous moment,
We're lucky, we're blessed,
to witness the commitment of Peggy and Mia,
Lex has written vows for Peggy and Mia to recite,
which we'll do now,
Our time together on this Earth is short,
MIA: Our time together on this Earth is short,
PEGGY: But when I'm with you,
I catch a glimpse of the infinite, and I am in awe,
MIA: But when I'm with you,
I catch a glimpse of the infinite,
and I am in awe,
PEGGY: You are my best friend,
my ally, my family,
MIA: You are my best friend, my ally, my family,
PEGGY: I vow to hold your heart sacred
and to treat it with care,
MIA: I vow to hold your heart sacred
and to treat it with care,
PEGGY: I vow to forgive your faults
and to be worthy of your forgiveness,
MIA: I vow to forgive your faults
and to be worthy of your forgiveness,
PEGGY: I vow to see you and to see our love every day
with fresh eyes,
MIA: I vow to see you and to see our love
every day with fresh eyes,
PEGGY: I vow to be your partner here on Earth,,,
and to look for you in whatever form comes after,
MIA: I vow to be your partner here on Earth,
and to look for you in whatever form comes after,
PEGGY: And should it turn out that after is only darkness,,,
then I vow that this was worth it,
I say that this was all worth it,
It was worth it,
All of it,
[♪♪♪]
And now, by the power vested in me
by the Universal Life Church,
I now pronounce you wife and wife, partners for life,
You may kiss the bride, [LAUGHING]
ROBBIE: Yes!
[CHEERING]
Excuse me,
Okay, Ready? Mommy has a gun,
And boom!
Okay,
[CHEERING, LAUGHING]
All right, All right, Take it, Take it,
[MAN WHISTLES]
MAN: ¿Qué pasa?
[IN SPANISH]
Oh, I'm fine,
My wife left me,
[IN SPANISH]
[MAN EXCLAIMS]
MAN:
[IN ENGLISH] Here,
Aquí,
Si,
Yeah, Si,
Oh,
[EXCLAIMS]
Si,
[♪♪♪]
Yeah, we broke up,
[EXCLAIMS]
Yeah, Sometimes things aren't meant to be, so,,,
[SPEAKING SPANISH]
Yeah, I like my peppers hot,
[CHEERING]
Okay, Let's do it, To family,
MANI: I know something's missing,
I just don't know what it is,
I don't mind being there for Lex,
I never minded that, That's our thing,
When we had to move to L,A, when her dad died,
I was right there,
God, like, loving that woman is the easiest thing
that I've ever done,
So why is it so hard now?
I do have a big heart,
Grande,
Wow! Mm-hm,
Yeah, I got you,
[CHIRPING]
MANI: I'm really gonna miss you guys,
Thank you so much for having me,
Mmm!
Thank you,
Thank you very much,
Thank you, Thank you very much,
Yes, sir, Hey, come here, man,
Thank you, Appreciate that, Abuela,
Thank you, Thank you, Appreciate that so much,
Thank you,
I'm gonna miss your cooking, Thank you,
Appreciate that, Thank you, [PHONE CHIMES]
Hold on, Sorry,
Oh, wow, I gotta go, Thank you, all,
You all changed my life, I love you,
Bye!
MOM [OVER VOICEMAIL]: Mani, Baby, Okay, Look, I've thought a lot about it,
and I will confess, I did drop you, Once, Maybe twice,
Two times max,
Is this why you moved so far away from family?
You're gonna be late, guys,
Plane's gonna leave, We gotta go,
I'm not leaving without him,
you can go, MANI: Lex!
What the fuck?
Baby,
Shauna, can you fuck off so I can talk to my wife?
Thank you, Sure,
As a matter of fact, can you all fuck off?
Okay, Come on,
I was up all night waiting for you,
I almost called the police,
You weren't picking up your fucking phone,
Mm-hm, Mm-hm, Yeah,
Okay, There's so much that I need to-- Fuck off!
What did you wanna tell me? Lex,,,
I,,,
hate Los Angeles,
And I know you named your bakery Carbs ironically,
but I don't wanna live in a city that thinks that's funny,
I wanna go back to Brooklyn,
And I love you, but you're not enough,
I mean, it's too much pressure,
And what I'm trying to say is I wanna see my family
and I wanna be around my family,
That's what I'm missing,
It was foolish of me to expect you
to be everything in my life,,,
because I can't be everything in your life,
However, we can be the most important thing,
That's it? Is that it?
I can do that, I like New York, I can--
I can open up a bakery there,
It doesn't need to be an ironic name,
But what about kids?
'Cause I can't guarantee that,
And if you need them, then you shouldn't--
You shouldn't be with me,
That is okay, A baby isn't the only way to have a family,
I love you,
I missed you so much, I love you,
I missed you so much, I missed you too,
Your boobs got bigger, [SCOFFS] You wish,
I'm just bloated because of the tacos,
You've got taco boobs?
Is that what happens when you eat tacos?
Oh! [VOMITS]
It's okay, It's okay, babe,
I'm sorry, No, no, no,
♪ This is how we do it ♪
DOULA: Okay,
We're gonna do one big push,
Let it come,
[GROANING]
Good, Good, Oh, my God,
You know, she's a little lazy, so she's,,,
You gotta give her a little,,,
Okay, We love you, We do, We love you,
Breathe, And I love you,
You're so sweet,
Okay, breathe,
LEX: No, no, no, no, Here it comes,
One more big push,
[SCREAMS]
[WATER BUBBLES]
Did I do it? Is the baby here? Honey?
It's just poop,
It's just poop, baby,
[BOTH BREATHING DEEPLY]
♪ I'm kinda buzzed And it's all because ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Oh, South Central does it Like nobody does ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ To all my neighbors You got much flavor ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Let's flip the track Bring the old school back ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ All hands are in the air ♪
♪ And wave them From here to there ♪
♪ If you're an OG mack Or a wanna-be player ♪
♪ You see, the hood's Been good to me ♪
♪ Ever since I was A lower case G ♪
♪ But now I'm a big G ♪
♪ The girls see I got the money ♪
♪ Hundred dollar bills, y'all ♪
♪ If you were from Where I'm from ♪
♪ Then you would know ♪
♪ That I gotta get mine In a big black truck ♪
♪ You can get yours In a '64 ♪
♪ Whatever it is The party's underway ♪
♪ So tip up your cup And throw your hands up ♪
♪ And let me hear The party say ♪
♪ I'm kinda buzzed And it's all because ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Oh, South Central does it Like nobody does ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ To all my neighbors You got much flavor ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Man, I'll never gonna wack On an old school track now ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪
♪ And I'm kinda buzzed It's all because ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ South Central does it Like nobody does ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪ ♪ Nobody does ♪
♪ YNV, SCC ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪ ♪ All my homies ♪
♪ I'll never come wack On an old school track ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪ ♪ Check it out ♪
♪ Once upon a time in '94 ♪
♪ Montell made no money And life sure was slow ♪
♪ And all they said Was 6'8" he stood ♪
♪ And people thought the music That he made was good ♪
♪ There lived a DJ And Paul was his name ♪
♪ He came up to Monty This is what he said: ♪
♪ "You and OG Are gonna make some cash ♪
♪ Sell a million records And we're making the dash" ♪
♪ Oh, I'm buzzing because ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ South Central does it Like nobody does ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪ ♪ Nobody does ♪
♪ To all my neighbors You got much flavor ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ I'll never come wack On an old school track now ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪
♪ And I'm kinda buzzed It's all because ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ South Central does it like No, no, no ♪
♪ No, yeah ♪ ♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Oh, it's party time ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ And I'm straight up Coming from the west side ♪
♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Oh, she's got the flavor ♪
♪ Yeah ♪ ♪ This is how we do it ♪
♪ Oh, she's got the flavor ♪
♪ Yeah ♪ ♪ This is how we do it ♪
[ANI WHINES]