SPORTING ROMA HAS BEEN A FOOTBALL TEAM OF THE SUBURBS OF ROME FOR MANY YEARS,
IN ITS WHOLE HISTORY, IT'S NEVER WON A FUCKING THING,
NETFLIX PRESENTS
Come on! Press him!
Press him too! Go long!
Change sides, Danie!
Antonio! Look here!
Go, Antonio! Hurry! Run along the side!
Pass it to the middle!
No! Pass it sooner!
Come on, Anto, go!
Ram him!
Well done!
Spread out!
Keep going, Antonio! Go!
Go! No! He's in the middle!
Antonio! Wake up!
You all need to pass that ball!
How many times do I have to tell you? Two to three touches at most!
-Hey, -Yes?
How long?
Ten minutes,
Where the fuck are they?
-Come on! -Wait for me!
Assholes! I'll kill you!
Ollellè, ollallà, Vincent Candela!
Tackle! From the wing! Go!
Come on, Anto, go!
Come on!
Ref, Foul!
No, Ref!
Ref! Go to hell!
Fuck off!
You didn't see that? How much do they get paid?
Pass the ball,
Go on!
Break him, Daniele! Go for the legs!
Well deserved!
What? Are you trying to kill him?
-Hey, Ref! That's a foul! -You have to throw him out!
Hey! He's hurt! Go,
Hey, you can't do that!
Suck it, you little shit!
Throw him out!
He dived! He faked it! Let me go!
Go fuck yourself! Look at this asshole!
Sorry, what did you say? I didn't catch that,
Look at this bitch!
What did you say to me? Come say that to my face!
Fuck off!
No, you fuck off!
-Mr, President, -What?
-Aren't you watching the game? -No, I'd rather not,
Hey, idiot, you're going to get beaten up!
Honey, don't worry, Just watch the game,
Chicco and Spillo Jumping like two cats on a saddle
They sprint out, full throttle Motherfuckers, you'll never catch us
Make sure not to put any bacon in it as you people do in the north,
That's a different thing, It changes the flavor,
The guanciale, instead, comes from the snout of the pig,
It's a more noble fat,
The flavor is delicate,
It's the key ingredient, okay?
No question about it, It's that or nothing,
Back in the day,
we would spread a big spoonful of pig fat on the bottom of the pan,
but nobody does it anymore,
Guanciale is more than enough, so nothing sticks,
Add a bit of red chili pepper, Not too hot,
Lower the flame
and let it pan-fry
until the guanciale browns nicely,
If you get it wrong, your lard will end up boiled,
or worse, burned,
You might ask, "When is the right moment?" I cannot be the one to tell you!
You have to feel it,
Stop the browning by throwing the tomatoes in the pan,
Drain the spaghetti, cooked al dente, What did I say?
I said spaghetti, Did I say bucatini?
No, I said spaghetti,
Bucatini is a Roman version, They have jack shit to do with it,
Amatrice is the city of spaghetti,
Don't use any oil like you do in the north!
Why the fuck would you put oil in it? Oil is acid,
It alters the flavor,
Toss them in the pan with tomatoes,
and in the meantime add the pecorino cheese,
And then serve it on a plate,
Add a little more pecorino at the end as a finishing touch,,,
and voilà!
This is spaghetti amatriciana,
No garlic,
no oil,
no onion,
How much is it?
No idea,
Ask him,
Here, eat this shit!
-Thank you, -Thanks,
-Goodbye, thank you, -Cheers,
TASTY SANDWICHES
What did he say?
I don't know, but he was very funny,
Go to hell, I hope you choke on it!
What? You knew?
It was pretty clear, wasn't it?
Clear to whom?
Didn't you hear them when they ordered?
I thought they were from Milan,
Oh, fuck off, Umberto! Come on, "Milan"?
Clean the grill and stop talking shit,
Oh, now I'm the one who's talking…
Coming up!
That's it! Come on, from the start!
Go!
-Tarzan! -In the middle! As it is!
That's it, well done! Go!
No! Shit!
Oh, for fuck's sake!
My god, it's like he has two left feet,
Hello?
What's the score?
We're losing, 2-0,
And Antonio?
Antonio is nervous, He's not playing well,
Poor thing, This game meant a lot to him,
-Go, Anto! -Come on, guys!
Go, Anto!
Fucking pass it, Are you blind?
-Paolo? -No, fuck!
Paolo, did you take Giulletta to the game?
Paolo, I told you to leave her at your sister's!
-Ref! You bastard! -Ref!
-Have you seen what he did? -Hey, that's a foul!
She didn't want to go to my sister's, Gianna,
She just didn't want to, She wanted to come with me,
-To the game? -Yes,
But today is Priscilla's First Communion,
Please, tell me that you let her know, Paolo,
Please be seated,
Dear parents,
the Church brings us together to celebrate this awaited and well-prepared day,
Today, for the first time, your children will meet Jesus,
real and alive
-Priscilla, -in the sacrament of the Holy Communion,
-From now on, -Priscilla,
they will start a journey
with your help and that of our congregation,
towards a new life experience
with our Lord Jesus on their side,
And your brother?
My brother is an asshole,
You're such an asshole,
You couldn't just let her know?
Now she's going to blame it on me, And she already hates me,
It's not like you do shit to make her like you,
I'm actually cooking here
because I promised Priscilla I'd make her stuffed tomatoes,
Stop pretending you don't know,
Go ahead and spoil her! Like her parents aren't spoiling her enough already!
We're going to look so bad, None of us attended,
What do you mean none of us? Where's Zoe?
I don't know, Do you?
She didn't come back last night,
She didn't come back? Have you tried calling her?
Of course, She's not picking up,
Fine, I'll try calling her,
I told you she's not picking up!
Okay, I'll try anyway, Come on,
-Bye, -Bye,
-Oh, sweetheart? -What?
I'm mad as fuck,
Bye,
Pass it to the side!
What the fuck? Just shoot it,
DAD
That bitch!
Leave it, She's just having fun,
Come on, Anto!
Guys, keep them marked!
Remember who's your man! One on one!
Don't fuck with me!
What the fuck do you want, you piece of shit?
He's yours, Anto!
-Throw it away! -Kick it far!
Come on! Go!
-Yes! -Goal!
Goal! Yes!
Come on, Captain!
-Yes! -Yes, come on!
Yes!
Yes, we fucked them! Boom!
Fuck,
-Come on! Go! -That's how it's done!
Fuck off! Wake up, guys!
What the fuck is your problem?
What the fuck do you want?
Wake up!
Hey, Paolo,
What's wrong with your son today? What is he doing?
We're all counting on him here, Go figure,
Let's stay focused,
No, man… Is it over?
Of course not, Can't you see it's just half time?
Come on, let's sit over there,
I need some rolling paper and a filter,
I don't believe in God or miracles,
And if any of you do, you're very much mistaken,
Here, you can only win by fighting,
Don't wait for help from the sky,
Is that clear?
Yes, Coach,
So why the fuck are you standing like that?
Antonio,
Do you believe in this?
Yes, Coach,
So why do you always kick this fucking ball to fucking hell?
Dario, Do you believe in this?
I'm so sorry, Coach, I should have kept my legs closed,
Your mother should have kept hers closed!
I don't know about you,
but I'm fucking sick of losing to these shits,
I'm sick of seeing trophies being waved in my face,
I can't take it anymore!
Now I want you to go out on that pitch and kick the living shit out of them,
Bite their ankles! Bark if necessary!
They have to shit themselves when they look at you!
I want to smell shit out there!
And I want to smell it for 45 minutes!
And if I don't smell it, I swear, this summer, I'll take you on a retreat,
and I'll make you do push-ups on the sand under the sun until you shit blood!
They won't win,
Not here, Not at home,
Not today,
Do you want to win this fucking trophy?
Yes, Coach,
I can't hear you!
Yes!
Now get the fuck out!
Leo,
That's it!
-What a game, -Did you see what he did?
He kicked that fucking ball like a bomb, and he sent it to hell,
Come on! 3-0, That's it, Look out,
-Hi, Leo, -Hey,
I'm like a beast, I'm with you!
You're telling me? There you go!
-Where's my dad? -He's over there,
-How is he? -How do you think? He's going crazy,
Serves him right, If he looks for me, tell him I've gone,
Sure,
Hey, What's wrong?
No, it's just that the stuff you gave me…
It's good, but I think they laced it with laxatives,
Finally, Where the fuck were you?
-Just leave it, -And you? The game?
-Leave it, -Let me smoke,
Yes, that's better,
Is it good at least?
It's good, man, I got it from Amsterdam, It's the shit,
Hey, we have to go,
See you later,
Wait! Don't throw it away, please,
-It's just the butt, -It's okay, I'll still have it,
There you go, Kill it,
Should I get someone to warm up?
No, wait, Gianni, Let's see how it goes,
Sorry, Claudio, Do you have a minute?
Yes, sure, Go ahead, Gianni, I'll be right there, What's wrong?
How's it going, Claudio?
"How's it going?" We're losing,
It's just that I made a little bet,
We're down by three goals, I'm starting to get nervous,
How much did you bet?
I mean, not too much,
Italo, How much did you fucking bet?
Fucking keep it down!
Have you completely lost your mind?
Help me, please,
How the fuck am I supposed to help you?
I don't know, Set something up with the other coaches?
I have some money, It's not too much, but I can pay,
What the fuck are you talking about?
What am I supposed to tell the kids? Hey!
Help me, please!
Get out of my way,
Claudio, don't be like that!
How much do you want, Claudio?
How much do you fucking want?
Cla! Hey! Can you hear me?
Come on, Let's go 50-50, It's good money, right?
Hey! You could use it,
Besides, aren't you having a little girl? Think about it!
You piece of shit! How dare you?
Leave my family out of this, Got it?
What were you thinking, betting on the kids?
It was an accident, It's my son's fault, You know Leo!
Cut the bullshit,
I swear, he fucked me up,
Shut up!
You're hurting me!
Cla,
You have to win this game,
or else they're going to take everything,
The bar, the kids, the pitch, All of it,
What the fuck are you talking about? Who took your bet?
I don't have a penny left, I lost it all, I don't know what to do,
Look what has become of you, Shit, look at you,
Paying off a junkie's debts,
Hey, Who the fuck do you think you are?
You've trained the kids' team for 30 years and never won shit!
Not even one trophy,
And now what?
You've decided that this game is the Champion's League final?
Go fuck yourself!
Look at me,
I said look at me!
As soon as this game is over,
no matter the result, you will never see me again,
Now go away,
Get off my pitch before I kill you in front of my kids,
And pray to your god that I win this game,
Hello?
Babe? Sorry, I know you're at the game, but the school called me,
They told me that you should call them back immediately,
On a Sunday?
What can I say? Maybe they changed their mind,
Yes, right,
Cla, don't get upset,
I called Father Mario yesterday,
He told me that the position is still open,
You did what?
That school is amazing,
It's private, It has a lot of sports grounds,
lots of classrooms,
and you could keep teaching Physical Education,
-What more do you want? -Listen, Roberta, I told you already,
I really don't want to teach at a faith school, I just can't,
-Why do you care? It's still money, -Enough, It's out of the question!
Okay, but take it easy,
Take it easy? We're losing 3-0,
Do you hear yourself? You're so bitter,
Listen, how's the baby?
She's so nervous, She keeps kicking,
I read in a magazine that if you give birth in your forties,
chances are your baby will have psychological problems,
What are you talking about?
No, really, A psychiatrist from New York said so,
The Americans know this stuff,
They know nothing,
And with a father like you, surely, I have nothing to worry about,
Oh, god, there she is,
What?
She kicked, Do you want to hear?
Can you hear her?
No,
Really? You can't hear her?
No,
How about now? Can you hear her?
Robe, I can't hear anything,
What can I say? You'll hear her when you come home,
Bye, babe,
Come on, Anto!
Come on! Let's go, guys!
Go! They're ours,
Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy name…
Thy Kingdom come…
Thy will be done…
On Earth as it is in Heaven,
Give us this day our daily bread…
Forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us,
and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil,
Let's play,
Easy,
Come back,
Come on!
Oh, come on, Please, man, you have to treat me well,
You have to,
I'll make you look good on Saturday too,
I've booked a table for fifteen people, Five guys and ten tarty women,
What do you say?
What? Well…
Okay, then,
Talk to you soon,
Hugs,
Bye,
Come on, guys!
Go, come on!
Again!
Go, Tommi, Quicker, come on,
Quick! Come on!
Come on, guys, Go!
What's with that face, Paolo?
You have to relax,
Hey, What the fuck are you doing?
What am I doing?
-Do you want to tell him? -No, you tell him,
Shall I tell him? Who am I, Paolo?
The president's son, I cannot make the bet in person, right?
Do you think they're stupid?
They're not, So we're sending the innocent-looking Marcello,
Look how pretty he is,
Paolo, chill out, It's not my first time,
Have you talked to him yet?
Tonight,
-Tonight? -Yes,
Don't screw up, okay?
Don't screw this up, Paolo,
Go!
Go! Come on!
Come on, guys, Go!
-Good morning, Remo! -Hi, Leo,
Okay, 20 balls, the ones with the good leather you talked to me about,
Got it?
That's good, yes, Me, too, Thanks,
Goodbye,
Hey!
Look who's here! Leo!
Are you ready, Dad?
For what?
-Open it, -What is it?
I told you to open it,
-What's this? -It's the future,
Let me introduce it to you,
Artificial turf, third generation, It's made of polyethylene,
Feel how soft it is,
Feel it here,
-Are you feeling it? -I'm feeling it!
It's like playing on velvet with this,
Feels like plastic to me,
Plastic?
Dad, No more stones,
No more holes, no more kids cutting their knees open, no more cursing,
This is our breakthrough,
On Tuesday the vans are coming, ready for installation,
-Tuesday? -Yes, Tuesday,
It's the end of the season, Tomorrow's the final…
Fifty thousand euros?
You told me,
-When? -You told me on Christmas Day,
Hey, have you lost the last good neuron in your brain?
We're in May, Got it?
You had no fucking right
to sign a contract without telling me!
Last time I checked, I was the CEO of the company,
No, you're a dick! And you have to shut up!
And where the fuck were we for Christmas?
At Grandma's, We were all there,
Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle Claudio, Aunt Gina, the kids,
They're all witnesses to what we talked about,
Oh, god, what a shitty Christmas,
I'm ruined,
Why ruined, Dad?
Can you listen to me for once?
For once in your life, can you listen to me? Yes or no?
With artificial turf, you won't even need a team anymore,
You can just rent the pitch by the hour,
From morning until night,
And there will be people of all ages, from 15 to 70,
They come, they play, they pay, and they leave,
And you'll only have two bills to pay, Power and water,
That's it, Nothing else, The rest is pure profit,
All the teams in the area will all be lining up
to come and train here,
And at that point, if you want another team,
you'll get another team,
Nobody's stopping you,
But we have to do this now,
Immediately, Because these pitches are mushrooming left and right,
And we need to find a steady client base from the beginning,
This is the future,
And if we don't keep up with the times, they're going to bury us under this dirt,
Hey!
Are you praying, Dad? What are you doing?
What's wrong?
"What's wrong?"
Are you fucking with me?
I've just finished paying off your fucking debts,
you ungrateful junkie!
Okay? I have no money left!
How the fuck are we supposed to pay for all of this stuff?
Tell me!
And I've never liked that artificial crap anyway,
I like the ground, Okay?
The dirt, The dust, The filth,
All those scratches sticking to your skin,
This sport
was born on the dirt!
So what if it was born on the dirt?
Now that things are changing, are we not supposed to adjust?
Where the fuck is it written that the pitch has to stay the same forever?
Claudio doesn't like artificial turf either,
That Claudio again? It's always the same story,
"Claudio this, Claudio that," Is Claudio the owner of the pitch?
This championship has been running for 40 years, Has he ever won?
He has, my ass!
Hey! Claudio has been training the team since before you were even born!
-Who gives a fuck? -Hey! Don't you dare!
Dad, calm down, You'll have a stroke, Stop, please,
In a few years, they'll be playing World Cups on artificial pitches,
Understand?
Sooner or later, we'll have to do it,
So let's do it now,
Let's start making money now, okay?
Dad, The dirt is dead,
Are you ready for tomorrow?
-Yes, Coach, I'm ready, -Good,
What are you still doing here? Go home, Training is over,
Five minutes, and I'll go,
So?
What do you say?
I want to win,
I want to take on the world,
You sure?
I don't want anything else,
You have to walk the line then,
because the pitch does not forgive, even if you're a champ,
It's all in here,
I know, Coach,
Let's go now, Come on! That's enough! Get the fuck out of here!
Hey, it's all there, okay?
And don't sell to him anymore, Got it?
And why is that?
With such a caring father, we're covered,
If I were Leo, I'd be a junkie too,
Thank you, Mr, President,
-Wait, Where are you going? -What?
-I want to make a bet, -For real?
You really want to sneak into the business again?
Am I going to have to break your other leg too?
Fifty thousand on Sporting Roma losing tomorrow,
Are you serious?
Yes, fifty thousand,
Okay, We can make this bet,
But let's make it clean, okay?
We'll bet on the loss, so you can't arrange it,
-Of course not, -And you'll bet on the victory,
Are you okay with that?
Mr, President, we don't have all day,
That's fine,
I'll tell the boss,
Be careful, Mr, President,
Be careful,
Giulia, go to your room,
But why, Dad? It's still early,
I said go to your room, I have to talk to Antonio,
-But, Dad! -Just go!
Jeez, this sucks,
Whatever,
What?
You're a big boy now, right?
You need to know certain things,
Are you dying?
Anto, I'm unemployed,
Your mother is working overtime again tonight, You see?
She said she needed some fresh air,
Anto, listen to me, I have to tell you something important,
Tomorrow, you have to lose,
What?
You must play badly, Don't score,
-What are you talking about? -What?
I'm just telling you the way things are, You must do as I say, that's it,
No, I can't,
Look at me,
You have to do this, This isn't up for discussion,
For everybody's sake, Do you understand?
Nobody should know about this,
Not even your mother,
You're a man now, right?
And men make sacrifices,
What sacrifices? What the fuck are you talking about?
Tomorrow's the final game!
I don't give a fuck about the fucking finals!
Can't you think of your family for once?
Do you understand that we need you right now? Yes or no?
There is always next year, Why do you care?
No, not next year!
-What are you saying? -Where are you going? Come here!
I'm your father,
And you have to do as I say, Do you understand?
You're a huge piece of shit,
I hate you!
The A-League is one thing, but real life is something else,
Article 1 of the Italian Constitution reads, "In Football We Trust,"
There are more than 7,000 football academies around the country,
A shocking number, considering there are, by comparison, 8,000 middle schools
and 16,000 primary schools,
An army of young football players with big dreams,
300,000 little soldiers in oversized jerseys,
who will inevitably end up doing something else,
Future mechanics, office workers, accountants…
You're saying that children today cannot dream of becoming football players,
But children need to dream, am I right?
We shouldn't kill their dreams but neither give them false hopes,
We have to teach them that life is not all about football,
Let's teach them the value of studying, working, and being better citizens,
Kids who dream of becoming professional footballers…
TERMINATING THE WORK AGREEMENT
WE ARE FORCED TO LAY YOU OFF
For those kids, a ball is like a crystal ball,
They see their future in it, but the reality is merciless,
It's only a number, but a recent study has shown
that only one in five thousand players goes on to become a pro,
Thanks to Riccardo Cucchi, Let's continue,
For the third consecutive year, the winner of the A-League championship
will only be determined at the very last game,
Hey! You're still here?
Come on, let me take you home,
Let's go now,
Come on,
Come on, I got you, Okay? Let's go,
Look at the condition you're in, Italo,
Where are you going?
What? I'm taking my moped,
Are you crazy or what? You can't even stand on your feet,
Hey, give me a break!
For your information, I'm a professional alcoholic!
Right, "professional," I don't want you on my conscience,
Unbelievable, Come on, let me take you home, Let's go,
Oh, fuck this! Listen!
I've driven in much more extreme conditions, Okay?
Once, in Carsoli…
I was coming back from Carsoli…
No, Whatever, I don't give a damn, I don't want to know,
Do as you wish, At least wear a helmet,
Hey, Italo, Don't kill yourself, please,
Come on,
-Claudio? -What?
Nothing,
What's wrong?
-Nothing, -No, tell me,
I said nothing,
Are you sure?
Relax!
Just go, It's something silly,
What is?
Oh, what a bore! I told you it's nothing,
-What do you mean it's nothing? -It means that I have nothing to tell you!
No, I want to know,
-About what? -How would I know?
-Whatever you have to tell me, -Are you deaf?
I told you it's nothing, Go home, Jeez,
No, you're going to tell me now,
Tell you what?
I don't know! You tell me!
But I have nothing to tell you!
Italo, you can't behave like this, okay?
-Like how? -Like this!
First, you say you have something to tell me, then you say it's nothing,
You either tell me or you don't!
Of course, I'm going to be curious!
-Bye, Cla, -Yes, bye,
You're keeping something from me,
Just leave, for fuck's sake!
Go fuck yourself,
What a pain in the ass,
Dear listeners, good morning from our central studio,
It's Judgment Day,
The two teams are ninety minutes away from either glory or demise,
Everything's ready in Rome,
where more than 60,000 Inter fans are expected,
This whole city is on high alert,
while in Milan, giant screens have been installed
in the Piazza del Duomo
in the hope of celebrating with their team
for a pennant that has been missing there for 13 years,
A pulse-pounding last game of the season, where no mistakes are allowed,
178 countries are watching, 80,000 people in the stands,
and just as many people are expected in the squares,
It seems like the perfect game to win the title,
but in the end, only one team will live in history,
So while we're waiting for updates from other teams,
let's go to Riccardo Cucchi and Bruno Gentile
for the Lazio-Inter match at the Olympic Stadium,
The Olympic Stadium is all black and blue,
Seventy-six thousand people in attendance,
There are only Inter fans in the south stand,
But every sector of the stadium, with the exception of the north stand,
is occupied by Inter fans, standing together with Lazio fans,
Supporters of the two teams are twinned, as you all know,
It's clear how Roman fans are feeling today,
Go long, Go ahead,
Attack!
-Here it is, Go! -Go long!
That's good, Run!
Don't give up now!
Yes!
That's it!
We're 15 minutes in, Time is flying by,
It's not a game for the faint of heart, it's incredibly intense,
Go! Over there! Go wide!
Frank, go warm up!
Yes, Coach,
My god, I'm so hungry,
Wait, here you go, Eat this!
You're the best,
Quick, You too, Tommi, Go warm up! Come on, hurry!
I'm so high,
Tell me about it,
The artificial turf is coming on Tuesday,
At 8:30, I've already scheduled it,
Well done, Marcello,
Now get your foot off my ride, you'll get it dirty,
Come on, Sporting!
Jeez, this game is so frigging boring,
My god, yes,
Shall we go?
Yes, let's go,
I have five euros left, Let's go to the arcade,
The arcade? Again? You're obsessed with it,
Don't you like pussy at all?
Where the hell is all this pussy?
Come on,
And now? Not singing anymore?
Open the door! Quick!
-Come on! -You're in deep shit now,
Come on!
That way, Here,
Goddammit, That bastard!
-Go, Anto! -Go long!
Go!
Stop him!
Go!
-No! -Come on, Go!
As per usual!
Don't give up, Antonio! Come on,
What's wrong?
Wake up! What the fuck are you doing?
Careful!
-Antonio! -Come on, guys!
Come on, guys! Go wide!
Let's score this goal! Come on!
In the middle!
-No! -Yes!
Goal! Let's go!
Goal! Yes!
Well done, Anto!
-Come on! -Yes!
I knew it!
Let's go! Come on!
Frank, sit down for now,
Come on, guys!
Let's do this, guys! Okay?
Go, Captain, let's rip it!
I'll kill you,
-Hello? -Where the fuck is my brother?
I've been looking for him the whole day! He didn't even pick up his phone once!
Do you know how long I've waited for him? One hour,
Laura, I'm mortified,
Paolo had a setback, they've called him for a job interview…
On a Sunday?
On a Sunday, yes,
You liar, I know he's at the game,
These things happen, It's the final game,
Well, you could have told me,
You two are rude assholes,
And you made asses of yourselves with Father Mario,
He was asking for you,
Did everything go well, at least?
Like you even care,
Listen, Gianna, do me a favor,
Don't wear that horrid floral dress because I can't handle it,
I hope those fucking tomatoes are to die for,
I'm having a heart attack,
Seriously, I'm having a heart attack,
You took a picture down from here, see?
You with your fucking big head,
Did you know that there's a tribe somewhere in New Guinea
where kids are forced to drink the sperm of the elders
because they say it makes them stronger?
Why are you telling me this? My goodness,
I don't know, I've read it on the web,
Or like, in Ancient Egypt, pharaohs used to masturbate every day in the Nile,
Well, now we do that in the shower,
Give me that joint,
But you do it because you're a horny pig, They did it to prevent famines,
Well, because pharaohs
were considered living gods, so they did… Right?
Their sperm was godly,
and when transported by the Nile's waters, it would fertilize the land around it,
Yes, Okay, I've studied too, you know?
Look at her, Little know-it-all, You're so full of shit,
The expert's in the house,
-The expert's in the house, -Hey, this is culture,
-Oh, really? -The first superstitious act of history,
-That's what it is, -That's true, Yes,
Don't move,
Close your eyes!
You can't move!
Again with these polaroids,
Are you falling asleep?
Are you?
Do you want me to drive you home?
Do you ever feel like everything is moving except for you?
Always,
-Hey, I'm being serious, -I know,
Like at night,
the moment before you fall asleep…
You look at the ceiling,
and you think you've figured out everything you want,
Just like that,
But then you fall asleep,
and the next morning,
that feeling is gone,
You don't remember anything,
I don't want to get out of this car,
Are you a philosopher?
-Yes, -Good,
Okay, but now I need to pee first,
Oh, god, what a bore!
What can I do?
The expressions on their faces need no explanation,
You can see the fear of failure,
and of course, fatigue is starting to take over,
The situation is getting dramatic,
Yes!
Goddammit!
Now the players seem to have lost all hope,
The team, apparently, has given up,
Ref! Substitution!
Come, take the jacket off,
-You're going in, -Go, Tommi!
-Well done, -Come on!
Don't give up! Come on!
What the fuck was in that thing?
My god,
Come on,
Right, my ass,
Come on, Tommi!
Another one, My god,
Kick them in the shins!
Go now!
-Go! -Come on, Anto!
Goal!
Come on, Anto!
The north stand cheered for this goal scored by Lazio,
Yes!
-Yes! -That's it, boys,
Get up, I didn't do anything to you,
What the fuck do you want?
Go check on him,
Get up, Anto!
Get out of the way,
It's always the same story,
Get ready, Up!
-Look at what you've done! -What the fuck do you want?
Hey, asshole!
Hey! Ref! That's a red card! Out!
Bastards!
No, he's kicking him out, Fuck you!
Yes!
Go fuck yourself! You're a buffoon!
Did you see that? Good job, You piece of shit,
What the fuck are you looking at? Asshole!
-Cla, relax! -Go to hell!
Shut up! You're a loser, Okay?
-You're thieves! You bastards! -Calm down, Claudio,
I pity you, You hear me? You're pathetic,
See you outside!
Go home,
-Fucking thieves! -Let them be, Claudio,
Yes, okay, I'll relax,
Antonio!
Antonio, can you hear me?
Stay still, Don't move your leg,
Come on, Antonio!
Stay still, Don't move your leg!
-You're okay, -Go, Come on, guys!
Don't move, Let me see, Antonio,
Come on now, Can you hear me? Antonio!
Don't move,
You have to tell me if you can move it, Can you move it?
So? What am I supposed to do?
Leo!
We have to leave!
Leo?
Leo!
Where the fuck is he?
It hurts, Don't touch it,
-Does it hurt if I touch here? -Yes,
-What now? -How much time is left?
Well… Two minutes, Plus overtime,
Come on, Frank, warm up, Hurry up,
No, Coach, Wait,
Slowly, Take it easy,
-Wait, -Easy, Stay still,
You can't lift it up, If it's broken or fractured, it's going to be a problem,
Strap it up,
Anto, I can't let you play like this, You could've broken it,
Just strap it!
You could completely snap it on the first contact,
Come on, just strap his ankle, Hurry up!
I'm against it, Gianni, you're my witness, okay?
Sit down, Frank,
Okay, that's it, Well done,
Come on, quicker,
Come on, Go,
Run, Well done, Go wide,
-Go! -Pass the ball!
Come on, there you go, That's good,
Go back!
No! Come on! Fuck that!
Come on!
Ref, it's over!
One minute!
Kill them,
Come on, Antonio, Well done, You can do it, Good job!
Go, champ!
Son of a bitch,
Ref! Hey!
I'll follow you to the bathroom,
You got it! Run!
-Run! -Look at him!
Go on, down the wing!
Go! Come on, they're strong,
Come on!
No!
Kill them! Break them!
Go on, Anto! Come on!
Careful, guys,
Go there, Down the wing,
Hey, Anto! Give it to me!
Hey, Keep an eye on that one!
Go, again!
-Yes! Penalty! Come on! -Penalty!
Penalty! In your face!
Where was the fucking penalty?
That's the right call, you idiot! Just shut up, you don't know shit,
Come on, that's not fair! The game was over!
He didn't even touch him!
Go away!
Thanks, man,
What the fuck just happened?
What now? Who's kicking?
Please, Antonio! I beg you!
Come on, Anto!
-Come on, you can do it! -You can do it! Come on!
Come on, Anto!
Come on, Anto, Please, I beg you,
Come on, Anto, Please do it,
Come on, you're a champion!
Come on, Antonio!
-Come on, Antonio! -Come on, Anto!
Go fuck yourself,
Yes!
Hi, Uncle!
Hey, honey,
Hi, champ,
What's wrong? It didn't go well?
Don't worry, you'll get your chance,
Where's Zoe?
She's coming,
Anto, do me a favor,
Here, take a picture of me and Maria,
Come on, hug me, Wait,
Great, Keep it, Take some more pictures, Anto,
What's this?
Honey, it's a puzzle, It's made of little pieces--
I know what a puzzle is! It sucks!
Oh, please, honey, Don't worry, There are more presents coming,
Give me another one,
Yes, the tomatoes are coming!
Hurray!
Don't worry, I'll do it myself,
Let me do it, or we'll only get to eat tomorrow, Move,
It's not enough,
What?
There are not enough tomatoes for everyone,
I didn't know there'd be this many people,
Of course, You're only ever thinking of yourself,
You're overreacting,
The first one is for my darling,
Yes!
We'll divide them, So everybody gets one,
Stop being such a bitch,
Hey, watch your mouth, okay? You can't talk like that in my house,
Nor in mine! But there's a limit,
I shouldn't have invited you,
You fucking bitch!
Hey, are you crazy?
Fucking tomatoes!
-That's it! -Easy, Please, stop!
Come here! Paolo, get out of the way!
What the fuck?
Come here, You and your shitty tomatoes!
I told you to come here!
No! Back off!
-You fucking whore! Come here! -Stop it!
You fucking whore!
What the fuck are you doing throwing tomatoes?
-You're such a bitch! -You and your husband!
She's right! You're such an asshole!
I hate you!
-Come here! Shit! Let me go! -Enough!
Fucking bitch!
Stop!
Stop, hey!
Let me up, and I'll finish her off!
-Who are you finishing off? -Let me go!
There you go, You like tomatoes? So eat them!
Stop it, Leave her alone!
You know, the doctor said she'll probably arrive two weeks late,
How about we go to the beach? That would be nice,
Honey, what's with that face?
Come on, everything's going to be okay,
Hey! I heard her!
Time to get ready now, We're already late,
Can you clear the table?
Yes, sure,
Hello?
Hello, Father Mario?
Who's this?
It's Claudio Bulla,
Roberta's husband, Sorry about the time,
Claudio! Don't worry at all, It's not a bother,
To what do I owe the pleasure?
No, It's about that position,
Is it still available?
Shut up,
As I keep saying,
food is an immortal market,
You can't go wrong,
You know, people are hungry,
They have to eat,
Sure, You've got to be good with investments,
You've known me for ages, so you know that,
I've always loved investing,
I've always done it ever since I used to sell pot at school,
So there it is,
A contract, freshly made,
A very basic change of ownership,
You sign where it says to sign, and we're even,
You won't owe me one euro,
In return, I'll take the pitch and I won't kill you,
You know, after all, I'm a reasonable guy,
So? What do you say?
I'll sign it,
I'll sign everything,
I'll give you everything,
The pitch, the kids, the bar, Everything,
As long as you promise to leave us alone,
Me,
My son,
We may be a shitty family, but…
he has nothing to do with this,
Alfredo, That's enough, Get out,
About time!
My goodness,
Thank you, You've been very kind,
That's the least I could do,
I'm so hungry now, I've been digging for two hours straight,
Eat, Recover your strength,
Are there mushrooms in it?
Porcini, They're organic, Straight from my woods,
Thank you, Umberto, but I don't eat mushrooms, I don't like them,
Oh, well, Suits you, They're the only fresh ones in it,
Eat, Don't be a baby,
Give me the pitch,
and I promise that I won't lay a finger on anyone,
But Leo, he's staying,
Leo?
There's room for him in this adventure,
Adventure?
What the fuck are you talking about?
Hey! Leo, my son has nothing to do with it!
-Shut up! -That hurts!
-Will you shut up?
You hurt me!
Who gives a fuck?
I mean…
Did you not read it? It's all in there,
My lawyer suggested it,
He said to keep a low profile,
I shouldn't buy everything on the spot,
I should leave a minority stake to the seller,
Read,
What does it say?
"One percent,"
Well done, One percent,
But, obviously, for loyalty reasons,
your son will be in charge of that one percent,
Understand? Now, give us a fucking break,
Come on, Just sign it,
Or I'll kill you first, and then your idiot son,
-Here, take the pen, Come on, -It hurts,
Come on,
Sign, Here,
That a boy,
I can't,
Wait, the last one,
I can't do it!
A cross is enough, Come on,
Leave it in his office,
Office?
What fucking office are you talking about? Hey, come back!
You've been here for 30 years,
and you still can't recognize your fucking turf,
Hey! Lights on!
Look, Picture this,
Here, everything will be green and nice,
Bam!
The ball will roll smoothly without any of those sudden bounces,
The stands…
The stands will be full of people,
The bleachers will be crawling with fans,
encouraging the players on at every moment,
I get the chills, I feel like I'm at the Olympic Stadium,
We'll get rid of that fucking bar and replace it with a nice restaurant,
It will be open day and night,
A satellite TV, so they can watch all the games,
Entire families need to come here,
Games, tournaments, summer camps,
and also Communions, Confirmations, and birthday parties,
Everything,
They'll play football, Five-a-side, eight-man football,
Then we'll build two tennis courts and a pool, and we'll kill it!
A state-of-the-art sports center!
The vision…
You can have everything, but without vision,
you're just a stand-in,
Goodbye, Mr, President,
Okay, Umberto, I got it, But now let me go, please,
Umberto,
Please, Umberto,
Please!
-I beg you! -Easy now!
That hurts!
You bastard!
We had a deal, me and you!
You promised!
You can't just kill me like this,
Understand? You gave me your word!
My word?
Really?
You still don't get it?
My word is worth shit,
Just like yours,
-Umberto! -Stay still!
Umberto!
Don't leave me alone! Umberto!
Umberto!
Umberto! Please forgive me,
Mr, President, the game is over,
I used to play here as a kid,
I would come here every day,
I'd show up even before training, and the janitor would open it for me,
Then, in the evening, my dad would pick me up,
You have no idea how many balls I have kicked here over the fence,
-So you sucked, -I didn't suck! I did well!
-Not well enough, apparently, -No, I did really well!
Come on now,
It's been ages since I last came here,
And I live around the corner, That's crazy,
Crazy,
DAD
Antonio,
Anto!
-Anto, -What?
-Your dad's calling you, -I know, I'll call him back,
This is the tenth time that he's called,
I'll call back later,
Are you sure you're okay?
Yes,
All right,
Listen, I'm hungry,
Yes, me too,
Sure, Sit in the front,