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Yasuko, Songs of Days Past [Jp title: Never to Return]
Morning,
I was headed to school,
but as I walked in the rain, I changed my mind,
Oh, that persimmon,
I found it lying on the roof,
I was the one who left it there,
I was going to write a poem,
With a persimmon?
I keep looking at it everyday,
It's like a stare down,
There's a moment when it hits me, ‘Ah, I get it,’
That's poetry,
Sweet,
You're leaving?
Where are you going?
Do you have somewhere to go?
It'll work out somehow,
You speak like it's not your concern,
Because things have always worked out all this time,
I see,
I might not be able to return it, you know,
That's fine,
Hey!
Why don't you come up for a bit?
At least till the rain stops,
Hang out with me?
Dammit, I can't do anything with this card,
Gah! Screw this,,, bastard!
Yes, I got sankou! (Three Bright - a specific card combination in the game of koi koi),
This can only mean,,,
Ha! Kirishima!
117, sankou, kirishima,,,
That's 151 mon, (Old Japanese currency)
114 mon,,,
37 mon, thank you very much,
Aaah!
Another round!
I used to be a member of an acting troupe, you know,
In between gigs, this was all we did all day,
You?
You'll be lucky to keep the shirt on your back,
Just how much did I lose?
Let's see,,,
Three yen fifty cents,
You were travelling with a man,,,
Was it that kind of relationship?
What kind?
Physical,
Just once,
And then, goodbye,
The rain has stopped, I should get going,
I've made enough for tonight's lodging,
You can stay here if you'd like,
Use this place like an inn,
You serious?
We're still a man and a woman,
Don't you think that kinda weird?
I'm starving,
Let's go eat,
I know a good restaurant,
Mmm,,,
Delicious,
It's French,
If you don't mind me asking, kid,
How old are you?
Seventeen,
Seventeen!
Hahaha,,,
What,,, seventeen?
You're three years younger than me,
If you've lived 17 years, that counts as an adult,
Seriously,
You dress weird and talk down to people around you,
Seventeen, eh?
Who would've thought,
Can you afford such luxury?
Is this considered a luxury?
I'm looking for a more refined and exquisite kind of luxury,
That would be,,,
Poetry,
Isn't that something really easy? For you at least,
My scribbles are but just a hollow semblance of poetry,
I've yet to truly grasped what poetry really is,
I hope I'll get it one day, though,
You can put our futons together, you know,
It's a debt of gratitude for a meal and a night's lodging,
No one's twisting your arm here,
Hey, sis,
I'll call in the favour the next time we meet,
Don't even think about laying a finger on me,
Boy,
"Boy?"
Ah, you're up,
Breakfast's ready,
I'm completely hopeless at cooking,
I've never cooked anything before,
Mmm,,, it's pretty good,
Huh?
Isn't this ginger?
Yes, it is,
Ginger miso soup?
Well there wasn't anything else I could put in it,
Is that a problem?
Well, it's actually rather tasty,
I'll be heading to Makino Productions later,
Movies?
You're going to be a movie actress?
I'll be able to make some money, right? If it's movies,
Princess! Be careful,
Princess!
Prin,,,cess,,,,
Cut!
That's no good,
That's not at all how a lady-in-waiting behaves!
I'm sorry,
Hey you, what kind of performance was that?
You think this is Shakespeare?
You think you're the lead?
Well, I always consider myself the lead,
Oi!
Ah, it feels good!
When I'm on my skates, it's like I'm the wind,
It's so much fun,
Makes you happy?
When I find myself drenched in darkness,
I get on my skates and just go,
This is how I care for my mental wellbeing,
One two,,, yes, yes, yes,,,
- Ooh,,, - Woah!
That's good, that's it,,,
One, two,,, one,,,
What's wrong?
That's me over there,
In there,
I understand,
I understand,,,
My mother, she's,,,
a really fragile person,
I have to die,
I can't live like this,
You have to take me with you!
Mommy!
You lied to me!
Mommy!
I want to follow you, even into the afterlife!
Mommy!
That wasn't the first time my mother tried to kill herself,
And I have the blood of a crazy mother in me,
You know, I had too much happiness in the past,
The past?
When I was a child, five or six,
That sure is a long time ago,
Can you lend me some money?
You made some today didn't you?
Won't you lend it to me?
I sure could,
Ahhh,
You're a great help,
I'm going to get myself a hooker,
Huh?
What are you doing here?
Hmm?
Oh,
Thanks for waiting,
- Aren't you pretty? - Yeah, a real beaut eh,
- Let's hang out, - How about a drink?
C'mon, let's go somewhere nice!
- Hey, where are you going? - So it's a no then?
You!!
Argh!
- Hey get up! - Oi!
Murderer!
Murderer! Murderer! Murderer!
Who are you calling a murderer?
Police officer! They're trying to kill him!
Killers!
Are you okay?
Hey,,,
Wake up!
Today is such a wonderful Sunday
Let's all be friends and play, play, play
Beat the drums, play the flute
Tweet-tweet boom-boom, tweet-boom-boom
What's this?
Was this a girl you liked?
Ahh,,,
That's mine,
My ma knitted it for me,
It was in the winter of fifth grade,
Back then,,,
I was called a child prodigy,
So that was your golden era then?
It was the best of days,
Today,,,
Hasegawa-han! (Kansai dialect for san)
Yes!
The studio's on the phone for you,
It seems to be quite urgent,
I wonder if I got the part!
What is this, 'second lead,'
When did I become 'second lead?'
Well,,,
That's just studio-speak,
You didn't know?
You could be a writer, a poet, being 'second,,,'
Oh please,,, enough!
Do you enjoy insulting people?
You're just nasty,
Nasty?
Who do you think you are?
The nerve, talking to me like that?
Hasegawa-kun, apologise!
If you keep this up, you're not coming back to the studio,
Hey, brother,
Won't you come up and see me?
Come on in for a little pick-me-up,
Brother,,,
"Tobacco and Manteau in Love," The Dada Notebook (1924)
-- translated by Jeffrey Angles, Another Chicago Magazine
Just as it should have been
They were two of a kind
Tobacco male, Manteau female
One day, they threw themselves, off a cliff in a tragic love-suicide
Manteau was heavy but buoyed by wind
Tobacco was thin but light
They took the same amount of time
From the cliff to the surface of the sea
God observed and declared this incident
Utterly ordinary in a universe of relativity
And handed out leaflets in heaven
The couple saw this and when they learned
This all had to do with their happiness
Their love was ruined for all time
Tobacco [cigarette] and Manteau [cloak] in love
Just as it should have been
They were two of a kind
Tobacco male, Manteau female
One day, they threw themselves, off a cliff in a tragic love-suicide
Manteau was heavy but buoyed by wind
Tobacco was thin but light
They took the same amount of time
From the cliff to the surface of the sea
God observed and declared this incident
Utterly ordinary in a universe of relativity
And handed out leaflets in heaven
The couple saw this and when they learned
This all had to do with their happiness
Their love was ruined for all time
Interesting,,,
Really?
Hey,,, stop!
That was a lie,
What I said about buying a hooker,
Actually, I went to see a friend,
Tominaga, he's a poet,
Hello,
Is Nakahara-kun in?
I'm Tominaga,
Come, let me do that,
Ah,,,
I'm a boarder in a geisha house in Miyagawa-cho,
Well, that means I live surrounded by women,,,
I learn by watching,
If I may ask,,,
What is it?
So you're a poet?
Well,,,
Here,
Studies in French Literature Issue 1
Please give this to Nakahara-kun for me,
There's an essay in there by a critic called Kobayashi Hideo,
It's one of the best critiques I've read of French Symbolist poetry,
Are you leaving already?
Eh?
Ah,, I suppose,
Well, I'd better,,,
Excuse me,
- Are you leaving? - No,,,
Umm,,,
That's how it is,
My apologies,
Give my regards to Nakahara-kun,
Tominaga was coughing up blood,
So you just stood by and watched?
Didn't you even think of letting him rest in the room for a little bit?
Tominaga is a really important person to me!
He's the only friend I have here in Kyoto!
I'm sorry I wasn't brought up properly,
I didn't know how to show the appropiate hospitality,,,
- I'm really sorry, - Wait,,,
- Thanks for having me,,, - I said, wait,,,
Don't you know what love is?
Don't you feel any love for other people?
I want to cry,
For myself and for others,
I just want to cry right now,
But,,,
The tears don't come,
Actually, I don't think,,,
I've ever cried in my life,
Goodbye,
Yasuko!
Hey!
Yasuko!
Arthur Rimbaud,
"O seasons, o castles" (1872), A Season in Hell (1873)
- Rimbaud: Complete Works, Selected Letters (1966), translated by Wallace Fowlie
O seasons, o castles
What soul is without flaws?
I carried out the magic study of happiness that no one eludes,
Oh! may it live long, each time
His Gallic cock sings
But I will have no more desires, It has taken charge of my life,
That charm! it took my soul and body,
and dispersed every effort,
What can be understood from my words? It makes them escape and fly off!
O seasons, o castles
O seaons, o castles
What soul is without flaws?
I carried out the magic study of happiness, that no one eludes,
Oh! may he live long, each time
His Gallic cock sings
But I will have no more desires, It has taken charge of my life,
That charm! it took my soul and body,
And dispersed every effort
What can be understood from my words? It makes them escape and fly off!
O seaons, o castles
This is it!
I've finally got it,
I'm back,
Ah,,,
What did you finally get?
Poetry,
Hey,,,
Why don't we go to Tokyo?
Tokyo?
Tominaga's gone back to Tokyo for medical treatment,
And I'm tired of Kyoto,
I'm not joining you,
- Why not? - I want to go to the department store,
The Mitsukoshi in Nihombashi,
I want to go see it at least once,
Well then, what about Nakamuraya? (famous curry restaurant)
You're not going to meet Kobayashi and the rest?
Everyone wants to meet you,
I don't want to see them,
Wait, why?
I'm your girl, aren't I?
"Oh an older woman,,, so that's her,"
Everyone's going to scrutinise me,
They can scrutinise all they want,
I'd have to feel like it,
Apparently Tominaga will be there too,
Seems that he's feeling much better,
That has nothing to do with me,
[In front of Shinjuku Station]
Hey, Yasuko!
You stupid woman!
How long do you plan to just go around Tokyo?
I came here to fight!
Argh!
"There's so many things, "
"that I want to say to you but,,, "
"I just can't bring myself to"
"say it out loud,,,"
Alright,
You,,,
If you don't mind the shared dressing room*, you can join us for a spell, (a member of a studio's acting pool, assigned minor, uncredited, roles)
Okay!
Ma'am, do you have a rag I could use?
My feet are covered in mud,
It's really bad out there,
Where's Nakahara?
He's out,
Is it alright if I wait for him here?
You're,,, Nakahara's wife, right?
I'm Kobayashi,
I see,
I was just at the hospital, Tominaga's condition has gotten worse,
Can you lend me a rag?
"The house that we're in now"
"Hasn't been ours for a very long time,"
"And so,,,"
"And so I,,,"
Ma'am,
Yes,
I'm making tea,,,
Your lines,
It's Chekov, isn't it?
"The Cherry Orchard,"
So you really are an actress,
It sounded like a lie coming from Nakahara,
Please forgive me,
Hey,
Oh, you're here,
Is this how you do things? Invite someone to your home and making them wait?
On top of that, your wife has her back turned to me the whole time,
Ahh, she's not good with strangers,
Bring me some tea, will ya!
I brought you this,
Rimbaud?
This is ‘A Season in Hell’?
“O saisons ô châteaux” "O seasons, o castles"
“Quelle âme est sans défauts?” "What soul is without flaws?"
“J'ai fait la magique étude” "I carried out the magic study"
Let it flow more,,,
“J'ai fait la magique étude” "I carried out the magic study"
Good,
“Du Bonheur qu'aucun n'élude,” "of happiness that no one eludes,"
“qu'aucun n'élude,” "that no one eludes,"
“Salut à lui chaque fois” "Oh! may it live long, each time"
“Que chante le coq gaulois,” "His Gallic cock sings"
"Ah! Je n'aurai plus d'envie” "But I will have no more desires"
“…vie” "-sires,"
“Ce charme a pris âme et corps” "That charm! it took my soul and body"
“âme et corps” "soul and body"
“Et dispersé les efforts” "and dispersed every effort"
“O saisons ô châteaux” "O seasons, o castles"
And what about Kobayashi's?
Why are you all giddy like that?
Kobayashi's tea?
It's fine, I'm leaving,
Eh?
Your wife doesn't seem to be in a good mood,
This is the first time I've seen Nakahara so happy, like a kid,
Oh, so that's why you're jealous?
Jealous?
Of Kobayashi?
Kobayashi-san,
You like Nakahara, don't you?
I dislike Nakahara,
I admit he's a genius,
But I don't like what comes with it,
I don't quite know what it is, but,,,
[TN: A first year student of French literature at Tokyo Imperial University, Kobayashi met Nakahara in April of 1925, In Kobayashi's journal entry from 7th September 1925, he describes his impression of Nakahara as a mixture of fascination and repulsion, Which Nakahara himself refers to as the 'filthiness of precociousness' 早熟の不潔さ,]
What it is, is the "filthiness of precociousness,"
Ah, so it is,
It's filthiness,
Yasuko!
The rain has stopped,
Yasuko, let's head out,
The three of us,
Tominaga-san may be drawing his last breath at the hospital as we speak,
And here we are, out on a boat,
This is just so odd,
Tominaga told me not to visit,
He said he didn't want anyone to see him die,
That's just like him,
A dandy to the very end,
That's not it,
He saw hope in death,
And he couldn't let anyone get in the way of that,
What hope is there in death?
For example, this is what death is like,
I bought this at the grocer's this morning,
And it's already bruised by the afternoon,
And if this bruise festers and spreads throughout,
Then this apple is no longer an apple,
That's all there is to it,
That same pain gnaws its way through all of us,
Isn't that right?
An extraordinarily potent toxin, pain,
How shallow,
Comparing human beings to apples,
When it comes to death,
Humans, roaches, apples,,, there's no difference at all,
Isn't that so?
Why this clear, open sky,
Could well be the manifestation of death itself,
Ah,,,
What is it with you?
Ah,,,
What was that for? You're horrible!
You're the one who's horrible!
Cut!
You really hit me? We're just acting you know?
The dreams and loves of lovers,
And the loves and dreams of the dreamers,
In this metropolis, teeming with human desires,
A man and a woman converse intently,
in a cafe, where young people gather,
Then a lovely lady walks in,
Upon seeing Miyata, without saying so much as a word,,,
A sharp slap!
You! You're horrible!
How dare you say that!
You're the one who's horrible!
Slapped again!
And just who are you?
It's between me and him, please stay out of it,
The impertinence!
How dare you raise your hand against my Miyata-san!
Hey now, stop it the both of you,
Pretty ladies shouldn't be fighting each other,
This is between me and her,
You should keep your mouth shut,
Oh my, it's a showdown!
But then,,,
That's enough,
Goodbye,
She bid farewell and walked away,
A single tear fell down her cheek,
One wonders, just what turmoil lies in the lady's heart,
"The Women Who Loved Him"
And with this, the film comes to a close,
A masterpiece!
I laughed so hard that my stomach hurts,
And a poem came to me,
What's that?
I'm heading home to write it now,
Write us a masterpiece,
Ahh,,,
I'll leave Yasuko in your care,
Don't mess around with this gifted actress,
Hahaha,,,
You don't have act in such a dramatic fashion,
Just be your usual self, it'll be more natural,
That way, your beauty will really come alive,
I'm beautiful?
You are beautiful,
You're beautiful enough to me,
You sound like you're trying to seduce me,
I am trying to seduce you,
Nakahara,,,
I want to see you again,
You don't have to concern yourself with anything else,
Your existence,
is everything to me,
Things usually just fall right into place for me,
But now I feel like such a fool,
A bigger fool than I have ever been before,
A fool,
I'm going home,
So you don't like me that way,
Then why did you agree to meet me?
I never said I didn't like you,
I don't know,,,
Maybe, I like you so much that I might end up saying "I hate you,"
For I'm but a fool,
A gift?
For Nakahara,
Aah,
What's this,
Ooh,
You bought me a toothbrush?
Thank you,
What's wrong?
Your face,
It's the first time since coming Tokyo,,,
that you look so kind and gentle,
You're showing kindness for the first time too, isn't it?
You were playing marbles by yourself?
Yeah,
You got into a fight again didn't you?
Argued,
Cussed like a sailor,
Threw fists,
Hurt them as much as your hurt yourself,
And then all alone, playing marbles,
Nakahara Chuya's loneliness takes the shape of marbles,
Don't speak like you understand me,
Just because you've been hanging around
with a bunch of miserable writers and critics,
Doesn't mean you understand what the loneliness of spirit is like,
I will dedicate my whole life to poetry!
Dedicate your whole life?
What's so funny?
There are people who dedicate their whole lives to love!
Men like that are so much better,
Who are you talking about?
- Don't touch me! - Oi!
The reason I lose to you,
Is because I'm smitten with you,
And so I hold back,
A loss is a loss,
I've decided,
I'm coming over to yours,
Ahh,
I see,
Wait for me,
I'll go pack my things,
Where's Nakahara?
He's out,
Shikishima,
Yo,
You came by my place?
Uhh,,,
Yeah,,,
I see,
I'm glad we didn't miss each other,
Ahh,,,
I stopped by Nakamuraya,
The mood changed when I showed up, everyone stopped talking,
They were so afraid that I'd jump on something they said and start a fight,
Everyone was on guard,
If you don't have the guts to stand behind what you say, then just quit,
Kobayashi,
Yeah,
All these people, dabbling in French literature,
They're but feeble imitations of you,
No fun at all,
You aim straight at the very core of their essence and being,
That word you like to use,
Right at their 'soul,'
Ahh,
While everyone is sparring with bamboo sticks,
You come charging in swinging a real blade,
No wonder they find you a nuisance,
And the only one who can go toe-to-toe with me,,,
is you,
What's going on?
Going somewhere?
Well,,,
Yes,
I see,
So that's it,
That's a lot of luggage,
Did you get everything?
Kimono, mirror, makeup,,,
And,,,
What about bowls,,,
Chopsticks,,,
Cups?
It's quite a burden to take it all,
It'll be bother isn't it?
Without,
Of course it'll be a hassle, but,,,
Even if it's heavy, you should still take them with you, don't you think?
Here, my heart,
Put it in a bowl, and eat it,
I can't,,,
I can't have this,,,
That's why I have to go,
Shall I take over?
I'm fine, Thanks,
I'll carry it,
Consider it my last act of service,
Why don't you stay for some tea?
Let's sit and chat for a bit,
Alright,
That must have been tiring,
Yes, it was,
Thank you for everything you've done for me,
I'd rather have some alcohol,
Do you have anything good to drink?
Yes, I do,
You can find cups on the kitchen shelf,
Okay,
"Okay"?
What toast should we make on an occasion such as this?
"Here's to the soft-hearted cuckold! "
Something like that?
I'll have a drink too,
Bitter,
It's what I chose,
I didn't set out to betray you,
It's just that I love Kobayashi more than you,
That's how I made my decision,
It was my own choice,
You only think you made your own decision,
Actually, he made the decision for you,
This guy,,,
He's a master at manipulating people,
That's how he makes his way through life,
I made my own decision,
He speaks reason with you as if he understands everything,
But in the end, reason is just reason alone,
You're merely skimming the surface of life, aren't you?
Nakahara,
Strange thing is,,,
We're going through the same thought process,
To deny me is to deny yourself,
I believe in your genius,
But,,,
These are two different matters,
You're pathetic,
Enough,
We're only making each other look worse,
Nakahara-san!
Nakahara-san,,,
Ahh,,,
What's with that look?
Like a wife calming down her husband in a fight,
You're not even my woman,
Tell me, how the hell are you going to sleep today?
You only have one futon,
I'll send it over some day,
A futon soaked with our scent,
I'm finally here,
Oi, Tatsuno, lend me some money,
What happened with the last time?
I drank it all in one night,
I'm not loaning you money for alcohol again,
There's no end to it,
This time it's for living expenses,
Huh?
Do you even have a life?
A woman,
A woman?
The woman that was kicking up a fuss with Nakahara Chuya?
That's right, She lives with me now,
That's why I need money,
Lend me 200 yen,
200 yen?
That's a lot of money,
What kind of luxuries are you indulging her with?
The gal can't cook,
So every time, we either get meals delivered, or buy food to go from an eatery,
Kaizosha (Publishing) is holding a competition, right?
On literary criticism,
Yeah,
The first prize is 1,000 yen,
I'll pay you back with that,
It's not a done deal that you're going to win first prize, is it?
Oh, it's done,
I'm winning it,
Who else is there?
This is a lovely vase,
I found it at a rummage sale,
It's genuine Joseon white porcelain,
Genuine?
I'm a connoisseur of antiques,
I know what I'm talking about,
The old man at the antique shop was out of his depth,
He thought it was a fake,
I haggled with him and it was mine for 10 yen,
You're a connoisseur of many things, aren't you?
I guess you could say that,
Say,,,
We've been living under the same roof for days and days,,,
Hmm,
Isn't it strange,,,
That we haven't done it even once?
Somehow,,,
I'm not in the mood for it,
I'm not attractive,,,
That's not it,
You're an incredibly alluring woman,
Then why don't you even hold me,
You're right,
Why don't I?
Tell me,
Is it because of Nakahara?
He shows up here every night, doesn't he?
It's like he's checking in to see when we've done it,
I,,,
want to show him we have,
You have to take me with you!
Mommy!
You lied to me!
When a woman falls in love, she does so with her whole body and soul,
You're writing a thesis and you even don't know that?
Yasuko,
Harder,,,
I desired you
like a soul consumed by thirst,
The source of that thirst,,,
Was Nakahara,
I wanted to touch Nakahara
through your body,
Is your love for me,,,
the same as before?
Yes,
I hadn't expected you to be so defenceless in love,
It surprised me,
In the arms of a man, you are,,,
Timid like a rabbit,
Submissive like a dog,
It's this hidden nature of yours,
that men find enthralling,
Analysing me again?
You strip my body naked and pick apart my thoughts,
I'm not a piece of work that you critique,
Which do you love more, this vase or me?
Yasuko,
Yasuko!
Yasuko,
Oi, Kobayashi!
You home?
Kobayashi's not home,
I see,
I brought you a celebratory gift,
Thank you,
That's good,
Could you please leave?
The two of us alone like this,
Kobayashi won't like it,
He brings home something for dinner every day,
How thoughtful of him,
When you were with me, you were fine being alone with a guest,
Because you weren't the jealous type,
I was jealous,
I just didn't show it,
Even when you were alone with Kobayashi, I,,,
I'll stop,
This means you're completely in love with him,
Right?
Hey!
Please just go,
The atmosphere is just stifling, it's suffocating,
Please, just leave me alone,
What's wrong?
Clock,,,
Did you buy it?
Nakahara left it,
He said it was a gift,
Aahhhhh!
No, no, no, no, no,,,,
Throw it out,
I hate the sound,
Throw it away, quickly!
Don't you understand? Nakahara's hearing the same sound!
The same clock,
is ringing in both houses at the same time!
It's all connected!
The clocks, they are connecting us,,,
Throw it away!
Destroy it! Now!
Stop it! Stop it!
Ahh,,, it stopped,
"The Song that Morning" (1926), Songs of the Goat (1934)
-- Depilautumn (1981), translated by Kenneth L, Richard, John L, Riley
The ceiling is the colour of cochineal
and seeping light subverts the door,
rural echoes of the songs of war
hands clutch at straws and nothing reveal,
The sky may be the blue of teal
but birdsongs unheard we can ignore,
as even my admonishings grow bored
now her heart's so removed and unreal,
The morning is anxious with the smell of pine
diffusing my dreams, my disparate dreams,
the wind with sighs, the forest with lines,
The passive sky expanding seems,
scumbled down to the hills supine
my beautiful and my disparate dreams,
The ceiling is the colour of cochineal
and seeping light subverts the door,
rural echoes of the songs of war
hands clutch at straws and nothing reveal,
The sky may be the blue of teal
but birdsongs unheard we can ignore,
as even my admonishings grow bored
now her heart's so removed and unreal,
The morning is anxious with the smell of pine
diffusing my dreams, my disparate dreams,
the wind with sighs, the forest with lines,
The passive sky expanding seems,
scumbled down to the hills supine
my beautiful and my disparate dreams,
These are exactly the words I wanted to hear,
[TN: "The Song that Morning/Morning Song" (and "Hour of Death/Deathbed") would later be adapted to song by composer Moroi Saburo, whom Nakahara met a year later in 1927,]
It's simply melodic,
Nakahara,
You're a genius,
Thank you, I wrote it while in a state of delirium,
So I wasn't too sure,,,
Yasuko's been acting strange lately,
Yeah, I felt it too,
It's your fault,
When she was with me,
At least she was in a good mental state,
In any case, she's slowly getting worse,
So I make her breakfast in the mornings, right?
I would serve miso soup with julienned radish,
She'd pick up the radish with her chopsticks,
If the cut isn't exactly squared off, she would refuse it,
And if even one in a thousand is cut wrong, it's no good,
Then there's natto over rice,
Each serving has to be a precise amount - exactly thirteen,
Of what?
The number of natto beans!
Counts them out one by one,
Not one more, nor one less,
Her nerves just can't handle it,
It's abnormal,
You're the one who made it abnormal,
I did not!
Are these petals falling,
Or being scattered?
You understand then, You do,
I am like a water weed
when the wind blows
I'm drifting
I'm floating
To where I do not know
By day, I journey on,,,
Which number wooden plank is the hem of my kimono resting on?
The fourteenth,
I think I'll go make dinner,
It's cold, close the shutters,
If you convert the sound from the closing shutters into a number, what is it?
3,333,
You're wrong,
Isn't it just one?
I'm not asking you anything difficult at all,
Why do you lie to me?
I'm just tired today, my mind isn't too clear,
I'm tired too, you know,
I sit here all day, waiting for you,
I wait, only for you!
It's exhausting,
How about this,
Why don't the three of us go out for a change?
Got it!
Jackpot!
She's actually doing better than I expected,
Today's an exception,
She's in good spirits seeing you,
You pamper her too much,
You should treat her like I do,
Hey! Aim carefully!
Hitting, kicking,,, in a torrent of emotions,
That's right,
That's how you keep her neuroses at bay,
Instead, she'll just run away from me,
And the same thing repeats itself,
It's exhausting, isn't it?
It's like the Siberian exile,
Siberian exile?
There's this punishment, right, Where they make you use a bucket,
To transfer water between two tanks,
Scooping water from one side to the other,
And then back again,
It's a never-ending slog,
I'd say our relationship,
Feels rather like that,
Woah!
Got it!
Jackpot!
Twice,,,
He's like an angel, isn't he?
Eh?
Somehow, that's what it feels like,
He's gliding along just a smidge above the ground,
It's as if he's descended from the sky,
Ah, I want to dance,
Hey, let's go dancing,
She's good, isn't she?
She must have learnt that at Kamata Studios,
Well she is an actress after all, technically,
The one huddled over, paralysed in a neurotic episode,
And this person dancing the Charleston,
It's like two different women,
I don't understand,
It's not that you don't understand,
Why don't you just be honest and say, "that looks delicious,"
Bingo,
She's delectable,
You're a connoisseur of life,
You're always drawn to the finer things in life,
So are you saying that she's got class?
On the contrary, not at all,
That's why the two of you are wrong for each other,
Is it alright if I join you?
Why wouldn't it be?
Let's see what's the fun in this,
Yeah, I guess it's pretty fun,
I have a date to go matchmaking,
Matchmaking? You're getting married?
Well,,,
Who is it? Your match,
She's the daughter of a distant relative,
And quite the catch it seems,
It's like she's born to be someone's wife,
And she's beautiful too,
How would you know she's beautiful if you've never even met her?
Well,,,
A real beauty,
Oi!
Hey, hey, hey,,,
Calm down!
Oi, Yasuko!
What's with the two of them?
That's simply their love language,
You've become quite beautiful,
Is that right,
You're comparing me to your match?
It's not flattery,
How do you see yourself?
They say someone else's flowers always look more beautiful,
I don't think you're beautiful,
But, you are erotic,
A woman, huddled over on the tatami, stricken by her neuroses,
Is unexpectedly erotic,
Stop it,
Are you really going matchmaking?
Yes,
So you're getting married,
Rather than a woman who brings misery,
I've come to want a woman who brings me happiness,
I,,,
don't like this,
It's none of your business,
Doesn't this seem like being put out to stud?
What is?
You, of course,
Like a bull in heat being led to a heifer,
Just to be bred,
To breed?
I don't like it,,,
I just don't like it!
Nakahara,,!
Idiot! You trying to kill yourself?
Let's break up,
I'm leaving this house,
Don't go,
You need two crutches - Nakahara, and me,
When you left Nakahara, you lost one crutch
and became neurotic,
Isn't it better to get rid of both crutches completely?
Don't you think so?
But I love you,
I love everything about you,
I'm hopelessly in love with you,
That's why I'm dependent on you,
I'm just a crutch for you,
If we stay together, you'll go crazy,
Don't go, please don't go,,,
I won't let you go!
If you leave me, your neurosis will be cured,
I guarantee it,
If you don't mind, you can have this,
I bought it for my child,
Seeing as you look extremely thirsty,
I,,,
I was trying to connect spiritually,
Huh?
I wanted,,,
to bring us together, soul to soul,
I thought it would be,
the deepest, purest, kind of love,
Rather than connecting
through our bodies, or through money,
That felt so much more beautiful to me,
But the man, he ran away,
It's as if my heart had been ripped out,
and left behind, all alone, Hollow inside,
Won't you hold me?
Have you lost your mind?
This is just,,,
completely inappropriate,
I had no such intentions when I gave you the ramune (soda),
How rude!
Hey, welcome back,
[TN: Kobayashi ended his relationship with Yasuko shortly after he graduated in 1928, and moved to Nara,]
Kobayashi went to Nara,
That guy sure ran far, far away, huh?
I see,
I came to bring you back with me,
I'm probably the only one who can handle you,
You know that deep in your heart too, don't you?
I remember Kyoto,
Those days were fun,
Those were the days of our childhood,
Nothing but pure joy,
I see,,, we were kids then,,,
Our childhood days are over,
I'm not going back to you,
I'll manage on my own somehow,
Kobayashi and you,
may have taken me on a little detour,
But still,,,
I'll manage on my own,
Yasuko, don't push yourself like this,
We'll each fall apart if we're not together,
It's over,
What's over?
Our misfortune,
Our misfortune?
It's over,
It's over,,,
Cut! OK!
Alright, it's a wrap!
- Good work, - Thank you very much,
- Thanks for your hard work, Hasegawa-san, - Thank you,
Well, well,
Hey, it's been a while,
It hasn't just been a while, has it,
How many years is it?
So it was a boy,,, he must have been adorable,
What was his name?
[TN: Nakahara's son Fumiya, died of tuberculosis in 1936, age 2 ,]
Fumiya,
Nakahara Fumiya,
Fumiya,
Fumiya,,,
That's a nice name,
He must have been a prodigy,
Just like you,
Seems like such a long time ago,,, those days,
Everyone's the same,
We might look a bit different,
But the truth is we haven't changed at all,
Isn't that so?
[TN: In 1932, Kobayashi became a lecturer at Meiji University in the newly established Department of Literature, He would later be promoted to professor in 1938,]
Kobayashi-sensei,
Please stop with the sensei,
It's an amazing achievement,
You know, I read "A Märchen," (A Fairytale)
What did you think?
[TN: Yasuko is reciting an excerpt from "A Märchen," which was eventually published posthumously in the anthology Poems of Past Days, Translation in Depilautumn (1981) by Kenneth L, Richard, John L, Riley]
"One night in a far off place,"
"a valley held a river that was nothing but stone"
"shone with a softening, "
"softening sun,"
Lovely,
I trust your opinion more than anyone else's,
Certainly more than this guy's authority,
As always, it's sad,
What value is there in poems that are only sad,
Don't say that,
Your poems are so much more than that,
Really, we've not changed at all,
As if it's that easy to change,
I'm hungry,
Lately, I get hungry at all times,
Yasuko,
Oi!
You're strong,,,
You're strong,
It's meningitis apparently,
The tuberculosis bacteria have gotten to his brain,
He should have been hospitalised a long time ago,
But he didn't want to,
That's his wife,
Always watching over Nakahara from the sides,
She's a good wife,
There's a phone call for you,
Who's it from?
A man, he says it's urgent,
Hasegawa speaking,
It's me,
Nakahara's dead,
He suddenly became delirious last night,
Then before noon today,,,
Hey, are you listening?
Are you listening properly?
Yes,,,
The cause of death was tuberculous meningitis — and also miliary tuberculosis,
What'll you do?
Come now to offer incense?
No,,,
I don't want to see that man dead,
Hey, wait, don't hang up!
Go see him one last time,
Nakahara,,,
died looking like a wet rag wrung dry,
You can't run away without seeing him,
Hasegawa-san! We're starting!
Hasegawa-san, it's this way,
Say,,,
Yes,
Do you know Nakahara Chuya?
Is he an actor?
Nakahara Chuya,,,
is dead,
Hasegawa-san?
Hasegawa-san!
You may bid your farewells,
I am Hasegawa,
I'm Nakahara,
Thank you very much for taking the time to come,
I meant to come sooner,,,
My apologies,
May I,,,
offer my respects?
Please,
It's over,
Our misfortune,,,
Sayonara,
[TN: Nakahara died in Kamakura Sanatorium, 22nd October, 1937, Kobayashi took a break from Meiji University, and spent the last week at Nakahara's bedside, Other literati would visit daily,]
I couldn't bear to see him reduced to ash and bone,
He looked so sad even in death,
The crabapple trees,
They were in full bloom,
Nakahara and I sat under them,
We sat there forever, in silence,
The petals rained down endlessly,
The petals were being scattered,
They weren't just falling,
Being scattered petal, by petal, one at a time,
It was unmistakable, the pace, the order,
With clear intent and precision,
And as I stared at the petals,
it all suddenly became too much to bear,
Then,,,
He said,
"It's alright,"
"Let's go home,"
He could see right through me,
To be so exposed,
Won't you despair too?
Is my back crooked?
Is it crooked?
It feels like my spine is bending,
little by little,
Why is that?
Because I've been walking without my crutches,
Perhaps,
Sayonara,
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"Never to Return" (1926) "ゆきてかえらぬ" Kyoto — World’s end, the sunlight that fell down to earth was warm, a warm wind blowing through the flowers, On a wooden bridge, the dust that morning silent, a mailbox red & shining all day long, a solitary baby carriage on the street, a lonely pinwheel, No one around who lived there, not a soul, no children playing there, & I with no one near or dear to me, no obligation but to watch the colour of the sky above a weathervane, Not that I was bored, The taste of honey in the air, nothing substantial but enough to eat & live from, I was smoking cigarettes, but only to enjoy their fragrance, And weirdly I could only smoke them out of doors, For now my worldly goods consisted of a single towel, I didn’t own a pillow, much less a futon mattress, True I still had a tooth brush, but the only book I owned had nothing but blank pages, Still I enjoyed the heft of it when I would hold it in my hands from time to time, Women were lovely objects but not once did I try to go with one, It was enough to dream about them, Something unspeakable would urge me on, & then my heart, although my life was purposeless, started pounding with a kind of hope, In the woods was a very strange park, where women, children & men would stroll by smiling wildly, They spoke a language I didn’t understand & showed emotions I couldn’t unravel, Looking up at the sky, I saw a spider web, silver & shining, - Nakahara Chuya (1907-1937)